Schools method of discipline AIBU(267 Posts)
MNHQ have commented on this thread.
Not sure if I'm being precious but I'm sure I'll be told either way now. Found out today that DC's school discipline naughty children by sending them to another class to sit on a chair.
My thoughts are this is worse than a telling off as they are actively showing the other children 'look at this naughty child' and humiliating them. This happens as young as reception. At least if they are sent to the head they get a telling off and that's more or less the end of it. It feels a bit like the village stocks or a public flogging. AIBU to think this is a bit off? For reference the school is in a really good catchment and the naughty kids of whom I know a few seem quite mildly naughty tbh.
I'm not talking about teenagers here, kids who are the same height as a teacher, who can swear like troopers and know their rights. I'm talking about little children
I once had a nursery child say ‘fuck you you cunt. You can’t tell me what to do’.
Little wonder we have kids growing up to be very entitled and snowflakey these days if there are genuinely some parents who think sending a kid into another classroom for a bit is a terrible punishment akin to public flogging. Oh dear lord.
I remember my Gran telling me that if my Dad or one of my Aunties came home from school and told her they had got into trouble at school - they got another row at home for behaving in a manner that led to them getting into trouble in the first place...
Youngest ds got sent out in reception class and at the time I remember feeling it was very harsh. However I now totally understand why the teacher has to have absolute boundaries from day one. She could see it had really upset him but she had to follow through with the consequences which had been said. He had several warnings. This was for talking during carpet time. For an impulsive 4 yr old, yes it was tough but he learnt from it and several years went by before it was necessary again.
In short, I understand your feelings but yabu.
If a child threw a snowball at me, I’d say, “don’t throw snowballs because it isn’t very nice to be hit with one”. Not sure why further punishment was needed!
Because it doesn't work.
the humiliation of sitting with year 1 children and they soon learn
Openly admitting to using humiliation to punish!
They did this when I was at High School (I left in 2007). I once once removed
after a million warnings that I ignored for talking and sent to sit in first year class. Being 16/17 and having a load of 12 year olds giggling at you as you slope to the back of the room with a book ensures you don't do it again!
First off I am a teacher and the school where I work using Parking very successfully to manage behavior.
there are LSAs in the classroom
The role is in the title, they are there to support learning. If a child is acting out for some reason then they are not usually in a great place to learn. Therefore sending the child out to a calm safe space while the LSA's support the other children who are ready to learn but need support to access the curriculum is a far better use of additional adults.
When the LSA gives all their attention to the disruptive child all it teaches that child is that inappropriate behavior is rewarded with extra adult attention.
Well it's better than what they did at my ds school when a child in the class became violent. They removed the rest of the class and left him throwing chairs and scissors around the room (scissors had been aimed at one child's head). I know it was necessary for the rest of the children to be removed for safety reasons, but surely it shouldn't be getting to that stage in the first place.
Our school uses it and it's kids are not humiliated or embarrassed. Especially reception age kids. They go to another class and sit at a desk, usually with colouring page or a book. Let's everyone calm down.
Time out is not an effective behaviour management technique for long term change. Especially for young children. It’s dated and is just what has always been done. It’s often the same children sent out and that in itself shows its lack of effectiveness.
...and it's not the 4/5 year old who needs to say how the behaviour technique benefits them, that's kind of irrelevant. All they need to know is that it's done to help, with respect for them as well as the whole class.
@TildaTurnip We'll have to agree to disagree - I think it very much is restorative. It allows the child distance from an escalating situation, and a new environment in which to calm down. It allows their fight-or-flight response to lessen, and then a proper chat about what happened can be had. It can restore calm, both for the child who is showing negative behaviours and for the children trying to learn. It's not the only thing that's restorative, but I think a change of adult and environment can absolutely be restorative rather than punitive.
There are many 4/5 year olds that would not be able to say exactly what sitting in a different room was doing to change their behaviour or teach them. It’s not restorative or shown to have long term success as a behaviour management technique.
the naughty kids of whom I know a few seem quite mildly naughty tbh.
You seem to have labelled some children as the naughty children - how did you come to this conclusion?
The teachers send the child from the class because their behaviour is inappropriate.
TildaTurnip Wed 20-Feb-19 13:37:11
I disagree. It allows resentment and confusion to grow.
I get resentment but what confusion?
@TildaTurnip not if it's followed up with a discussion. At any age.
Parking/Exiting/RTL/isolation forces the student who misbehaved to consider their chosen actions (and subsequent consequences) without any distractions.
I disagree. It allows resentment and confusion to grow.
I'm guessing school has a policy of not throwing things at teachers (and most likely other things too). It will be based on not causing harm. A stone inadvertently caught up in a snowball could have serious consequences - FWIW I hate snowball fights.
It is a rule of the school which has been broken therefore there are rightly consequences. say there is 200 kids in the school, what if they all decided to throw a snowball at the teacher - quite frankly the child needed telling off. If some random child in the street did this to me I would also tell them off.
Quite frankly OP if your kids are so perfect, surely you are supportive of their classroom being kept in the best possible state for them to fulfil their no doubt genius potential by removing the disruptive ones.
Just as a matter of interest, how would YOU discipline a consistently disruptive child so as not to wreck the educational experiences of the other 29 kids in the classroom? I presume with your wonderful knowledge on how to control a class of 4/5 year olds you are taking up a PGCE this September to pass on your wonderful skills - after all you have brought up such marvellous kids.
PS not a teacher - just can spot "that parent" a mile off
(He doesn't really "get" consequences but it's still effective in diffusing the situation).
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