To be worrying now about our holiday

[sillymillie]

More of a WWYD. Have booked a family holiday end of August, paid a deposit and a lot of money to reserve exit seats on the plane which DH likes. Package so far includes flights and one hotel but need to book another separately for second week.

DS is in first year at university. I checked with him ages ago that he would be free in August and he said yes. Now he tells me that if he fails any of his exams in May the retakes will be exactly when our holiday is. This seems very unlikely as he's doing well and he passed first set of exams easily. The next exams are more of the same modules he's just taken.

He's not at all worried but I am!

I don't have to pay the balance of the holiday until after his results. So worst case scenario is that he has to resit, we don't go and we lose deposit and seat reservation costs. Have checked insurance and it covered for reasons like this. Not that I thought it would!

I think I should wait until after his results to book second hotel.

WWYD?

[reallybadidea]

Would you not just go without him if he fails and needs to resit?

[DisplayPurposesOnly]

Tell DS to work hard and pass his exams, as you'll be going without him otherwise!

[ZenNudist]

Hes an adult. Go without him

[showmethegin]

Agree with pp, if he has to resit he can't go, I don't see why the rest of you can't though? He must be at least 18 if he is at uni?!

[sillymillie]

I don't think we'd go without him if I'm honest!

[PotteringAlong]

Why on earth wouldn’t you go without him? In the nicest possible way, get a grip.

[reallybadidea]

Why on earth not?! Why should the rest of the family miss out because he failed his exams, that wouldn't be fair on them!

[Foodylicious]

If you are not too worried about the 2nd hotel then I would wait to book it too.

Is there a chance that everywhere might be booked though?

[MynameisJune]

He’s at least 18, tell him you’re going without him. I’m actually surprised he even wants a family holiday. Maybe he’s actually just looking for an excuse not to go.

[Foodylicious]

Oh, when does he get the results?

[Dieu]

I echo the others. 100% go without him. We can't live our lives around our children forever!

[sillymillie]

Results early June I think.

I know, I need to get a grip but was so excited about this booking and now am fucked off.

[Pk37]

Have you though he may not actually want to go?
My ds is also in his first year and he’s chosen to stay home as he wants to revise , get a summer job and plan a holiday with his new uni friends and catch up with the old ones .
Could it be that he’s agreed and now has changed his mind ?

[Lazypuppy]

As if you would cancel your entire holiday because your son, who is an adult, fails some exams. This is his motivation, if he doesn't pass, he doesn't get a holiday. Simple.

[woolduvet]

Yep I'd go without him. He's at uni, left home etc.

[reallybadidea]

I don't think I know anybody who failed their first year exams. He'll be fine, stop worrying and book that hotel!

[ZenNudist]

You need to get used to going on holiday without him

[DisplayPurposesOnly]

Two grips needed:

• you're worrying about something that hasn't happened and there's no reason to think will happen
  
  
• you really can go on holiday without him.
  
  

[sillymillie]

Oh he definitely wants to go. Unless he's doing a good job pretending. In which case if he fails his exams he might stand a chance at RADA. 🤣

[sillymillie]

Also as stupid parents are paying

[sillymillie]

Thanks everyone!

[Sophiesdog11]

Why on earth wouldn’t you go without him? In the nicest possible way, get a grip.

This, exactly. What would you have done if he was going away with mates? I think having DC join you on hols after 18 is a bonus, you shouldn’t expect it to happen (mine are almost 19 and 21 and still happy to join us most of time but fine if they don’t)

I have a DS who has done 2yrs at uni, one of his school contemporaries has scraped both years despite being an A* student, his mum would have no qualms about going without him.

DS friend had re-sits last year, he had to come straight back from a summer placement abroad for them, instead of travelling with others. I am sure he learned a valuable lesson from it ready for his final year.

It sounds like this will be a non-issue anyway, if he is working and passed first lot of exams. Just book the hotel, tell him to keep working so he doesn’t have to miss his holiday, and go without him if he fails.

[Waveysnail]

Of course u go without him. I never went on holiday with parents when I started uni. I encouraged them to go when it was cheap then I went with bf or mates

[BlueCornishPixie]

He probably won't fail. Especially not with the incentive of a holiday. It's also highly unlikely that he'd fail all the exams, so there's a good chance he would be able to come after remakes worst case scenario.

He's in his first year of uni, your going to have to get used to going without him. No point wasting the whole holiday. Don't worry about it.

[uggmum]

We had that scenario last year. We had booked a villa and flights well in advance and were unaware of exam resits.
My dd failed one exam and had to resit halfway through our holiday.
She missed a week of the holiday and we had to buy a new flight