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Me vs the dog AIBU

(8 Posts)
Jibberish24 Mon 04-Mar-19 15:33:50

Long story,partner is ex addict has dog,I have 2older kids, we met I got him to go rehab all was well fast forward 3years we had a baby he lived with his mum I had bad post natal depression,minimal support from him, moved in together which I paid for, baby turned 1, asked him to leave 2months later as I became doggy day care,for his old very smelly dog who is 12 barks whenever we leave.i am now hostage to this big jumpy doberman warty dog I cannot leave without her barking she only listens to partner, when in the house she whines all day till he comes home I feel like I can't go out I've had to say no to seeing friends as the dog barks loud when alone,friends wont visit as the dog barks when people come in,she gets walks every day well fed and watered attention bones socialization etc but massive separation anxiety to other half.AIBU to refuse to look after the dog because he just isn't dealing with her,I do her walks,he used to but then he'd come home go walk the dog and I'd be left with getting the baby to sleep he would come home eat dinner relax and not see baby, so we changed it so I walk her so he can help me,but she needs a big walk.. let's also add on money wise he keeps what he earns,tax credits and housing benefit pays the rest,he owes me hundreds of pounds from the move, he has been secretive in the past,I get moody I'm not perfect. He moved back in a month ago after a month living at his mums,im just finding the dog too much stress, there's no peace and quiet.before me he would leave the dog with his mum who also doesn't like the dog whining constantly. Any ideas?I tried playing with the dog distraction extra walks but I feel like my life revolves around the dog and with 3 kids and a house to run my life feels not nice :-( xxx thanks

Shoxfordian Mon 04-Mar-19 15:42:33

Doesn't sound like he's bringing much to the party. Tell him and his smelly dog to move back to his Mum's

Doghorsechicken Mon 04-Mar-19 15:43:35

I don’t think it’s fair to suddenly rehome an elderly dog. He had the dog before you came along so you knew he had ‘baggage’. As it is a large dog and is 12 years old I can’t imagine it will live much longer. Could you just ride it out for a while longer?

However, I think your problems lie with your DP rather than the dog else you wouldn’t have mention that he keeps all his money and also owes you money. And it’s an on/off relationship. I think you probably need to split up. Please don’t make him rehome the dog and then split up with him anyway!

Nesssie Mon 04-Mar-19 15:48:32

I don't think the dog is the real problem here. You obviously knew about the dog when you got involved with him and its very U to ask him to rehome a 12 year old doberman who really doesn't have long to live.

NutElla5x Mon 04-Mar-19 16:00:31

Wow your partner really has landed on his feet with you hasn't he!? I can't believe he gets to do so little around the home AND gets to keep all of his wages and all you are moaning about is the dog,who has anxiety issues due to the way your partner raised him the poor thing. Throw your piss taking partner out along with his dog and let his mother deal with them. You don't need him and have enough on your plate by the sounds of it.

BridlingtonSand Mon 04-Mar-19 16:07:23

It's strange that you see the dog as the problem.

LellowYedbetter Mon 04-Mar-19 17:24:30

Please don’t rehome the poor dog. He won’t have long left and if you do that, his last few years/months will be full of fear, confusion and heartbreak.

Your partner on the other hand sounds like a total loser, I’d get rid of him without s second thought.

Parly Mon 04-Mar-19 19:05:18

The dog needs an out and someone to help him most because he's having to endure and suffer all this shit and nonsense with you two and no-one even wanting or giving a shit for him.

Speak to someone locally (vets, dog rescue / RSPCA) and at least do right by this dog in trying to find him somewhere he can move to that is calmer, where he has company and people that will care for him.

Don't think "Oh well he'll be dead soon" think "He'll be dead soon.. We need to let him have peace and quiet before he goes"

You owe him that much the poor bastard sad

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