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AIBU?

AIBU to not think DD is overweight?

51 replies

Strugglingonagain · 07/03/2019 17:22

So DD in reception was seen by school nurse today. I put her details into nhs bmi thing and it said she's overweight.

Now I see lots of posts on here by parents saying their child isn't overweight when sometimes they are.. But! I know my DD is not skinny in the slightest, however she is also very tall. So my question is.. if you are 91st % for weight but also 91st for height is that ok or should you still be less?

And AIBU for worrying about this so much?

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iolaus · 07/03/2019 17:24

To me if they match in height and weight thats how they should be - you can have some variation obviously but it should be similar

So in your case both on 91%ile is absolutely normal
Both on the 5th is normal
One on the 5th and the other on the 91st is either overweight or underweight depending on which is the higher one

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AmIRightOrAMeringue · 07/03/2019 17:27

I would have thought normal if they both match. However BMI is a measure of height / weight ratio so it's quite confusing if it's saying she is overweight. Can you ask school for some more guidance?

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soontobefour4 · 07/03/2019 17:27

Agree with @iolaus, DS is 19 months but could pass for 2 and a half. He's 98th percentile for height and weight and when I asked the health visitor about it she said there is no need to worry as they are both level.

Don't forget there has to be bigger and smaller children for there to be an average.

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Strugglingonagain · 07/03/2019 17:29

amiright yes when I look at the info on her red book charts she's top end of both but roughly equivalent. But on the nhs thing where you do height weight gender age etc it said overweight.
Yes I can contact the nurses and may do that. The letter also said we would get another letter if she is overweight so I wait for that I guess.

I'm under no illusion she's skinny or anything.. But now rather worried.

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SpringerLink · 07/03/2019 17:33

As a rough guide, it's normal for children aged 5-10 to be able to see their ribs clearly when then stand normally. This may seem skinny by today's standards, but that's because lots of children are overwieght and we have normalised it.

If the NHS BMI thing says overweight, just book an appointment with your GP to discuss it. They can unpick the complicated height and weight issues and either put your mind at rest or recommend a course of action if your DD is overweight.

I have a DD who is overweight according to the BMI thingy, but it actually not unhealthy as she has very low body fat (and FWIW you can see her ribs). She's just got the build of a rugby player and is solid muscle. But that's very unusual. The BMI thing on the NHS website is pretty accurate.

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FermatsTheorem · 07/03/2019 17:35

Same centile for height and weight should be okay, I think.

Did the BMI calculator take account of age? Healthy BMIs are different at different stages of childhood.

Also, beware of the fact that we (UK population collectively) are getting heavier, so a child can be overweight and not look out of place relative to their peers, because a significant proportion of their peers are also overweight. A friend of mine used to be in charge of sending out these letters for our area. She reckoned for every 10 sent, she'd get one response of "you know, maybe he/she does need to lose weight, we'll look into healthier food and smaller portion sizes" and 9 responses of "my child is just big-boned." They definitely weren't all just "big-boned." (NB, not saying one way or another re. your child, just beware being "in denial" as a parent. We all of us do it about something at some point.)

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CMOTDibbler · 07/03/2019 17:37

How tall are you and her dad? If you are both on the 91st percentile, then its OK, but children who are taking in too many calories can grow (as a child, their end height will be the same) faster and be 'over tall' - it's not as straightforward as adult BMI

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JiltedJohnsJulie · 07/03/2019 17:39

My DN is and always has been on the 98th percentile for both height and weight. She is beautifully in proportion.

I'd tend to ignore the BMI and only look at centiles.

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CountessVonBoobs · 07/03/2019 17:43

Overweight children are also usually over-height for their age as well; because of the excess calories they attain their growth sooner than a child who isn't overweight would do. So it's not true that if they're 98th centile for both they're not overweight.

I would get a GP appointment as suggested to discuss.

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PolarBearDisguisedAsAPenguin · 07/03/2019 17:43

I was told when DD2 was 91st centile that it was the obese cut off. 🤷🏻‍♀️

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CountessVonBoobs · 07/03/2019 17:46

And tbh, since you describe her as "not skinny in the slightest" as well as tall, that does rather suggest she is overweight. As a PP said you should generally be able to see a healthy-weight child's ribs.

The children's NHS BMI guide takes into account age and sex and is pretty accurate.

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DanielRicciardosSmile · 07/03/2019 17:47

@PolarBear but that doesn't make sense without considering the height percentile. Height on 50th and weight on 91st, yes I can see they have a point. Both on 91st, child is just bigger than average. By the same rule, weight on the 50th would be cause for concern if height was on the 2nd, surely?

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WorraLiberty · 07/03/2019 17:49

I was also wondering about the "not skinny in the slightest" comment.

IME most kids who are not being overfed and who are taking enough exercise, are skinny. Especially by today's standards.

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HarrysOwl · 07/03/2019 17:56

Does she have a healthy diet, OP? Does she participate in a lot of sports? Only ask as it could be she's healthy for her, as such, if she's got a good diet and is active. It'd be nothing to worry about.

There's a difference between an overweight BMI because of muscle & being perfectly healthy and an overweight BMI because you may be carrying too much fat.

How about the rest of the household?

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Strugglingonagain · 07/03/2019 17:58

To answer a couple of points..

Yes both me and husband are tall (5ft9, 6ft4). His side of family are generally overweight so this is something I've worried about.

DD has been on 75th percentile plus for height and weight since birth.
She has a v.good appetite so I am aware of the potential. She does like running around and does dancing lessons, but also likes a lot of sitting down activities.

By not skinny I meant I wouldn't say she's thin, but I would put her as average.. Not fat. Not sure if that makes sense though.

Ribs thing is interesting.
I can make a Drs appt. We do seem to be there a lot recently though! I'll see if the letter comes through from nurse in the next week or 2 I think.

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BuildAParsnip · 07/03/2019 17:59

Put the measurements for height and weight into the nhs calculator and then you'll know.

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HarrysOwl · 07/03/2019 18:00

BuildAParsnip OP has done that.

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BarbarianMum · 07/03/2019 18:01

Generally weight centiles should be a fair bit height centiles in children - so 75th for height, 50th for weight, that sort of thing. Most indiciduals who have matching centiles are overweight although there are a few for whom this is a healthy weight.

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BuildAParsnip · 07/03/2019 18:03

Blush sorry!

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SwayingInTime · 07/03/2019 18:04

The shorter you are, the lower your BMI has to be to remain a healthy size. This is actually true for adults and there's a more complex calculation that accounts for this available but it's so hard to do it's useless.

To make it work for children their BMI is calculated and their BMI is plotted against all the other BMIs of children their age. So if only eg7% of children their age have a higher BMI, you are told they are overweight.

Fwiw, my two youngest are both on about the 88th percentile for BMI so technically healthy but I can see they're a bit overweight so I don't think it's too harsh. My eldest is always comfortably in the bottom half but is naturally very narrow, so equally, I do feel life is a bit unfair!

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pizzabadger · 07/03/2019 18:05

91st for both height and weight is just in the overweight category if you're going by centiles ( which you always should for children)

https://www.rcpch.ac.uk/sites/default/files/Girls2-188yearsgrowthhchart.pdf

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SwayingInTime · 07/03/2019 18:10

BMI centiles are used for children.

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GrumbleBumble · 07/03/2019 18:10

If all children were an OK weight them the tallest children would probably be the heaviest and that would be fine. But about a third of children are.overweight so the top weight centiles will be made up of the very over weight children. OP DH and I are the same height as you and your DH my son has been 98th centile or more for length/height since birth. He has never been above the 50th centile for weight so tall children are not automatic the heaviest.

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XiCi · 07/03/2019 18:10

We were told by a Consultant Paediatrician that the height and weight centiles should be in proportion. Therefore 95th percentile for height and weight would not be a concern. He said its only an issue if the weight centile was high and the height centile low or vice versa

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EvaHarknessRose · 07/03/2019 18:12

Everyone needs to eat good fresh unprocessed food in the main, eat regularly, eat enough, do some exercise. As long as you are doing that for the whole family and encouraging and modelling positive body image then you won’t go far wrong. Getting angsty about not seeing ribs is not going to be very productive, and neither is encouraging dieting behaviour which will backfire.

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