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(61 Posts)
Keba123 Sat 23-Feb-19 14:16:30

So I asked my DH if he watches porn this morning
I dunno why just curious I suppose
Plus I've seen it on his phone years ago just wondering if he still does watch it
He said not really
I said well yes or no
He sed well not often
I said ok.
End of convo
I dont really give a shit tbh
But I have this feeling in my mind
Should I care?
He's wanking over skinny hot girls
And I had a baby 4 weeks ago
Like I feel like I should be botherd but I'm just not .....

AlmostAJillSandwich Sat 23-Feb-19 14:18:11

If it doesn't bother you then just be glad it doesn't bother you, plenty of other women would be bothered and hate it, others will be like you and not care.

littledoll33 Sat 23-Feb-19 14:18:59

I think many men watch it. I could be wrong.

If he watches it in secret, (and pretends he doesn't,) that's a bit weird.

GreenWingers Sat 23-Feb-19 14:19:18

It's never bothered me either but everyone feels differently about this. Me and OH did have an open relationship for a while when we were younger so I guess we're quite relaxed about this sort of stuff.

SexNotJenga Sat 23-Feb-19 14:21:12

Did he say he was waking over skinny hot girls? For all you know he could be waking over 50 year old obese men.

But judging by your other thread I think you have bigger problems, tbh.

CoachBombay Sat 23-Feb-19 14:21:54

It's personal preference.

Me and DH spend many weeks apart, I get bored of sending or receiving nudes, there's only so much "phone sex" you can be bothered to do also 😂 so we both use porn in our own time occasionally. DH I'm sure more than me as he has a higher sex drive. So for us it's really a non issue.

Others however don't like it, and it's a discussion both adults in the relationship should have to gauge boundaries and acceptance or dislike of its use.

Keba123 Sat 23-Feb-19 14:21:59

So he obviously watches it secretly as in not in front of me, and the history on his phone is always cleared ( I only know as went to find a holiday site we had been on)
So yes he sort of hides it but then dosent lol
I dunno
I just don't want to be a push over / doormat
But I don't think I give a shit

SexNotJenga Sat 23-Feb-19 14:22:08

*wanking

I clearly have a ladylike auto-correct.

Awwlookatmybabyspider Sat 23-Feb-19 14:22:37

Sorry to say this and albeit maybe subconsciously, but You are bothered or you wouldn't have asked.

Userplusnumbers Sat 23-Feb-19 14:22:41

Unbothered enough to create a thread about it?
Clearly you are bothered, wrapping it up as pretending you're not but wondering if you should be is a bit weird.

Keba123 Sat 23-Feb-19 14:25:35

Mabeys that's what it is
I'm subconsciously botherd by it
As it has played on my mind all morning
But not in a angry way if that makes sence

Tomtontom Sat 23-Feb-19 14:30:06

There aren't many skinny hot girls in porn, if that helps.

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet Sat 23-Feb-19 14:30:15

Do you mean that you don't feel great about it but you don't care enough about him to care what he does? Or that you are just too tired to get upset about it? Or is it more that you know a lot of people would mind, but you personally don't?

I don't think there is a right answer, it's more about what works for you. If it matters to you then it matters. With a 4 week old baby to care for, I think it should probably be let go for now. You have other things to worry about. I can remember making loads of decisions when my children were 4 weeks old, but I don't remember many of them being rational, I was on survival mode only!

lboogy Sat 23-Feb-19 14:34:26

Do t ask questions if you're not prepared for the answer. Also what he does in private is his business not yours

ThatssomebadhatHarry Sat 23-Feb-19 14:37:38

Of course it bothers you or you wouldn’t be taking the time to post.

It’s a dealbreaker for some women others don’t care.

Either way 4 weeks post baby you are feeling exhausted and pretty vulnerable so go easy on yourself.

OftenHangry Sat 23-Feb-19 14:37:51

Nearly everyone watches porn sometimes. 🤷‍♀️

Let me assure you that there is so much choice that you really don't need to worry about him wanking off over skinny hot girls.

Here you have some pornhub numbers from their yearly review.

OftenHangry Sat 23-Feb-19 14:38:46

Damn. Pic went all blurry. Here is a link www.pornhub.com/insights/2018-year-in-review

Cremeeggsareforever Sat 23-Feb-19 14:42:12

It sounds like you do care or you wouldn't have posted. Talk to him about it.

PooleySpooley Sat 23-Feb-19 14:44:36

My OH does and I don’t care as long as it’s not when I am around.

stopitandtidyupp Sat 23-Feb-19 14:47:11

It would really bother me. I would rather be single than have a porn loving man.

littledoll33 Sat 23-Feb-19 14:49:32

@SexNotJenga I think I'd be a lot more bothered if my DH was wanking over 50 y.o. obese men, than young skinny women! grin

ifoundthebread Sat 23-Feb-19 14:51:35

My dp is similar to yours. If I ask him out straight he'd give an answer of the same nature. If I sit and think about It and what videos he could be watching etc then it starts annoying me, then I remind myself that it doesn't impact our relationship at all, so then I forget about it.

He also 'hides' it by deleting his history and doing it in private, but I do the same. We both know each other watch it but doesn't cause an issue.

Keba123 Sat 23-Feb-19 15:13:13

@ifoundthebread
Sounds like the way forward
It dosnet effect our relationship
Think I will just forget about it!

ifoundthebread Sat 23-Feb-19 17:15:50

@keba123 that's my way of thinking, what he does in his spare time is up to him and makes no difference to me. As long as I can still be satisfied when required then I have no issues ☺

greenjumper3 Sat 23-Feb-19 17:38:42

So you are happy for your partners to get off on looking at other women?

Not to mention the ethics of porn.

Hope they are proud of themselves.

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