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To think friend should not see this man again because of his opinion of Freddie Mercury?!

(89 Posts)
RescueRemedy21 Mon 18-Feb-19 19:37:36

Ok, so my friend asked me to post this after a conversation today about her date last night.

Third date, so far everything ok. Last night they got talking about music (she Loves Queen) and he basically said the following:
* Freddie was ugly! (How fucking dare he!)
* That the music is so-so!
* That it's a shame Freddie was gay otherwise he would still be alive
* That friend was wrong to let her 11 year old watch Bohemian Rhapsody because of the references to homosexuality
* He admitted to making awful jokes about Freddie when he died relating to his sexuality, but also admitted he realises it was bad taste now
* That friend was unusual to raise daughter from a young age being aware that people just love people and gender is no issue.

I think the later comments regarding sexuality show real intolerance and ignorance, friend agrees but says other than this he is fine so should she stop seeing him based on these opinions?

AGHHHH Mon 18-Feb-19 19:43:11

These wouldn't bother me:

* Freddie was ugly! (How fucking dare he!)
* That the music is so-so!

These would:

* That it's a shame Freddie was gay otherwise he would still be alive
* That friend was wrong to let her 11 year old watch Bohemian Rhapsody because of the references to homosexuality
* He admitted to making awful jokes about Freddie when he died relating to his sexuality, but also admitted he realises it was bad taste now
* That friend was unusual to raise daughter from a young age being aware that people just love people and gender is no issue.

Tosser

SmashedMug Mon 18-Feb-19 19:44:36

Depends if friend excuses homophobia or not. He sounds awful.

MrsTommyBanks Mon 18-Feb-19 19:45:26

What AGHHHH said.

formerbabe Mon 18-Feb-19 19:48:38

What an unusual topic of conversation for a first date confused

Theworldisfullofgs Mon 18-Feb-19 19:50:16

Would be no more dates for me.

He also sounds like hed lack any insight.

HollowTalk Mon 18-Feb-19 19:52:11

I wouldn't have lasted long in that conversation.

AuntMarch Mon 18-Feb-19 19:53:01

The music is so-so.

But as much as everyone is entitled to their opinion, I'd be of the opinion I wouldn't want to date someone who thinks I'm wrong for raising my child to be respectful and accepting of others.

RescueRemedy21 Mon 18-Feb-19 19:55:48

@formerbabe as in op, it was the third date. I think music tastes are quite a normal topic?!

Ellisandra Mon 18-Feb-19 19:56:23

My question to myself wouldn’t have been “should I see him again?” but “should I leave right now calling him an arsehole, or from a personal safety point of view shall I finish this ASAP then just send him the sorry-no-spark text?”

formerbabe Mon 18-Feb-19 19:57:25

Sorry, totally missed it was the third date! Yes, I suppose music is a fairly normal topic...

Ellisandra Mon 18-Feb-19 19:59:31

In context, I could understand the “shame he was gay” comment - because he certainly at that time was far more likely to have become HIV+ because he was gay. I could even see a context where the last comment isn’t offensive - it can be read as a comment of surprise not judgement.

The thing that totally puts him in squarely in the arsehole-don’t-date camp (no pun intended wink) is suggesting that an 11yo shouldn’t watch it because it contains homosexuality. And?

cheminotte Mon 18-Feb-19 20:01:02

Different taste in music? Doesn’t matter.
Different opinion on sexuality / equality/ how to raise tolerant kids? A lot more worrying.

RUOKHUN Mon 18-Feb-19 20:05:49

Freddie Mercury is a red herring though, because, let’s be honest, the guy is homophobic.

Hunter037 Mon 18-Feb-19 20:08:11

I wouldn't be seeing him again.

Having a conversation about music tastes is fine for a third date. Homophobic comments and jokes about HIV are not appropriate for a third date or ever. I would ditch him.

Springwalk Mon 18-Feb-19 20:10:02

He is homophobic so no not the best choice although I agree about Freddy not being esp handsome and the music.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Mon 18-Feb-19 20:10:31

Every time I hear Freddie's name mentioned, my stomach does a dive. I miss his extraordinary talent and his charisma. We won't see one like him again. sad

Yep, that bloke is a homophic non-entity and nothing he says matters.

Purplecatshopaholic Mon 18-Feb-19 20:10:37

The guy is clearly homophobic, nothing to do with Queen or FM. Defo not a Keeper in my view

Bluntness100 Mon 18-Feb-19 20:10:57

I couldn't be involved with a homophobe, no more than I could be involved with a racist, so for me I'd end it. I'd wonder about your friend if she continued to see a person she knew was homophobic.

LadyHardy Mon 18-Feb-19 20:12:28

Doesn't sound like a very nice guy. He's a massive homophobe and Freddie Mercury just happend to be his target in that instance. I bet if she seems him a few more times she'll hear other telling comments and most likely not just about homosexuals either. I personally wouldn't give him the time of day.

Mummyoflittledragon Mon 18-Feb-19 20:13:01

I agree with AGHHHH
The first two comments are preference. The rest horrid.

Lovingbenidorm Mon 18-Feb-19 20:16:28

He sounds like a real prince 😏

Blueberrybell Mon 18-Feb-19 20:22:25

I’d run for the hills - IME homophobic’s tend to also be racist, sexist, all kinds of intolerant. Same sort of mindset and bigotry. He’s sounds like a complete twat.

NunoGoncalves Mon 18-Feb-19 20:23:32

I wouldn't go out with a bigot so that's an easy no from me.

TotHappy Mon 18-Feb-19 20:26:13

The homophobia is a general red flag... Esp the fact he sounds so confident to raise it on a third date - like he doesn't even know it's not socially acceptable?!
The Freddie bashing is a particular red flag - for your friend and would be for me. Guy is a legend!

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