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Late/inconsistent maintenance payments.

(6 Posts)
JKCR2017 Fri 22-Feb-19 12:15:29

Hi all, I have DS 8 with my ex. We split when he was very very tiny. We agreed that he would pay me a certain amount of maintenance each week. He was really good at paying for a while, but it was a bit hit and miss as he’s very self centred with money and new girlfriends etc. At the time I was a single parent so I did rely on it so I ended up going through the csa...

As many parents who have dealt with the csa in the last few years might know that the csa service is changing into the new system (I’m not sure what it is exactly). When we had the letter about our csa claim stopping, I was keen to use the new service as I knew how inconsistent my ex was but he didn’t want to be charged for this so told me that he wanted us to make our own arrangements to avoid this. I was unsure at first but decided to give him the benefit of the doubt.

A year or to has gone by. We arranged a date each month end transfer me the maintenance. For several months it was fine, but slowly and surely it’s late, inconsistent etc etc.

I’m no longer a single parent snd not struggling as such but the money is very handy. He only has DS for a few hours a week (ex’s choice to have him for that little time, I have encouraged him to have him for longer with no luck) and it’s not like he has to spend much on him when he has him.

My ex also earns considerably more than he did 8 years ago. Should he be paying more? I don’t expect it nor ask for it but he doesn’t pay a lot compared to what I hear other non resident parents have to pay.

Sorry I am babbling, I don’t like to ask for the money and never have but it’s late and it’s half term so naturally have spent more entertaining DS and it would be handy. Would you politely remind him it’s due or wait it out?

If it carries on I will consider using the new child maintenance system even if we do both get charged for doing so.

Angrybird123 Fri 22-Feb-19 12:46:23

Just go through CMS.. Its a tiny charge and worth it for taking all the potential conflict etc out of the equation. Never mind what he would prefer.. Give him a list of all late and reduced payments to show why you won't put up with him buggering about any more.

Sirzy Fri 22-Feb-19 12:48:51

Even with the direct pay if he isn’t paying enough or on time they will chase him up and change it to taking from his wages. Phone them up and let them deal with it.

ElsieMc Fri 22-Feb-19 12:57:43

I have had this for many years op. You will have to make a one off payment of £20; I didnt because I had to have a panic alarm placed in the house by the police.

The CMS will not put him on collect and pay straight away because they will give him chance to make payments. You can register with CMS, allow them to work out the correct amount of maintenance but then pass on your bank details through them. You must tell them (the onus is on you) if he fails to pay. If he carries on letting your child down then they will put him onto collect and pay. It can be taken out of your hands, it was in my case.

This means he pays the money to them, which they then pass on to you so of course it takes longer. They charge you 4% for this and obviously it is wrong that you are penalised for his failure to pay. However, he has to pay (I think) 20% on top of the payment he makes. He will not like that at all and it will concentrate his mind.

I also had my gs's dad move onto high paid employment whilst he insisted he earned very little. I did not have sufficient evidence to win the mandatory reconsideration at the time, but CMS handed it to their fraud team. It took ages to sort out (8 months) and there has to be a 25% upturn for a change. In fact there was a 100% upturn and it was backdated for the eight months.

Do move things to CMS. They are not good, please dont think they are, but sadly they are all we have got. Good luck.

Thehop Fri 22-Feb-19 13:05:11

Pay the £20 and go through cams it’s been brilliant for me and changes with income automatically so you know you’re getting a fair amount.

JK2012 Fri 22-Feb-19 13:45:01

Thanks all. I have little knowledge of the cms, so thanks for the helpful advice.

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