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To have asked my friend to do this?

(60 Posts)
annikin Wed 23-Jan-19 23:46:22

I was already feeling bad about this, but now having read another thread I feel worse, but I still don't have another solution, so I'm wondering whether this comes under 'really cheeky' or 'a helping hand from a friend'.

Basically I should be able to collect my dd (11) from school before school closes (5pm), if all goes well. Unfortunately on the journey I do, about once a month/6 weeks there is a crash or something so I am delayed. My dd has SN so can't walk home by herself (as well as too far and too dark), so I at that point turn to friends to see if one can collect her and keep her for me for 30 mins/1 hour until I get there. Is this incredibly cheeky? (I try to ask a different one each time, so no-one gets too fed up with it if that helps...).

I have no help from family, we never go out as we don't have babysitters. I've never asked anyone for help before and am rubbish at doing so, and I feel awful about it. They do say they don't mind, but are they just being polite? Would everyone actually mind this and be getting annoyed, or are there some people out there who genuinely don't mind helping out occasionally?

Error

VelocityViewServlet : Error processing a template for path '/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3488058-To-have-asked-my-friend-to-do-this'

Invocation of method 'isVoting' in class com.mumsnet.talk.models.TalkThread threw exception java.util.ConcurrentModificationException at talk/message_block.html[line 175, column 96]
java.util.ConcurrentModificationException
	at java.util.HashMap$HashIterator.nextNode(HashMap.java:1429)
	at java.util.HashMap$KeyIterator.next(HashMap.java:1453)
	at com.mumsnet.talk.models.AibuVotingThread.pruneCacheIfNeeded(AibuVotingThread.java:51)
	at com.mumsnet.talk.models.AibuVotingThread.isItAibuVotingThread(AibuVotingThread.java:34)
	at com.mumsnet.talk.models.TalkThread.isVoting(TalkThread.java:1209)
	at sun.reflect.GeneratedMethodAccessor248.invoke(Unknown Source)
	at sun.reflect.DelegatingMethodAccessorImpl.invoke(DelegatingMethodAccessorImpl.java:43)
	at java.lang.reflect.Method.invoke(Method.java:498)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.PropertyExecutor.execute(PropertyExecutor.java:142)
	at org.apache.velocity.util.introspection.UberspectImpl$VelGetterImpl.invoke(UberspectImpl.java:533)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTIdentifier.execute(ASTIdentifier.java:198)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTReference.execute(ASTReference.java:262)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTReference.evaluate(ASTReference.java:470)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTAndNode.evaluate(ASTAndNode.java:106)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTExpression.evaluate(ASTExpression.java:62)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTIfStatement.render(ASTIfStatement.java:85)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTBlock.render(ASTBlock.java:72)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTIfStatement.render(ASTIfStatement.java:87)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.SimpleNode.render(SimpleNode.java:336)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.directive.Parse.render(Parse.java:260)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTDirective.render(ASTDirective.java:175)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTBlock.render(ASTBlock.java:72)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.SimpleNode.render(SimpleNode.java:336)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTIfStatement.render(ASTIfStatement.java:106)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTBlock.render(ASTBlock.java:72)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.directive.Foreach.render(Foreach.java:366)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTDirective.render(ASTDirective.java:175)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTBlock.render(ASTBlock.java:72)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.SimpleNode.render(SimpleNode.java:336)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTIfStatement.render(ASTIfStatement.java:106)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.SimpleNode.render(SimpleNode.java:336)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.directive.Parse.render(Parse.java:260)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.ASTDirective.render(ASTDirective.java:175)
	at org.apache.velocity.runtime.parser.node.SimpleNode.render(SimpleNode.java:336)
	at org.apache.velocity.Template.merge(Template.java:328)
	at org.apache.velocity.Template.merge(Template.java:235)
	at org.apache.velocity.tools.view.servlet.VelocityViewServlet.performMerge(VelocityViewServlet.java:805)
	at com.mumsnet.baseservlets.CommonBaseServlet.performMerge(CommonBaseServlet.java:486)
	at org.apache.velocity.tools.view.servlet.VelocityViewServlet.mergeTemplate(VelocityViewServlet.java:762)
	at org.apache.velocity.tools.view.servlet.VelocityViewServlet.doRequest(VelocityViewServlet.java:555)
	at org.apache.velocity.tools.view.servlet.VelocityViewServlet.doGet(VelocityViewServlet.java:509)
	at javax.servlet.http.HttpServlet.service(HttpServlet.java:624)
	at javax.servlet.http.HttpServlet.service(HttpServlet.java:731)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:303)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at org.apache.tomcat.websocket.server.WsFilter.doFilter(WsFilter.java:52)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at com.mumsnet.filters.XSSFilter.doFilter(XSSFilter.java:29)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at com.mumsnet.filters.CSRFFilter.doFilter(CSRFFilter.java:31)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at com.mumsnet.filters.SessionNotifierInitialisationFilter.doFilter(SessionNotifierInitialisationFilter.java:28)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at com.mumsnet.filters.AdvertisingFilter.doFilter(AdvertisingFilter.java:161)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at com.mumsnet.filters.ReferralTrackingFilter.doFilter(ReferralTrackingFilter.java:147)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at com.mumsnet.filters.FirstSeenCookieFilter.doFilter(FirstSeenCookieFilter.java:32)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at com.mumsnet.filters.AuthenticationFilter.doFilter(AuthenticationFilter.java:38)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at com.mumsnet.filters.RequestFilter.doFilter(RequestFilter.java:120)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.internalDoFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:241)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.ApplicationFilterChain.doFilter(ApplicationFilterChain.java:208)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.StandardWrapperValve.invoke(StandardWrapperValve.java:220)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.StandardContextValve.invoke(StandardContextValve.java:122)
	at de.javakaffee.web.msm.RequestTrackingContextValve.invoke(RequestTrackingContextValve.java:99)
	at org.apache.catalina.authenticator.AuthenticatorBase.invoke(AuthenticatorBase.java:505)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.StandardHostValve.invoke(StandardHostValve.java:169)
	at de.javakaffee.web.msm.RequestTrackingHostValve.invoke(RequestTrackingHostValve.java:170)
	at org.apache.catalina.valves.ErrorReportValve.invoke(ErrorReportValve.java:103)
	at org.apache.catalina.core.StandardEngineValve.invoke(StandardEngineValve.java:116)
	at org.apache.catalina.valves.RemoteIpValve.invoke(RemoteIpValve.java:683)
	at org.apache.catalina.connector.CoyoteAdapter.service(CoyoteAdapter.java:436)
	at org.apache.coyote.http11.AbstractHttp11Processor.process(AbstractHttp11Processor.java:1078)
	at org.apache.coyote.AbstractProtocol$AbstractConnectionHandler.process(AbstractProtocol.java:625)
	at org.apache.tomcat.util.net.JIoEndpoint$SocketProcessor.run(JIoEndpoint.java:316)
	at java.util.concurrent.ThreadPoolExecutor.runWorker(ThreadPoolExecutor.java:1142)
	at java.util.concurrent.ThreadPoolExecutor$Worker.run(ThreadPoolExecutor.java:617)
	at org.apache.tomcat.util.threads.TaskThread$WrappingRunnable.run(TaskThread.java:61)
	at java.lang.Thread.run(Thread.java:745)