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My bf cried and I don't know what to think

(160 Posts)
StreetwiseHercules Fri 22-Feb-19 12:16:10

“how he can be a third kid for me to look after, that he wants to be taken care of financially.”

What a weirdo thing to say. And crying is just hysterics to try to make you do what he wants.

AllTheFours44 Fri 22-Feb-19 12:15:27

I bet he was deadly serious. From the wanting to be looked after, the desire to be treated as your third child and the prolonged crying (wtf?!); it all screams manchild.

Run for the hills, OP.

Shamoogren Fri 22-Feb-19 12:15:13

But yes I am wary of any cocklodger type thing

Shamoogren Fri 22-Feb-19 12:14:49

To be fair on him, he has a job he works hard and he is very lovely to me , always pays his way

bingoitsadingo Fri 22-Feb-19 12:14:48

He has been making a few hints about living together 'one day', how he can be a third kid for me to look after, that he wants to be taken care of financially.

Sounds like you've dodged a bullet there, tbh.
The beauty of children is that they grow up. Can't imagine anything worse than a man-child who doesn't want to!

SpongeBobJudgeyPants Fri 22-Feb-19 12:14:10

That was an extreme reaction on his part. Not sure whether he was trying to guilt you, or he's just very needy?

WhenISnappedAndFarted Fri 22-Feb-19 12:13:11

Cross post.

Why don't you think he's being serious? Why would he just say that?

WhenISnappedAndFarted Fri 22-Feb-19 12:12:37

You're feeling bad because he said that he wants you to basically provide everything - he wants you to financially look after him and he wants to be a third kid - he wants you to do everything for him.

YANBU. Run.

Shamoogren Fri 22-Feb-19 12:11:31

Sorry , hints / jokes I don't think he was serious about the looking after or the finances

Shamoogren Fri 22-Feb-19 12:10:33

I'm 4 years separated from a very difficult/ abusive marriage. Lone parent to 2 dc. Met bf at a party around 8 months ago and we have got on really well since.

I know in my heart of hearts that I don't want to live with anyone or integrate my life until the DC are older ie over 18. I don't think it would be in my DC best interests for lots of reasons including the possibility of it ending in tears and them going through that. I also cannot afford or cope with anymore children.

I have always told bf that if he wants kids (he is younger) I am not the woman for him as I absolutely do not want any more.

He has been making a few hints about living together 'one day', how he can be a third kid for me to look after, that he wants to be taken care of financially. Ive laughed it off but I thought I should really make it totally transparent that I am not available at all for cohabiting, blending or family life in any way, including financially. So I brought it up with him, nicely, explained of course I adored him and if he'd be happy with what I can offer then great but if not id get it if he didn't feel we wanted the same things. and he broke down and cried for about an hour. I felt awful.
Am I unreasonable for feeling this way?
Im not sure I understand why he was so upset as I wasn't saying I didn't want to be with him, just that the relationship would need to continue as is. Help.

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