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To be annoyed with friend

(41 Posts)
Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 22:57:56

So I have sorted a long weekend away with friends. It is a Friday to Monday break some 4 hours away. I am driving friend A and friend B.
So in order to make the best of it I have paid for breakfast club for dd3 so we can get on the road early.
Friend A is nearly pensionable age but still has appointments at the job centre. I initially thought that she would explain that she was having a short break and woul rearrange signing on for her return. She didn't want to do this so I agreed that I would drive her to job centre reroute if she could get first appointment. We would be being an hour but still a slight head start so ok. She has now been stressing about what to tell job centre. This is now sorted and all ok.
However today she told me that she was now claiming a small company pension so was no longer actually receiving JSA as the pension was slightly higher.
I was a bit wtf at this moment as I didn't really understand why there was all this angst about the Job centre when she is not receiving any money and officially retires early June anyway. Apparently she wanted to preserve her NI record and still attend some training they offer.
So really my AIBU is to think that it should be possible to just tell job centre that you are going away for a weekend when you will receive a state pension soon and aren't actually receiving JSA anyway.

WheresTheEvidence Thu 21-Feb-19 23:02:46

You can't just tell the job centre;
you're not attending an appointment because of a break
that you want an earlier appointment
that the appointment they schedule you is inconvenient


MightyAtlantic Thu 21-Feb-19 23:03:48

Have you ever actually had to deal with the JobCentre yourself? They are very inflexible, you can't "just tell" them anything. Sounds like your friend has valid reasons to attend her appointment, and she's lucky she could rearrange it to fit in with your travel plans.

PurpleDaisies Thu 21-Feb-19 23:04:41

Have you ever had to deal with the job centre? hmm

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:04:44

Accorfing to my friend you are allowed holiday but my point was really why continue to sign on if you don't receive any money.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Thu 21-Feb-19 23:05:13

It’s not like rescheduling a dentist appointment, you don’t just ‘tell the job centre’ you’re going away. You have to attend, simple.

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:11:35

A quick Google shows you are allowed two weeks holiday whilst on JSA.
I suppose I just don't understand why she would to carry on having the hassle of attending the job centre when there is no financial gain bar a few months NI which I can't imagine would matter that much at this late stage.
The training is about an hour every couple of weeks. I kind of get that bit but I am sure other training opportunities exist which avoid the need to carry on with the hassle and expense of signing on.
Anyway I haven't said anything to friend or made a fuss so I will just accept that Iabu.

talktoo Thu 21-Feb-19 23:12:26

I have no experience of job centres. Please tell me why you can't tell them you are going to be away. What happens if you are unwell? What is going on that you can't postpone. What will they do to you???

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:15:18

I know that you still havd to fill out a form but I really feel that the Job Centre shouldn't make a fuss given that she is close to retirement and isn't receiving any money.

MightyAtlantic Thu 21-Feb-19 23:16:26

talktoo You don't get your JSA paid if you miss an appointment. I had to miss signing on because I was going to an interview, and I had to show proof and fill in a form so I could still get the money.

Aridane Thu 21-Feb-19 23:19:01


Whynham Thu 21-Feb-19 23:20:13

You're right, job centres don't make a fuss they just struck you off and sanction you of any monies for 12 weeks without a song n dance about it.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Thu 21-Feb-19 23:20:40

Friends like you annoy me. She’s told you she has an appointment she can’t rearrrange, you agree to wait and are now googling behind her back about the reasons ‘whyyyyyy’ she can/can’t rearrange. I have friends that pull this sort of shit and I avoid giving details now because they always come up with solution I don’t want.

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:22:50

Whynham she does not receive money for JSA as she has a company pension.

CSIblonde Thu 21-Feb-19 23:27:20

You miss the appointment they stop your money & your claim, it's called 'sanctioning' . They don't accept any excuse in my experience. And it can take weeks to appeal & get claim restarted.

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:28:20

I didn't Google until I was told on this thread that you cannot rearrange appointments.
I also agree to wait and that would have been. the end of it but she asked me to help her come up with a reason to move her appointment from the afternoon to the the morning. Even at this stage I would have just let it go. The thing that I suppose led to me to question it was the fact that all of this angst was not due to fear of being sanctioned or having the payment delayed. I believe that is what happens when you have a holiday as she is no longer in receipt of JSA.

AuntieOxident Thu 21-Feb-19 23:28:22

If she is worried about missing NI contributions she can always make voluntary ones - it’s not much, was about £6 a week several years ago.

PrestonsFlowers Thu 21-Feb-19 23:28:56

It's the NI contributions she will be worried about. Even at this stage they will still make a difference. Many older women have had their pension entitlement date moved by years. And there is nothing they can do about it.
YABVVU and incredibly ageist

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:30:10

My friend does not receive JSA so sanctions are not applicable in this case.

LimeKiwi Thu 21-Feb-19 23:32:40

YABU. Have you ever had to deal with a Job Centre?
I did years ago. You can't just tell them that you can't attend one week, you have to attend it if you don't want your money stopping and loads of hassle.

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:33:23

preston I know that has happened and I have always been very angry on her part about this. The last few years have been hard for her on JSA and I have helped her loads. However I am sure that since she started work at 16 and is now 65 than her NI will be enough to get a full pension.

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:35:21

After all you only need 35 years I believe.

cheesemongery Thu 21-Feb-19 23:36:10


You've clearly never been in the situation of the job centre - their rules - tough shit.

Yes you can take a signing break for holiday, but that would have never been dealt with in time, you also have to - in my experience - provide proof of where you are going, receipts of the stay and fuck knows what else.

To live daily with the fear that your fucking £70 a week could be revoked at any minute on a whim, and then you could be investigated before it is revoked... yada yada is terrifying when you have nothing else.

I'm not daft by any stretch of the imagination, but I had to sign on to say I was job seeking whilst homeless with 2 children and signed off sick by my gp (ESA said no).

Your life is being ruled by the state, so again YABU.

Have a lovely holiday though - sincerely.

Footloose80 Thu 21-Feb-19 23:37:57

I understand that dealing with the job centre is shit so that is why I cannot understand why friend would want to carrying on dealing with this crap for no gain.

PurpleDaisies Thu 21-Feb-19 23:39:53

It isn’t “no gain” to her. There’s the NI contribution and training.

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