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Am I being a jealous child?

(16 Posts)
WishUponAStarbar Thu 28-Feb-19 00:14:55

Worked at my job on/off almost 5 years (used to work abroad in summer but job here was left open for me to return in winter) I have a very good work ethic, always have and I really like the people I work with (most of) so I will often help them out.
I've stopped going away now as I've had a baby. I returned from maternity beginning of last month and there is a new manager, but she worked in my store when I first started but she wasn't manager, so I know her.
Since being back from maternity, at least twice a week I am asked to either come in early or stay on later than my rota'd shift. 2 weeks ago, I started early and stayed on later every shit (4 in total). I don't mind doing it most of the time, as it means I'm gettin extra money, it also helps the other staff out and I hope that if I'm working a late then they will do the same to help me. I don't moan about it, I don't expect anything other than the favour returned if needed sometime in the future. That's how it's always been.
Tonight, the chef was going to be sent home early as it as so quiet and the manager was going to take over while I stayed out front, he ended up not going home early as he had too many cleaning jobs left to do or something, that's what he said anyway and he was originally rota'd to finish at 10:30pm so no big deal. The manager helped him with his closing down jobs.
I finished up my work and was walking through the kitchen and I overheard the manager and chef talking, chef said "oh thank you that's really nice, but why?" To which she replied "well, you always stay on if we ask and you always help out" I didn't say anything as I didn't want to be rude or nosey. But 10 mins later the chef posted in the group chat that he had been given a bottle of prosecco as he says "because I'm so good at my job"
I'm not usually a jealous person and I don't expect things to be given to me just for staying on or coming in early, a simple thank you is fine with me, but I feel a little sad that everyone else seems to get rewarded for doing extra, yet I have received nothing. Others have stated they have often received things in the past for similar reasons. I thought the manager and I got along, but now I don't really know why I'm not rewarded the same as the others. I spoke with a friend about it and they said maybe because I never say no, they just expect it from me now... But surely this is unfair or am i just over reacting?

JasperKarat Thu 28-Feb-19 01:11:50

You've stayed extra four times? How many hours does the chef work and how many times has he stayed late and could it be over a much longer period of time, given you've only just gone back? When I worked in restaurants everyone worked longer, but when I was working as a junior in the kitchen the hours (60-70) and the heat were really crazy

WishUponAStarbar Thu 28-Feb-19 07:21:53

This particular chef works 2 shifts a week, generally his shifts are only 6.5 hours.
I stayed extra and came in early for every shift last week. They called me everyday asking to come in early, and then when it was time for me to finish it was busy and so they asked me to stay.
But I've been back 2 months now, and I've done so many favours. I also used my KIT days over Christmas to help them out too.
Yeah maybe but it just felt a little like a kick in the teeth, like me doing them favours is not appreciated if they're rewarding others for the same thing.

WishUponAStarbar Thu 28-Feb-19 07:26:54

I've stayed extra or came in early more than 4 times, but I was using last week as an example. I work 4 shifts a week, other weeks its usually that i stay on at least twice.

Foslady Thu 28-Feb-19 07:27:32

If you don’t feel appreciated maybe it’s time to move on then........

Magenta82 Thu 28-Feb-19 07:54:53

Is the chef salaried?

Often front of house are hourly paid and the kitchen is salaried which means that you are being rewarded for staying late with extra pay but he is not.

Horsemenoftheaclopalypse Thu 28-Feb-19 08:16:30

everyone else seems to get rewarded for doing extra, yet I have received nothing.

It’s not everyone, it’s one person.

Cheffing is crap at the best of times and retaining chefs is difficult (in my experience).
The manager may have reasons you aren’t aware of for doing this and tbf you have no idea what the chef’s been doing while you are on maternity
plus it’s a £7 bottle, I just could not get too excited about that.

It sounds like it’s not about the gift but the recognition- ie. you feel undervalued or your efforts go unnoticed.
If you don’t feel appreciated I’d stop going above and beyond and look for a different job...

Bluntness100 Thu 28-Feb-19 08:22:03

Is there a chance you get over time for the hours worked and the chef does not ? Ie you are paid for the extra you do, he is on a set salary?so effectively does the extra time for free?

ferntwist Thu 28-Feb-19 08:23:46

Unfair. You’re right to question this. Can you raise it with a line manager?

WishUponAStarbar Thu 28-Feb-19 09:03:17

No chef is not salaried, I also work in the kitchen though, I do both BOH and FOH. It's not salaried. We're called chefs but it's not really cooking, I work for a pizza chain blush. It doesnt requiire much skill, and also there is always 2 people in the kitchen so that the workload isnt too much. Because I was using my KIT days I have been technically working since end of November. Officially back beginning of Jan though.
The boy is lovely but he doesn't know much, if he's asked to do something he often isn't sure of how to do it and will pass the job onto someone else.
I mean I'm not saying he doesn't deserve anything, it's just that why are certain people gettin praised when others aren't. When the others are generally helping out more.

PinkHeart5914 Thu 28-Feb-19 09:10:33

You don’t know how many times this ‘chef’ stayed late to help out etc when you was on maternity leave. Maybe they have been a massive help for months and months now

Also you get paid a wage for staying late, you’ve not doing it for free are you now?

Just becuase one member of staff gets a head pat, doesn’t mean they all have to have one.

Birdsgottafly Thu 28-Feb-19 09:32:59

Are the people getting the presents male or a mix?

You might be undervalued, my DD nearly left her job because of it, she works in Pizza Hut, but luckily the crap staff and manager went.

I'd advise her to bring it up that you feel taken for granted.

Birdsgottafly Thu 28-Feb-19 09:34:17

"Just becuase one member of staff gets a head pat, doesn’t mean they all have to have one."

If they do the same work, they do.

This is why business lose good staff and go down hill.

WishUponAStarbar Thu 28-Feb-19 09:38:34

@PinkHeart5914 no you're right, not everyone has to have a head pat.
But it's annoying that since being back, even though I have given my availability I am still be asked to come in, last week my duty manager called me to ask me to come in early everyday (and even to come in on my day off) as I was a last resort because the general manager had gone on holiday before fixing rotas in which she hadn't put enough staff on due to it being a school holiday. I arranged child care and helped as much as possible. I had booked last weekend off to visit a friend, when I booked it she agreed it would be fine then when the rotas went up I was put to work. She was away on holiday at the time and told me I had to find cover myself. I couldn't find anyone so had to cancel my plans.

The guy only started mid October, so didn't really do that much while I was away as I've been working since end of November. Like I said, he probably deserves it, he's a lovely guy. But surely it's annoying if not everyone is being rewarded (even just with a bar of chocolate or something). This guy also works the same days as me so I know how much he is working, we talk alot.

Anyway, I'm happy for him. I just wasn't happy that my manager seems to be forgetting the others.

WishUponAStarbar Thu 28-Feb-19 09:42:11

@Birdsgottafly well thinking of it, it's only guys I've seen get rewarded and it's always with alcohol. Another guy about 3 weeks ago got a bottle of cider for staying on on a busy shift. He stayed an extra 5 hours so yeh it was definitley deserved.
Maybe I'll bring it up with her nicely, see what she says

OKBobble Thu 28-Feb-19 11:06:06

Or just refuse to stay late anymore.

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