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to think pamper parties for primary school children is not appropriate

(318 Posts)
dancinginthehall Thu 24-Jan-19 11:12:34

I don't want to de-rail another thread, so thought I'd start a new one. My 9 year old niece has been invited to a couple of these recently and doesn't particularly enjoy them. Her parents aren't particularly keen either.

AIBU to wonder why young girls can't just remain children for a while and not have these grown up style events pushed on them? Surely at 9 party games or bowling or a trip to the cinema is more appropriate than having their make up and nails done?

anitagreen Thu 24-Jan-19 11:13:31

My daughter would love this
I love makeup and all beauty things and my daughter sees me getting glammed up and wants to join in too, there's no harm in it at all?

FaFoutis Thu 24-Jan-19 11:15:06

Of course there is harm in it.

YANBU.

Jennypilgim Thu 24-Jan-19 11:18:14

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

GerryblewuptheER Thu 24-Jan-19 11:22:03

Depends what it is really.

A few kids mucking about with nail polish and lip gloss and boys being allowed to do it too fine.

Full on clown face make up and focus on "looking pretty" then no.

All those products on kids skin can't be good either.

Jennypilgim Thu 24-Jan-19 11:23:58

But surely there's more imaginative or age appropriate things parents could organise? Even jumping around on a bouncy castle is healthier than sitting around having your lips painted and your eyes done up, and probably more fun for the majority of the girls.

Knittink Thu 24-Jan-19 11:24:26

YANBU. Ugh.

Seline Thu 24-Jan-19 11:25:29

Some girls like that sort of thing. Some don't. Demonizing traditionally "girly" girls isn't any better than demonizing less girly girls.

anitagreen Thu 24-Jan-19 11:25:55

What is the harm from children painting their nails? My DG used to do my makeup and dress me as a little princess and take silly photos that I've still got now and it was so much fun, it's not like I was going clubbing I was a child playing dress up? Off all the things in the world to worry about confused

clinkingglasses Thu 24-Jan-19 11:26:33

My DD is 11 and hates those parties. I also hate her being asked to them as I agree they're just not appropriate. DD agrees to have her nails done but politely declines the make up option. She'd far prefer to be at a bowling alley or taken to a film or to McDonalds.

Ghanagirl Thu 24-Jan-19 11:26:58

@anitagreen
I love getting glammed up but I don’t think girls of nine should be encouraged to focus on looking pretty we don’t do this to little boys.

formerbabe Thu 24-Jan-19 11:27:13

I agree op.

FaFoutis Thu 24-Jan-19 11:27:21

It usually involves hiring in people to do treatments, not just a bit of DIY nail varnish.

anitagreen Thu 24-Jan-19 11:27:38

My Ds loves playing with my makeup brushes too it's just kids having fun isn't it? Most makeup these days if you buy the right brand can be good for skin I don't think it's as war paintish as it used to be either so I don't see the harm their for skin either

clinkingglasses Thu 24-Jan-19 11:28:06

anita there's a big difference between your granny rubbing a bit of lipstick onto your cheeks and letting you dress up in one of her old dresses, and a full on party where the entire focus is on proper make up and having your nails done.

BarbarianMum Thu 24-Jan-19 11:28:08

I agee. I find the idea that a group of 8 or 9 year old girls cant think of anything more fun to do really sad.

I have sons, so copious experience of small boys and they dont seem to become even vaguely interested in their looks til 12/13. Girls do mature earlier so I can understand an 11 year old getting into make up etc but all the unrelenting pressure on younger girls to look nice is grim.

Ratbagratty Thu 24-Jan-19 11:28:16

Not a party but my Brownies asked for a pamper evening, we did a cleanse and tone using natural products, Yog, oats vinegar, water etc, Cucumber on eyes whilst listening to chill out music, water with fruit in it and the majority enjoyed it.

Think it depends on definition of "pamper"

JacquesHammer Thu 24-Jan-19 11:28:41

and probably more fun for the majority of the girls

Ever thought the party may be for the benefit of the birthday child who might <gasp> really like that sort of thing and find it fun?

My DD went to one a couple of years ago. They got to play with a load of make up, had a blast, went home. I can't get worked up about it.

BarbarianMum Thu 24-Jan-19 11:29:13

Has your ds had a lot of pamper parties anita?

minipie Thu 24-Jan-19 11:29:18

YANBU. If you want to let your own 9 year old put on make up and nail polish then go ahead but I’d prefer you not to invite my 9 yr old to do it.

Kokeshi123 Thu 24-Jan-19 11:29:34

Does anyone else have a deep loathing of the word "pamper"?

There's something about this word that makes me want to claw my own throat out.

JacquesHammer Thu 24-Jan-19 11:29:40

Just to add, the place had an absolute tonne of dressing up clothes and a photo booth too.

It was a really sweet party. I've got an amazing pic of DD dressed up as a cat with makeup to match - lovely!

firawla Thu 24-Jan-19 11:29:47

I don’t see a massive issue at 9. It’s a party - it’s not full face of make up daily!

buttyblahblah Thu 24-Jan-19 11:30:02

I'm not keen at all. DD has been to couple of fairly innocuous ones though, nothing major and no make up.

We did something similar at home but punked it up. The girls sprayed each other's hair luminous colours and rainbow painted each other's nails before setting off mento rockets in the garden. I felt we kept a nice balance.

user1511042793 Thu 24-Jan-19 11:30:38

My daughter had one and all her friends attended. Luckily no such judgment here and everyone said they had a great time. A boy attended too. Nothing wrong with looking after yourself.

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