Talk

Advanced search

Lost dream house due to advice of estate agents

(108 Posts)
Jade348 Thu 28-Feb-19 18:53:42

I recently found the perfect house me and my fiancé are currently living with his parents and have been desperately saving to buy our first house together. We wanted a specific area and the perfect house in our price range came up. We went to view the house which needed work doing to it. We put in an over just slightly below the asking price to start off. We was sent an email to advice that there were other people interested on Monday and to be patient with the estate agents as the seller was away. I asked the estate agent if they would make me aware if our offer had been out offered as we was willing to increase a substantial amount. The estate agent advices me to hold off as this was very likely to go to best and final offers as all party’s were very similar positions and similar offers. I went into the estate agents on Wednesday and told them I was feeling very nervous because I really wanted the house I asked for advise on what I should do they advised me to wait and they will be in contact after the seller had been into the office Thursday. Today was the day I waited for a call it got to 1pm I had not received a call, I made a call to the office to make sure they didn’t want me to put the offer in then they said they had the seller in front of them and would be in touch. 4:30pm I received a call to advise that the seller had chosen not to go to best and final offers and picked one of the offers on the table. I am heartbroken I feel I was misadvised we was willing to offer a lot more but they didn’t give us the opportunity, now they are just saying it’s not their choice but the sellers! I understand that but I asked on two occasions for advise on what to do could they not have told me to increase offer if I was willing to do so? Anyone else been in a similar situation. I am not feeling very positive this is the second time we have lost out, we have a 3 year old and we need our own space. We contacted the estate agents explained he asked what was we willing to go to which I told him. he said he would put it to the vendor ( which tells me it must have been higher than what was on the table) the seller said thank you very much but he’s old school and doesn’t want to let anybody else down. I will certainly be learning from this.

fc301 Thu 28-Feb-19 19:06:44

EA represents the vendor. Therefore he can not operate in your best interests. He also cannot dictate to the vendor.

Deadposhtory Thu 28-Feb-19 19:10:28

Put in a higher offer. Agent had to pass it on by law

sweeneytoddsrazor Thu 28-Feb-19 19:11:08

Well the estate agent has to go with what the vendor wants. You could have put in a higher initial offer if you so wished.

SheRaTheAllPowerful Thu 28-Feb-19 19:11:49

I would write a letter to the vendor and put it through the door x

PoliticalBiscuit Thu 28-Feb-19 19:14:17

Put in your highest offer by letter today to both EA and vendor

TheInvestigator Thu 28-Feb-19 19:16:11

You're using advice and advise the wrong way round, and that was really difficult to read. Paragraphs and proper sentences are your friend.

They need to do what their client wants. They got a bunch of offers, they assumed from their experience that it would go to best and final, which is the norm, but the seller chose not too.

Everyone else would have been asking the same thing, so the EA would have been calling back and forth to several bidders and that's not how it's done. A bidding war between 1 or 2, then yes but lots of you... it should have gone to best and final. It's not their fault that the seller returned and said no to the norm.

Shookethtothecore Thu 28-Feb-19 19:16:52

Please try not to fully fall in love with a house until you own it, buying a house is mega stressful and a lot often goes wrong Nd you can loose it at any point.
Learn from this, the vendor has made their choice and keep looking

GreenTulips Thu 28-Feb-19 19:17:18

I second writing a letter stating that you are chain free and looking for a family home add if you have mortgage offer in place solicitors ready to go and will to move at their pace etc

Won’t harm

Youmadorwhat Thu 28-Feb-19 19:20:02

You may put in a higher offer but that doesn’t mean they will accept. The other offer may have been a cash offer and that may suit them better.

FluffyHeadbands Thu 28-Feb-19 19:20:51

If you really wanted to secure the house an asking price offer straight off would have been best. Saves messing about.

The sale might still fall through, make sure the EA knows you are keen and you could always leave your details with the vendor directly.

Aroundtheworldandback Thu 28-Feb-19 19:21:08

Along with the higher offer I would offer them a very close date for exchange.

Blankscreen Thu 28-Feb-19 19:24:46

Some vendors are like this. They have principles and don't believe in people bidding against each other.

They had the offers in front of them and chose the best from that.

Learn form this. If you really like it put in full asking price!

Jubba Thu 28-Feb-19 19:27:45

I echo everyone. Write the offer you are willing to go too. Pop it to the estate agent. And I would also pop one through the door

The estate agent I believe have you the wrong advice. I would of just gone in with the highest. The seller though unltinwtely didn’t go with the beat offer though it seems

Might of been cash offer etc.

Put down all your pros in the letter

Chain free. Mortgage done. Etc. All those.

ilovesooty Thu 28-Feb-19 19:29:44

I'm starting to feel sorry for the people who've had their offer accepted by a seemingly decent vendor.

Fiveredbricks Thu 28-Feb-19 19:30:33

Also sometimes it just goes to whoever the buyer wants to sell their house to OP too tbh. They might just have preferred to sell to a new cash buyer or someone without kids. Some sellers do this.

bigKiteFlying Thu 28-Feb-19 19:30:51

I don't think you lose anything by writing to EA and vendor with a higher offer.

The sellers might be making a decision based on other things like how quickly things could do through.

First house we offered on offered asking price had mortgage agreed in principal and sizable deposit first time buyer so no chain. We were turned down we were told by EA offering more wouldn’t help as they were selling to friends - friends who paid fair bit less than asking price and mucked them round for weeks as their chain almost fell apart – learnt that later.

Being stopped on street by person who had shown us round one house and knowing neighbours through nursery on house we'd offered the thinking seems to have been we’d have offered on another family member’s house we’d also looked round despite making it clear it didn’t suit us confused.

Worked out for us as we learnt later first house was on round side of road for school catchment we wanted - which could have cause us issues with our younger children.

Fairenuff Thu 28-Feb-19 19:32:32

OP already put in a higher offer. It was refused because the buyer had already accepted the other offer and did not want to let that person be gazumped.

SassitudeandSparkle Thu 28-Feb-19 19:32:36

Am I the only one to spot at the end of all that, the EA did put the higher offer forward and the vendor rejected it?!

I'm sorry you lost out on the house OP but I'm not sure why you are blaming the EA for the vendor (sellers) actions. If you wanted to offer higher in the first place then you would have done that.

ChandelierSail Thu 28-Feb-19 19:33:10

Let this be a lesson in future. Don't mess about. Offer what you think the property is worth (and what you can afford).

If that's the asking price then do it.

That's what we did. We saw our ideal house. We'd been looking for ages. We didn't mess about and went straight in with an offer at full asking price. If you really want the house it's not worth missing out for the sake of a few thousand pounds.

Fairenuff Thu 28-Feb-19 19:33:42

'We contacted the estate agents explained he asked what was we willing to go to which I told him. he said he would put it to the vendor ( which tells me it must have been higher than what was on the table) the seller said thank you very much but he’s old school and doesn’t want to let anybody else down.'

Fairenuff Thu 28-Feb-19 19:35:48

OP that's not how it works. You don't put in an offer and then ask the agent to tell you if anyone offers more so that you can raise your offer.

You put in an offer and if it is refused you can raise it. Unfortunately, someone offered more in the first instance and that offer was accepted.

OKBobble Thu 28-Feb-19 19:36:55

Someone had already offered an amount the seller found acceptable. Knowing other people were interested you should have immediately put in your best offer prior to them going to the seller.

The agent acts for the seller remember not you so they are not allowed to advise you.

Inferiorbeing Thu 28-Feb-19 19:37:49

You played the game and lost unfortunately! Life lesson in it- the EA is never on your side as a buyer.. similar happened to us but we ended up with a much better house in a better location so it will all work out

RockinHippy Thu 28-Feb-19 19:38:09

I've been in a similar situation. As above, go round to the property/vendors house & put a letter through the door explaining what has happened, how upset you are that your agent give you bad advice & refused you putting in a higher offer before the decision was made with your contact details etc & say how much you live their house & looked forward to it being your first family home. Doing this meant our house offer was accepted 👍🏼

bigKiteFlying Thu 28-Feb-19 19:41:38

we was willing to offer a lot more but they didn’t give us the opportunity, now they are just saying it’s not their choice but the sellers!
...
We contacted the estate agents explained he asked what was we willing to go to which I told him. he said he would put it to the vendor ( which tells me it must have been higher than what was on the table) the seller

Okay I did miss that you have offered a higher price and EA has passed it on - so assuming the EA has done their job and passed it on them - that's it.

It is the seller's choice who to sell to - all the EA has to do by law is pass all ther offers on.

If you really wanted to secure the house an asking price offer straight off would have been best.

We did that first time we made an offer for same reasons - and got turned down.

Subsequently we've bought twice and found offering just under and then coming up a bit to near asking price has worked much better for us – but I suppose that depends on the local market.

RockinHippy Thu 28-Feb-19 19:41:45

I agree with not putting your heart & soul into the house until you have way more information though. Our house vendor turned out to be a nightmare & loads of non obvious stuff wrong with the house too, we didn't buy in the end

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha Thu 28-Feb-19 19:43:01

I would put a note through the vendor's door just to make sure there's no shenanigans afoot (ie the estate agent's sister buying the house). I can't think of a single good reason for an estate agent not to encourage you to make a higher offer.

However, the seller may just like the look of another buyer better - that of course is their choice to make.

Bringbackthestripes Thu 28-Feb-19 19:46:29

I hope what you learn from this is that if there is a house you really love, and you have the money, offer the full asking price. You put in an offer under the asking price and it was rejected, there may have been similar offers but I imagine they went with the highest one.

Knittedfairies Thu 28-Feb-19 19:49:35

Even if you had put in the highest offer, the seller is not obliged to sell to you though; they can choose which offer to accept.

mumwon Thu 28-Feb-19 19:49:50

send a letter to vendor & say that if things don't work out you are still interested & you wont mess around with price/offer - things can go wrong with any purchase & still could with this - BUT- in the meantime keep looking - we have had this several times over the years & multiple sales & purchases & invariable we landed up with afar better house than the "dream"

BettyDuMonde Thu 28-Feb-19 19:50:05

Vendors with choices often go for a middling offer rather than the top one, to avoid the risk of a mortgage valuation lower than the offer price.

Belenus Thu 28-Feb-19 19:50:21

I'm starting to feel sorry for the people who've had their offer accepted by a seemingly decent vendor.

Likewise. All the putting begging letters through the door wheedling about wanting a family home is quite nauseating. Who knows what the chosen buyers' circumstances are? It's quite possibly their dream home. Look out for a thread asking if they've been gazumped!

XXcstatic Thu 28-Feb-19 19:53:11

I'm not saying this to be mean: I hate posters who bitch about spelling etc for the sake of it. Lots of people have had disrupted educations, lots of people have difficulties with written communication, and I know English may not be your first language, but...

...your OP is really hard to follow. Your grammar and spelling are poor. If I received an offer written like this - either as an estate agent or a vendor - it would put me off. I would worry that you might lack the skills to do all the formalities for a house purchase - mortgage etc. Your communication style makes you sound chaotic and a bit immature. I realise this may be totally unfair as I don't know you - but neither does the vendor.

In the future, maybe get someone else to read over anything sent to the EA or vendor? Also think about how you come over in person. The EA only makes a profit if the sale happens: a higher offer is no use to them if the sale falls through. They are obliged by law to put all offers to the vendor, but they will also be advising the vendor on which potential buyer is the best bet - and that may not be the one offering the most money. You need the EA to be telling the vendor that you are a reliable and organised buyer, with the ability to see the sale through.

WhatFreshHell Thu 28-Feb-19 19:53:55

Agree with PP who advise putting in an offer for the full asking price if it's a house you really love. I have spent a lifetime buying and selling houses, and have never offered under the asking price for anything I really, really want. I would also always choose to sell to a cash buyer, if I had several lined up and none had offered the full price.

I would say, too, OP, that there's no such thing as the perfect house. There are many, many houses which you will be happy in. Learn from this one, but don't think that it's the only house for you.

blue25 Thu 28-Feb-19 19:56:04

The vendor sounds great. Gazumping is horrible. Agree that vendors sometimes want to sell to a particular buyer e.g. No kids, older people

AlexaAmbidextra Thu 28-Feb-19 19:57:03

how upset you are that your agent give you bad advice

But it wasn’t OP’s agent. It was, and always is, the vendors agent.

I’m also a bit hmm at so many on this thread encouraging OP to try to fuck over the people who’ve already had their offer accepted. Presumably they’d all be perfectly fine if it happened to them?

Nomorepies Thu 28-Feb-19 19:57:37

Ah you should have increased your offer straight away! You missed out. Estate Agent acts for the vendor, not you. You shouldn’t have relied on him.

SparkyBlue Thu 28-Feb-19 20:01:57

We lost out on a house as the other buyers had cash and we were getting a mortgage. They went with (in their opinion) the easier option and accepted a lower price but what they felt was a hassle free sale. It's their house they can accept whatever bid they choose.

Treefloof Thu 28-Feb-19 20:03:39

Agree that vendors sometimes want to sell to a particular buyer
e.g. No kids, older people
Yup, we got this house because we offered the exact asking price (the house was worth the offer) and because we are slightly older, with no young children. The street demographic was their concern. I dunno why?

LuckyLou7 Thu 28-Feb-19 20:04:04

When we found the house of our dreams (downsizing to live on the coast) we offered above the asking price - not by much - and made it clear we were cash buyers with no chain. Six weeks later we moved in. That sounds smug and unhelpful, sorry, but if you really want a particular house, don't fanny about with lower than asking price offers if you can afford more. Good luck next time flowers

averystrangeweek Thu 28-Feb-19 20:05:58

It wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if the buyer the vendor has been steered towards chosen just happens to be selling their own house through the very same estate agent. So two lovely lots of commission for them.

reallyanotherone Thu 28-Feb-19 20:13:13

If the ea had passed on the offer though surely they should have told o/p it had been refused to give the o/p the chance to offer higher.

That’s the way it usually goes?

I do suspect the EA has been a bit dodgy as if they want the best price (and therefore bigger commission) they would usually come back for a higher offer.

Unless the accepted offer was in a better position to buy quickly.

O/p, and I do mean this in a nice way, if you do write notes for the door please, please get someone to read it and check grammar and spelling. You’re confusing a lot of words and/or using the wrong tenses- if I had a letter like that I’m afraid I wouldn’t have much confidence in you as a buyer.

YoThePussy Thu 28-Feb-19 20:13:25

Just under two years ago we were selling a house. A couple offered less than we were hoping for and upped their offer when we said no to the first. Their final offer was slightly less than another but because we liked the sound of them we accepted their offer. If the other person had put a note through the door it would have been torn up unread. We treated the couple as we would hope to be treated ourselves.

Heard from them last week, they love our old house and are very happy there. Result in our opinion.

JazzyBBG Thu 28-Feb-19 20:15:08

Put a letter through the door. The estate agent of the people we were buying off was useless and hadn't even passed our offers on. We got the house.

LyingInAFieldOfDaffodils Thu 28-Feb-19 20:16:46

I echo what others are saying. The estate agent is working for the vendor, they are absolutely not working for you. You took a calculated risk putting in a low offer - if you had wanted it that much, you should have gone in higher. I would learn from your mistake

Oysterbabe Thu 28-Feb-19 20:17:17

It could just be that one of the others was in a better position than you. My inlaws just bought a house for 10k less than the other offer on the table because they are cash buyers with no chain.

Alsohuman Thu 28-Feb-19 20:19:49

Amazed at how many people seem to think gazumping is a perfectly fine thing to do. A letter through my door would go straight in the bin.

Houseonahill Thu 28-Feb-19 20:20:12

I was we were.

greendale17 Thu 28-Feb-19 20:20:31

Just accept that you lost out. Don’t put your begging letter through the door. That wouldn’t impress me as a seller

Meandwinealone Thu 28-Feb-19 20:23:37

WTAF did you think would happen.
You’d just start an auction and hopefully win.

Jesus some people

Meandwinealone Thu 28-Feb-19 20:24:29

So you could go up in tiny increments and hopefully save a little bit.
You can do that if it’s not your dream home and you don’t give a shiny shit what happens

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER Thu 28-Feb-19 20:25:12

A lot of sales fall through, so you never know, you might find the EA on the phone in a few weeks, asking whether you're still interested.

But if not, there will always be another house, and the next might be even better.

WhatFreshHell Thu 28-Feb-19 20:26:42

Also agree with @Reallyanotherone. Even if I were prepared to read a note from someone who had failed to offer the asking price for my house, poor spelling and grammar would make it a non-starter for me. If you can't get that right, what else is going to go wrong?

user1474894224 Thu 28-Feb-19 20:28:40

I agree put the letter through the door. You don't have to be cringy. Just how much you love the house, how you had additional funds to spend had you been given the chance to up your offer. The fact you have a MIP and nothing to sell. And should there position change please contact you. EA will go with their own people of they get double commission. So you may not have been represented exactly as you think....

SassitudeandSparkle Thu 28-Feb-19 20:29:00

If the ea had passed on the offer though surely they should have told o/p it had been refused to give the o/p the chance to offer higher.

There were a number of offers from potential buyers for the house, the vendors considered them all at the same time (they had been away and not seen them until they returned) and picked one. The OP offered more, the EA put it to the vendors and it was rejected.

reallyanotherone Thu 28-Feb-19 20:29:20

mazed at how many people seem to think gazumping is a perfectly fine thing to do. A letter through my door would go straight in the bin

On the other hand, if the EA hasn’t been passing on offers, it will make sure the vendors know.

LifeImplosionImminent Thu 28-Feb-19 20:29:21

It's not the end of the world, you will find another house you will love, next time, offer a decent price straight off.

newlyfrugal Thu 28-Feb-19 20:38:14

You're using advice and advise the wrong way round, and that was really difficult to read. Paragraphs and proper sentences are your friend.

Absolutely no need for this kind of shit. It was perfectly readable. If it was confusing for you I suggest you work on your own literacy rather than botching about others. Decency, kindness and knowing when to keep your mouth shut are your friends.

muchprefersummer Thu 28-Feb-19 20:40:47

It's a hard lesson but if you really love a house, you need to offer the full asking price from the beginning. You fell in love with a house, then tried and failed to get a better deal. Unfortunately for you, someone else loved it too and offered higher from the start.

I'm assuming most of the people suggesting gazumping have never been gazumped themselves. Having been gazumped myself, I would never do this to anybody - it's horrible.

TheInvestigator Thu 28-Feb-19 20:44:02

@nelyfrugal

No, it wasn’t, and that’s proven by the fact that everyone replied with “just out your higher offer in now anyway”. And she had actually done that, but the OP is so waffly and incorrect that most people have missed it.

When you’re looking for information or advice, you need to put the problem across in a clear manner.

Kintan Thu 28-Feb-19 20:48:29

Can’t believe the amount of posters advising you to put a note through the door. If I was a vendor that would really annoy me if I’d already said no thanks to your offer. The people whose offer he has accepted may well love the house as much as you do and have a young family too. Think you just need to accept you’ve lost out on this particular house and continue your search for your dream home. Good luck!

Lifecraft Thu 28-Feb-19 20:51:45

Firstly, just because someone gives you advice that turns out to be wrong thing to do, doesn't mean it was bad advice.

I would advise someone not to spend their £5K life savings on scratch cards. If it turns out that a £1m winning ticket would have been in that batch they would have bought, my advice turned out to be the wrong advice. But it was still good advice at the time it was given.

Secondly, never fall in love with a house you hope to buy. That way lies madness.

Jade348 Thu 28-Feb-19 20:53:24

Thank you for your kind message. I did not realise I would be slated for my grammar. X

RamonaQuimbyAge48 Thu 28-Feb-19 20:54:35

Lesson learned. Next time you hear there are multiple offers on the table, put in your best and final offer for consideration. You know now for next time.

Curiousdad18 Thu 28-Feb-19 20:56:34

@xccstatic - I would tend to agree with you. Although some people may think it's unfair estate agents want to ensure the sale goes through so may not always recommend the highest bidder.

Many moons ago I went to buy a new car and couldn't get the time of day from the salesman as I was wearing scruffy hoody and jeans. I have £10k cash to spend but he just wasn't interested as he'd made his mind up I was a timewaster.

soontobefour4 Thu 28-Feb-19 20:58:30

It's always disappointing when you are unsuccessful in buying property and I do get it OP but there are a few lessons for you to take from this one:

1. The estate agent is not there to advise you. Their client is the vendor, not the purchaser. It is the vendor paying the estate agent's fees.

2. You say that you were not given the opportunity to make your highest offer. You had your opportunity when you made your original offer and if the house is as perfect as you say it is, that was the time to put your cards on the table and offer what you think the house is worth and what you can afford.

3. We have no idea of the vendor's circumstances, nor those of the purchaser. The purchaser may we'll be a cash buyer and the vendor might be glad of a quick sale and the money in the bank. Not everyone needs to hold out for the last penny so it's difficult to say whether you would have been successful anyway without knowing the context.

4. Please don't try to gazump the purchasers. They are probably just as desperate for the house as you are and it's nice to hear that the vendor has the good morals to stick to their guns. The best thing you can do is to tell the estate agent that you are disappointed not to have your offer accepted and if anything should go wrong with the sale to make you aware as soon as possible. Then reread no. 2 and go for it!

I know it's rubbish but hopefully you've picked up a few good pieces of advice from your thread. Good luck for next time, there will be other houses!

ErictheGuineaPig Thu 28-Feb-19 21:03:04

Oh God. I feel so stupid. When I sold my last house I never thought to check on the buyers' spelling and grammar abilities. I guess I just got lucky when the sale went through without a hitch. If I ever sell my current house I'll be sure to ask for at least a B in English Language GCSE as a requirement of the sale. God knows what could happen otherwise!

Jade348 Thu 28-Feb-19 21:11:11

Can I just clear some points up:

1) I have never made an offer on a house before so yes I did think the point was to put a starting offer in and work your way up. hmm

2) I have clearly noted on my original post that I will be learning from this. I am not stating I am not reasonable for not putting my full offer in first, but I genuinely did not know that’s how it worked.

3) I did not re-read my post, I came on here for positivity not to be slated for my grammar. It really shows what type of person you are to put somebody down and stating that I would be judged for this- you don’t know me, I wouldn’t dream of sending any letters to an estate agents without proof reading.

4) I won’t be looking to send a letter through the post thank you for the idea however, I feel I need to learn a lesson from this.

Thanks for the advice guys!

Lostthefairytale Thu 28-Feb-19 21:15:01

Paragraphs and proper sentences are your friend

And the award for the most patronising sentence of all time goes to...

KnightError Thu 28-Feb-19 21:19:01

How does someone proof read anything if their spelling and grammar are very poor? Surely you can either spell and punctuate, or you can't? confused

SpringForEver Thu 28-Feb-19 21:24:16

TheInvestigator
You're using advice and advise the wrong way round, and that was really difficult to read. Paragraphs and proper sentences are your friend.

They need to do what their client wants. They got a bunch of offers, they assumed from their experience that it would go to best and final, which is the norm, but the seller chose not too.

The irony of this - using too instead of to. grin

reallyanotherone Thu 28-Feb-19 21:26:30

Many moons ago I went to buy a new car and couldn't get the time of day from the salesman as I was wearing scruffy hoody and jeans. I have £10k cash to spend but he just wasn't interested as he'd made his mind up I was a timewaster

This. I remember walking in to an EA ready to buy my first house. Mortgage agreed, serious first time buyer. This was pre- internet when the only option was physical shops.

So me, in jeans and a t-shirt, it being my day off, aged 22.

Every fucking house, flat and garage in that EA was “sold” or “under offer”. Every single one. The EA did not have one property for sale. They would not take my details for any new properties they may get.

So yes, you get judged. People make snap judgements on your education, earning capability, and whether you are able to afford things.

My mother, back in the 80’s, was often refused credit cards or treated badly by sales assistants because she was widowed. No man to pay it, therefore she couldn’t afford it.

O/p we can only take what we read on face value. You would be utterly shocked at the level of spelling and grammar on official documents- it is not unusual for people to use language like your o/p on official documents. It was not a judgement- i don’t know if you are dyslexic, in a rush or that’s your normal way of writing.

TwoRoundabouts Thu 28-Feb-19 21:27:23

OP the time to put a letter through the door was after your viewing not when you want to put in a higher offer. It actually isn't rare for vendors to choose the people they feel will respect their home, so when viewing if the vendors are present always say nice things unless you absolutely hate the place.

Oakmaiden Thu 28-Feb-19 21:34:20

There will be other houses.

darklady64 Thu 28-Feb-19 21:39:04

I'm glad you're not putting a letter through the door. If I had accepted another offer on my house I would feel honour bound to that. A letter banging on about how much you loved my house (even though you weren't prepared to offer the asking price) would just annoy me, so don't waste your energy. God, this sort of thing is why we've stayed in the same house for 25 years! grin

PtahNeith Thu 28-Feb-19 21:40:02

AIBU isn't really the place for positivity.

JW13 Thu 28-Feb-19 21:41:43

@Jade348 something very similar happened to us 6 years ago and we 'lost' a house that I thought was perfect. I was gutted! This was in London in a really cut-throat market and there weren't many properties around in the area we wanted.

A couple of months later a similar but better house came up and we put in an asking price offer and got it. So I was pretty glad that first house didn't happen for us. Hopefully something similar will happen for you.

PtahNeith Thu 28-Feb-19 21:42:28

Oh, and if this is the second time you've lost out, how is it you've never put an offer in on a house before?

Those two statements appear irreconcilable?

TitsAndTomatoes Thu 28-Feb-19 21:42:52

Another house WILL come along.

Everyone i know has fallen in love with a house, thought it was their dream home, then missed out on it...and found another.
Same thing happened to me. Its not the end of the world.
Id put the higher offer in and get them to submit. If the seller takes it then great. If not...well you'll find another

Alsohuman Thu 28-Feb-19 21:44:06

Will you all stop being so bitchy to OP? All this nitpicking is really getting on my tits.

Jade348 Thu 28-Feb-19 21:47:19

@ptahneith - we lost out the first time as a similar house came up, same area but we was not in a position to put an offer in, as we didn’t have a deposit. Don’t really think I need to explain that. It is a relevant.

Crockof Thu 28-Feb-19 21:52:33

What's for you won't pass you by.

Witchend Thu 28-Feb-19 21:52:34

Just bear in mind that if you put a letter through the door and the vendors decide to go with you, they can equally well be swayed further down the line from someone gazumping you.

AndItStillSaidFourOfTwo Thu 28-Feb-19 21:55:16

OP, tbh I'm intrigued that you see that (your post above re the previous house) as having 'lost out', even though you weren't actually in the 'game' to start with. It's a bit like saying you lost a game of football because you didn't have a ball. It does suggest you might be used to a certain degree of expectation of getting what you want, or difficulty with reconciling to the fact that life doesn't often work like that - a kind of belief that fixating on something means you're entitled to get it? I'm a bit astonished at all the PPs suggesting you write manipulative letters and glad you're not going to. But you might want to think a bit about how you're approaching this.

MonsterKidz Thu 28-Feb-19 22:00:45

Been there, done that here too I’m afraid!

When we were buying our first house, we had numerous episodes of loosing out etc.

Similarly, when we were selling our 3rd property, we had first time buyers offer nearly 40k more than asking just because they were pregnant, had lost out so many times they just wanted to get a house! Other offers were around asking price and those buyers were annoyed at someone going so far over.

It’s a terribly stressful situation. You just need to sit patient and when you find somewhere good, don’t get all loved yo about it, put your best offer forward and then wait and see...

Cel982 Thu 28-Feb-19 22:05:23

OP that's not how it works. You don't put in an offer and then ask the agent to tell you if anyone offers more so that you can raise your offer.

You put in an offer and if it is refused you can raise it. Unfortunately, someone offered more in the first instance and that offer was accepted.

But that is how it works, usually confused If there are multiple bidders on a property, the agent will generally keep them all informed of what the current high bid is, so that they can up their offer. That didn't happen in this situation, as it seemed the vendor just wanted a quick sale, but it is the norm, and I'm not sure why the OP is being slated for expecting it.

SpringForEver Thu 28-Feb-19 22:17:45

Don't forget that sometimes an agent will be selling to a friend or family and not be entirely straight about all offers, going in favour of their friend.

TrainSong Thu 28-Feb-19 22:18:28

I'd drop the vendors a note. Explain that you acted as instructed but were prepared to raise your offer to X. I think it's also worth saying that you know house sales can be complicated and fall through for a number of reasons, and that if this happens please would they get in touch as you would still be keen chain-free buyers. You never know, the buyer mayhave to pull out.

SassitudeandSparkle Thu 28-Feb-19 22:35:13

Ignore anyone swinging the grammar hammer, OP!

I don't think you can count the first house though, if you didn't have a deposit and never put an offer in - no need to view that one as a failure, it was never an option!

The current property - with the owners being away at the time you offered, it seems that they had a number of offers to consider on their return. They picked one and tbh, it is to their credit that they are sticking with it. If they accepted a higher offer from you, then someone came along with a higher offer again - well, they'd go for the higher offer again! Fine to let the EA know that you are keen if the sale falls through for any reason.

Keep looking, it is always stressful.

Ariela Thu 28-Feb-19 22:38:28

If you liked the house and the area, and are ready to proceed (got deposit etc and mortgage approved in principal, then why not drop a note through ALL similar properties in the area and say you're looking to buy and are ready to go, and see what materialises.

Fairenuff Thu 28-Feb-19 22:56:09

Cel982 they don't usually tell you what the other people have offered. They just say there's been a higher bid, to give you the chance to bid more. They shouldn't give a figure. They are working for the vendor and want to get best price.

The other thing to learn from this OP is don't tell the agent that you can offer more. The agent will just tell the vendor. It's their job. No vendor will accept an offer if they already know you are willing to offer more.

Just make an offer on what you are prepared to pay. If it's turned down you can consider offering more if you are able or you can walk away. If the vendor accepts an offer from someone else, that is their right.

Ragnarhairybreetches Fri 01-Mar-19 06:44:12

We were the first to view our house (within a few hours of it going on) first to offer, (full asking price) next viewers did same. Vender chose us as we were first,
Sometimes the EA can't forsee what the seller will go for. They can only advise. I wouldn't blame the EA but next time if you want it so badly and can afford it, go in with a killer offer.

listsandbudgets Fri 01-Mar-19 07:28:01

We didn't accept the top offer on our last sale. We accepted a slightly lower offer from a chain free cash buyer. We wanted to scale quickly and knew they would be best met. Sale went through in 6 weeks beginning to end

LakieLady Fri 01-Mar-19 07:32:42

If you liked the house and the area, and are ready to proceed (got deposit etc and mortgage approved in principal, then why not drop a note through ALL similar properties in the area and say you're looking to buy and are ready to go, and see what materialises.

That's what the people across the road from me did. The leafletted this road and several others nearby.

The elderly lady who lived opposite had not long died and her daughters were her executors. They had a probate valuation done and sold it to the leafletting couple for the amount of the probate valuation, which was around 25% under market value by the time the sale went through.

Great result for my new neighbours, and the executors got a quick hassle-free sale and saved themselves the agents' fees.

Cel982 Fri 01-Mar-19 10:00:53

Cel982 they don't usually tell you what the other people have offered. They just say there's been a higher bid, to give you the chance to bid more. They shouldn't give a figure. They are working for the vendor and want to get best price.

That hasn't been my experience of house-buying. But it's a rapidly rising market where we are, and bidding wars are the norm.

MatildaTheCat Fri 01-Mar-19 10:07:47

For gods sake just get on the phone and offer your maximum price with a date to exchange ASAP. The EA legally has to pass it on. Most vendors will bite if it’s a substantial increase.

The winners may be already at their absolute maximum. It’s not nice to do this but as you are learning it’s not a nice competition and the other offer was only just accepted. Do it now and get back to us. You will kick yourself later if you don’t.

Starch Fri 01-Mar-19 10:10:30

The vendor has already said thanks but no thanks.

Fairenuff Fri 01-Mar-19 10:19:53

That hasn't been my experience of house-buying. But it's a rapidly rising market where we are, and bidding wars are the norm.

Maybe some agents do this but it's not good practice. They shouldn't be showing their hand as it's not in the best interests of the vendor who they represent.

For example if Buyer A offers £300,00 and Buyer B offers £295,000 the agent should tell Buyer B they have received a higher offer.

Buyer B then needs to decide how much they are really prepared to pay, rather than just offer a little more than Buyer A.

If the agent tells them that Buyer A has offered £300,000 Buyer B is not going to go much higher than that.

However, I accept that maybe some agents are not representing their client that well and are treating it more as an open auction.

The trouble with EA is that they are so keen to make the sale that they don't always work for their client. I've known EAs tell a purchaser that they think the vendor will come down on their asking price even before the buyer has made an offer.

MorningRichie Fri 01-Mar-19 10:50:07

Op, when you go to Sainsburys for your groceries, do you make a bid at the till and work your way up closer to the asking price? If not, why not? That's what you've tried to do to the vendor.

I work in an industry where people think it's acceptable to do that and it's annoying in the extreme. If you want it, pay for it.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »