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No one acknowledged my 60th birthday

(531 Posts)
Radley60 Sun 24-Feb-19 17:04:22

I'm new to this so I hope I'm posting in the right place but I just needed someone to vent to I guess. I just had my 60th birthday. I was looking forward to having a nice day but my family never even acknowledged me. No happy birthday, no gifts, no meal nothing, zilch, zero. I know most people would just say "you're 60 get over it" but I can't stop the tears coming. I just feel so unwanted. My daughter lives abroad so I eagerly checked my email but there was nothing from her. My husband left for work that morning and that was that and my son although he was home, said nothing to me. I stupidly waited all day until my husband came home thinking they would maybe order a meal in for us but no nothing. I was so angry at first, then that changed to tears. I'm on crutches at the moment because of a knee injury so it's not like I could even go out just to get away. I always make sure Christmas and birthdays are celebrated and they never wake up on the morning of their birthdays without cards and gifts and we always go out for a meal. I knew going out was a no go for me this year but I feel like they simply see me as the hired help and not worth bothering with. I'm sorry if I'm rambling and I know it's only a birthday but the lack of any love and affection is really hurting me.

elQuintoConyo Sun 24-Feb-19 17:06:18

That sounds hugely upsetting. A 60th is a big deal, I'm pretty appalled by your husband and DC.

Happy birthday from Spain flowerscakewine

ThroughThickAndThin01 Sun 24-Feb-19 17:07:35

Oh no poor you OP. This is why I keep reminding everyone when my birthday is coming up!

Have they all forgotten, or just ignoring it?

DoorsAndWater Sun 24-Feb-19 17:08:04

I am so sorry that they did that to you, Happy Birthday to you from me smile 60 is to be celebrated! Xxx

HolidayReads Sun 24-Feb-19 17:08:22

@Radley60 the biggest Happy Birthday from me!!

I'm so sorry to read this, it sounds horrible and you must be so hurt. No matter what is going on in their lives, there is little to excuse forgetting your 60th birthday.

I'd book yourself a lovely getaway for when your knee is better - on the husband's card obviously! After all, he owes you 😉

TearingUpMyHeart Sun 24-Feb-19 17:08:50

Is this different to your other birthdays? Did you want to organise something for your 60th but couldn't?

It sounds a bit crap, but then again, I am not massive on birthdays but organise my own milestone event parties. I think a lot of people do, especially by 60!

Aquamarine1029 Sun 24-Feb-19 17:09:07

Oh, op. That is just total shit, and I would be so hurt, too. You should tell them how shit they are.

IWantChocolates Sun 24-Feb-19 17:09:10

That's terrible. Did they not acknowledge it at all? If they didn't even remember that's really horrible of them. Do they have form for forgetting birthdays, like each other's? Did you mention it to them? What did they say?

Happy belated birthday from me!

EatingElephantsIsCF Sun 24-Feb-19 17:09:45

Happy Birthday! Buy yourself something nice .
Next time it is one of theirs spend the money on treating yourself.

PatchworkElmer Sun 24-Feb-19 17:09:52

Oh OP, how awful. YANBU. Have you told them?

Happy Birthday from me flowers

PlasticPatty Sun 24-Feb-19 17:10:24

I'm sorry.

Happy Birthday!

Plan your own happy days in future. Really. Not necessarily leave the bastards in actuality, but set off on your own path quietly, and have as much happiness as you can. Post 60, you deserve it. And so do I.

MrsCasares Sun 24-Feb-19 17:10:57

Happy birthday from me.

That is total shitty behaviour from your family.

PatchworkElmer Sun 24-Feb-19 17:11:03

Also- a lot of my extended family forgot my 30th birthday- we usually make a big fuss for birthdays. I was very hurt and am struggling to muster much enthusiasm to organise anything for theirs now!

AfterSchoolWorry Sun 24-Feb-19 17:11:06

What a shower of ungrateful assholes! Do they know now?

By the way happy birthday OP 🎂🎉🎈

ChakiraChakra Sun 24-Feb-19 17:12:43

That sounds very upsetting. Have a massive happy birthday from me! ❤ flowers

Have you told them?

Confusedbeetle Sun 24-Feb-19 17:12:46

It is sad that they didn't acknowledge it. On the other hand, my family simply refused to believe me that in the first place I couldn't care less about birthdays and in the second, I really really didn't want a fuss. I was not in a good place as a friend had just died, They meant well but I didn't want a houseful of family and a meal. Ungrateful yes, but they weren't listening. 70th in a year and I am keeping it very secret. Homemade cards from the grandchildren or a phone call is lovely though

Smotheroffive Sun 24-Feb-19 17:12:58

flowers chocolate wine Happy Birthday Radley

Time to treat yourself big time for big birthday. How about booking yourself a trip you've always wanted to go on? Or a special treat you always wished for? Think hard and make sure you have something special to mark such a special occasion.

You deserve it!

BlueDotty Sun 24-Feb-19 17:14:11

Happy Birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday dear Radley
Happy birthday to you!

DaphneduM Sun 24-Feb-19 17:14:43

Oh my lovely, that's so hurtful for you. Your family sound very selfish indeed. Basically they all need a good kick up the backside. You sound as though you're too nice. I think I would tell them all, individually, how hurt you are feeling - they should be made aware that they have massively failed you. Do you have a close friend that you could maybe meet for lunch next week? I get that you are not mobile, but maybe get a taxi to the restaurant. I certainly would not let it fester - be assertive and put your needs first.

ILoveBray Sun 24-Feb-19 17:14:54

Hugest happy birthday wishes from me! So sorry your family forgot. It's absolutely horrible to feel like you give and give and give and get nothing back.

Buy yourself a cake, get a bottle of wine and celebrate yourself.

And when it comes to one of their birthdays I would certainly be remembering how they have treated you.....


lottielady Sun 24-Feb-19 17:15:05

Bloody hell, tell them!

That is absolutely crap.

Happy Birthday from me flowers cakewine

GMtoBe Sun 24-Feb-19 17:15:26

OP that's awful, they should be ashamed of themselves.

Happy birthday from me!

Mummadeeze Sun 24-Feb-19 17:16:31

V sorry to hear you are so hurt. In future take ownership of it. Tell your family, it is my 60th birthday coming up and this is how I would like to celebrate. This is what I do. I plan something I would like to do every year so that I don’t feel forgotten or unappreciated. This year I am going to mini golf with my friends and then on a weekend away with my daughter to celebrate my 45th (all planned by me). If I left it up to others, I know I would be disappointed too. It is thoughtless of your family though. Maybe it isn’t too late though. You could say to everyone, I felt a bit rubbish not celebrating my 60th, let’s all get together for a meal or something and make a plan. That would still be nice.

Dyingforchocolate Sun 24-Feb-19 17:16:41

Happy birthday cake flowers
I can understand why you are upset, I would be too.
Agree with pp when you feeling better plan some lovely days out for yourself, you deserve it!

LemonadePockets Sun 24-Feb-19 17:17:01

Happy happy happy birthday from me 🎉🎉🎉

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