Returning gifts and requesting cash

[RubyWho]

Hello,

I can’t tell if AIBU or not and have have mixed views, so I thought I’d put it to the experts.

I bought some gifts - for no specific occasion- for two children in my family. I bought them because I thought they were cute and the kids would like them. I sent them via post and asked the children’s parent to confirm if and when they arrived. The parent confirmed they had arrived but asked me to return said gifts and give them (the parent) the money instead as that would be more useful.

Is this UR? Ungrateful? Or am I just being overly precious?

[InDubiousBattle]

It's unbelievably rude of them.

[Merryoldgoat]

Sweet Jesus - what is wrong with people?!

Of course YANBU.

[SusieFlo]

That is unbelievably bad form, in my opinion.

Ungrateful, rude and entitled - what has happened to people!

[AllStar14]

What was your response? I hope it was along the lines of "no I fucking can't you cheeky bastard!"

[Leeds2]

Let them return the gifts to you, keep them to give to other children in the future and do not give any money to the entitled parents. I would also think very carefully before sending any more presents in the future.

[RubyWho]

My response was “...wow”. I’m considering sending the money as well so the kids can actually keep said gifts. But then, I’m a sad old pushover and I love the children. So.

[IM0GEN]

Unacceptably rude.

Unless there is something crucial you are not telling us, like the parents are asylum seekers without money to buy food.

[HappydaysArehere]

Some people!!!!!! I would reply that they can send them back as they weren’t appropriate as you know just the children who would like them. Then never bother sending anything again.

[Barrenfieldoffucks]

Do not send money. Your response was fine, don't message again

[Fuzzyheadache]

Really rude!
How old are the children?

[BlueMerchant]

Unbelievable. Tell them the children may as well keep the gifts as you are not giving money- ever. If they want to they can give them to a charity.

[hugelypregnant]

Oh god, do not send cash too!!!

[SleepingStandingUp]

Unless they are really poor and the money would be used for food Yanbu.
If they're on the breadline then I can understand it more but their approach was wrong

[GU24Mum]

Very rude of them!!

They'd have to pay to return them (please tell me they don't want you to pay for return postage.....) and you'd then have to hope you could get a full refund let alone the hassle of that.

I'd be tempted to say "Disappointed (NB: not "sorry" as that implies you are somehow in the wrong) that they didn't like the gifts. I'll leave you to pass them if that's what you'd like to do".

Then, if you really do want to keep buying presents, I'd ask for suggestions before you send anything else (but make sure if they only ask for expensive things that you go back and ask for cheaper suggestions). If you've had enough of it by now - which I would have done - just stop buying things for them in the future and if you're ever asked about it, just say that as they didn't seem to like the things you chose that it's probably better for you not to bother.

[LotsToThinkOf]

How rude! I'd say, as the gifts weren't for a specific occasion, that if the children don't like them then you'll send them back. Get her to post the items back so you can return them and just sit back and wait. When she asks you where the money is is then give it to her both barrels about how rude she is.

What is wrong with some people???

[RubyWho]

The kids are 10 and 11.

[SpeakUpXXWomen]

Don't indulge this, engage backbone. If you want to send anything further then a book on manners will suffice.

[GunpowderGelatine]

What did you buy them?

I ask because once on MN the same kind of thing happened to a poster - they bought their nephew a gift and asked their sibling if he enjoyed it to which they replied "no not really" - it was a Lego chess set, the nephew was 16 and not particularly into Lego! In that situation lots of people agreed the OP WBU

[missbattenburg]

"It's the gifts or nothing. You choose".

[dietcokemegafan]

I would just ignore this

[outpinked]

Wow that is exceptionally rude. We tend to be given gift receipts if it is clothing just in case it doesn’t fit but I’d never ever ask for the money instead . Horrible.

Chalk it down to a lesson learnt and never send the entitled fuckers anything again.

[Purplecatshopaholic]

WHAT? Has the world gone mad? How unbelievably rude of them!! Ignore! But having a word with the parents about their attitude might be an idea if you are up for it!

[nettie434]

Sounds rude. Do you have the receipts so they can exchange the gifts themselves? At least you would not have the bother of taking them back or to the shop or posting them

[lottiegarbanzo]

Rudey rude. Do NOT send money, the parents will see you as a cash cow.

If the dc don't want the gifts, they are welcome to re-gift them.