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Maintenance not getting paid

(8 Posts)
Thisisnotadrill Thu 07-Mar-19 19:00:17

Child is 16 his dad and I separated before he was born has always been fairly amicable.

He married the women we split over they have a child.

He has always worked but never sticks at anything. He struggles with MH issues sometimes.

When DS was a baby he reduced his maintenance to save for a house.

He gave up his job a few years ago and had his own business but I don’t think he is doing that well.

The last two months he’s been really late with the maintenance (has texted me apologising) and this is after we (he agreed to help) have committed to quite high travel costs for child to get to college out of town.

I don’t want to go to the CMA and get shitty but its really beginning to piss me off that because I am not a company as such I am the “bill” that doesn’t get paid.

He has paid me about £40 a week for the last 16 years and has never raised it.

So frustrating.

Graphista Thu 07-Mar-19 20:19:55

I don't understand why you wouldn't go to the cms. Your child is owed this money and your ex is taking piss stop being a doormat.

Get onto them ASAP.

Thisisnotadrill Thu 07-Mar-19 20:44:24

Because he’s self employed I will prob get next to nothing.

Graphista Thu 07-Mar-19 21:01:13

Yea I've read of self employed exs using that loophole although to be honest in that position myself I'd be making a call to income tax dept. If he's lying about his taxable income (which is what cm is based on) then they'll be very interested.

Thisisnotadrill Thu 07-Mar-19 22:21:53

I don’t want to bury the guy - he’s a nice guy and a good dad.

I just want him to understand I have to pay my bills on time and his money contributes towards that.

Graphista Thu 07-Mar-19 22:40:53

Ugh I'm so tired of op's defending their ex's and describing them as "nice guys good dads" AFTER they've clearly described the guys actions as otherwise.

Nice guys don't mess their ex's around

Good dads provide for their children

He is neither. Stop making excuses for him. I'm pretty confident you'll find out it that he's far better off than he's been claiming to you - seen it all before - he just begrudges paying for HIS child

Bookworm4 Thu 07-Mar-19 22:45:16

He's not a good guy when supporting his son is last on his list. Stop excusing his poor behaviour, self employed are assessed on their tax return( which is no doubt very low) and your entitled to 15% of his income for one child. Tell him his son is the first thing he pays for before anything bar his rent! Does his wife work? I'm sure £40 is affordable to them.

Bookworm4 Thu 07-Mar-19 22:46:47

I see he has another child, does he grudge them £40?

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