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Aibu to be pissed parents have no life insurance

(315 Posts)
pregnantforever Sat 16-Feb-19 13:42:49

Parents are in their 50s although my dad has the health of a 70year old. They don't take care of themselves and my dad moans every day about how awful his health is but rarely does anything about it.
He makes stupid decisions that are unsafe. Hes self employed and works lots of hours (manual job) with no need to (mortgage free, own their own car, have savings ect). He seems to almost brag about it. Last week sat saying he had had to work in the dark all day in a house where there was no light or electric, in the freezing cold with leaking water everywhere. We all pointed out that he had done this by choice, he's self employed and it's not worth risking his life for, he could have waited until the next day when some of those issues were sorted out but he didn't want to. We said we thought he was irresponsible and he walked off in a big mood.
I told my mum I hoped they had good life insurance if he was going to carry on making stupid decisions like that because she will be left growing old by herself, and she said they had none, and that there was no point in getting any because it would be expensive and their house was paid off anyway.
I don't think owning a house means much. If one of them needs care they will be up shit creek without a paddle. They both insist they want to stay in that house and never go into a care home ect, and my brother won't have anything to do with looking after them, he's not inclined like that. I have a spinal cord injury and don't want all of the burden of taking care of them or one of them being forced to sell up to pay for their care. Surely if they had life insurance then that would at least cover some costs should one of them take a turn? Or do I just need to keep my nose out massively and not worry? I've never asked anything about it before so had no idea they didn't have it.

BrexitIsComing Sat 16-Feb-19 13:48:05

When one of them dies, how will they pay for the funeral? Have they got funeral cover?
How will they pay for any care / cleaner they may need as they get older?

They need to consider these things. You cannot, & your brother apparently will not, sort them out.

CoolJule43 Sat 16-Feb-19 15:36:43

They have savings so presumably that would pay for funeral costs. Otherwise they could just take out either an over 50s plan or a funeral plan with their intended Funeral Directors.

In terms of needing care, if one had to go into a care home and the other remained in their home, there would be costs to pay. Presumably this would be met either from savings, from family contributing or they could release equity in the house.

There is a cap on costs for care homes for over 65s of £72k from April 2020 but don't know how under that age are affected.

Rade Sat 16-Feb-19 15:39:43

Why on earth would you have life insurance if you have no mortgage? They presumably have some savings?
DH and I don't have it, house is paid off, children grown up and we have capital.

pregnantforever Sat 16-Feb-19 15:40:17

I don't really see why family should help out with costs when they both work and could afford life insurance and choose not to pay for it. It just feels like they expect everybody else to take the hit when the time comes.

CoolJule43 Sat 16-Feb-19 15:43:22

If one of your parents dies will they not have enough savings to pay for a funeral?

If the other then needed care the savings could be used first, the car sold then, if necessary, the home sold.

Alternatively they could have carers come into their home up to 4 times per day, the cost of which their local council will determine based on their financial assets and income.

WhenISnappedAndFarted Sat 16-Feb-19 15:46:01

My parents don't either, I don't think I know anyone with life insurance.

My DF has enough savings for a funeral, my DM doesn't and I'm not quite sure what she thinks will happen.

mummyhaschangedhername Sat 16-Feb-19 15:46:34

Life insurance is traditionally seen as being able to pay off the house, if your already mortgage free you don't need a cash sum to do that. If they having savings then I assume that covers funeral costs. So I suppose in that sense they aren't worse off than someone who has a reducing policy to cover just the mortgage.

Obviously having life insurance is advantageous, but it doesn't sound like it's a necessity. Life insurance becomes insanely expensive as people get older for obvious reasons.

CoolJule43 Sat 16-Feb-19 15:48:17

The fact is they didn't take out Life Assurance. I don't think they'd be able to take out LA for large sums now because of their age. They only need to cover funeral costs so over 50s or Funeral Director's plan should be fine.

Life Assurance is payable only on death so won't help with future care costs.

YellowLilies Sat 16-Feb-19 15:54:21

Yabu. They sell the house and have plenty to care for themselves.

CoolJule43 Sat 16-Feb-19 15:56:56

A lot of people of your parents' age never bothered with Life Assurance but put away money to pay for funerals.

After the 2nd parent dies, hopefully a long way into the future, any money you may have to contribute to a funeral will presumably return to you and siblings when their estate is distributed.

MissDemelzaCarne Sat 16-Feb-19 15:57:27

YABU, they own their own home which would have to be sold if needed.

Rade Sat 16-Feb-19 15:58:42

I don't see why you think you will have to help out confused. They have savings and no mortgage and are only in their 50s so not exactly looking at care homes yet.
Is it because you want them to have life insurance for your inheritance?

Mummyoflittledragon Sat 16-Feb-19 16:00:06

Dh and I have insurance to pay off mortgage in the event of death. Life assurance. No. Your parents have savings and their house is paid off. If one of them dies they can always downsize if they need to raise extra funds.

I don’t understand why you’re upset. Your parents seem to have provided for themselves adequately and your father is choosing to work. He is also choosing not to look after his health. It is his life. You run yours how you choose.

winsinbin Sat 16-Feb-19 16:00:09

DH and I had massive life insurance policies when DC were young and we had a mortgage. DC are grown up now and the mortgage is paid off and so we have no life insurance. I can’t see the point now no one is financially dependent on us.

If either of us were to die the other one would get by on our own earnings, savings and eventually pensions. If both of us were to die DC would have to pay for the funeral (which I hope would be the cheapest available option) in the short term but would later benefit from the sale of our various assets.

Incidentally, the last instance policies we took out were when we were in out mid 40s, to cover a new mortgage. The premiums (compared with the ones we took out in our 20s and 30s were astronomical.

Mummyoflittledragon Sat 16-Feb-19 16:01:13

I also assume inheritance.

Romanov Sat 16-Feb-19 16:01:41

They can sell their house if they need to, they have savings, they can use that

Are you really upset because it will be eating in to your inheritance?

grumiosmum Sat 16-Feb-19 16:05:15

Life insurance is to pay off a mortgage (normally) or provide for dependents (young children) if you die early.

Your parents don't seem to be in that situation, so why would they need it?

And yes, it would be prohibitively expensive for them at that age if they already have health issues.

CuriousaboutSamphire Sat 16-Feb-19 16:05:20

Life insurance?

Apart from the previous responses there us the reality of the cost: benefit analysis.

Take DH. He works at heights, drives a lot, works some nights, uses a lot of heavy machinery.

I am now self employed, gave him intermittent earnings, drive a lot

We both work over 40 hours a week and include weekend work.

DH is uninsurable and the cost for me is daft, even if I can find an insurer who will take me.

If you have a less than run if the mill job you cannot simply take out life insurance.

fruitbrewhaha Sat 16-Feb-19 16:05:44

Nope, they don't need life insurance.

Insurance is there for when you have dependants. So DP and I have it because if one of use dies or is incapacitated, we have a lump sum to make things easier and and annual income that would pay for childcare while the other could work full time. This is until the kids are 21.

So if your parents have some savings to pay for a funeral, and equity in the house, why would they need life insurance. It doesn't pay for care.

grumiosmum Sat 16-Feb-19 16:06:52

If one of them dies, the funeral costs usually come out of the estate. So that would be the house and any savings they have.

TaimaandRanyasBestFriend Sat 16-Feb-19 16:09:44

Keep your nose out. You are not obligated to provide care for them, either, so don't be guilted into it, it doesn't trouble your brother and it shouldn't trouble you.

Life insurance is often a rip off, really only essential if you have dependents or haven't paid off your mortgage.

This comes across as miffed about getting less inheritance.

Dextrodependant Sat 16-Feb-19 16:10:59

Life insurance wouldn't pay for a care home so I don't see your point there.

Thadeus Sat 16-Feb-19 16:14:05

As others have said if they have no mortgage then they don’t need life insurance. However do they have plans if they have to sell the house to pay for care and have they sorted their funeral plans and paid for it. Are the title deeds done correctly to safeguard each other and wills drawn up? A living will is a great idea.

Alsohuman Sat 16-Feb-19 16:14:27

We don’t have life insurance as we have no mortgage and no dependents. We have enough ready cash to pay for our funerals as well as additional less liquid savings. Why would we need it? Why do your parents need it, OP?

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