I work in a professional services company. On a night out with clients in 2017 in talking about #metoo, one male client in his 50s got verbally aggressive with me, saying things like - women who are raped were probably asking for it/were lying etc. We had a big argument and it was awful.
I was raped over 10 years ago and his attitude and hostility were very distressing and triggering. He’s an important client however so my boss told me to let it pass and carry on working with the client, which I have. I also started seeing a psychotherapist after that incident but stopped in mid 2018 because it was too traumatic to keep going over stuff.
I try to limit contact with this client and arrange meetings with plenty of notice so I can mentally prepare. He’s generally aggressive and combative in his demeanour with us, so I tend to go in after having visualised several scenarios and how I would deal with them.
Yesterday he came to our office unannounced and wanted a meeting, he was deliberately baiting me about the quality of some work I had done. I got through the meeting and the rest of the day but was up much of the night crying. It surfaces a lot of stuff from the past - his aggression and my memories of being attacked seem somehow to be linked now.
I sent a message to my boss saying I can’t work with this client any more. Boss says it would cause massive resource issues and can I push on through for the good of the business.
I don’t know if I’m being unreasonable to hold my ground. I can’t deal with the constant threat of reliving everything every time this client is an arsehole.
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AIBU?
To say this to boss?
20 replies
WobbleHead · 22/02/2019 09:00
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