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To think waking up early will solve 99% of my problems!

(133 Posts)
Gamechanger12e3 Tue 15-Jan-19 20:24:49

Someone please help me!
I am single handedly causing my own issues by sleeping in late EVERY MORNING!!

Due to me waking up late.. I'm late for work everyday meaning i always have to work late to make up my hours. This has a knock on affect to my evenings where banks/places are closed by the time i finish work so i have to wait for weekends to run errands. My work is very flexible so they don't care too much.

I always looks like SHIT at work because i literally roll out of bed, into clothes and out the door! Which affects my self esteem!!

I can't arrange morning meetings/appointments because i know I wont wake up on time.

My weekends i wake up super late so waste half the day in bed. Ffs!! I only have a few hours during the day to carry out all my errands!!

I've always been this way. Since a child. I used to be late for school everyday and constantly reprimanded.

I don't know why!! I've been tested by the GP and everything has come back fine. Ive tried going to bed super early/late/reasonable hour. Nothing works!! I've tried setting several alarms on both my phone and manual alarm.. I sleep through them all!!

I think its learnt behaviour. My mother is exactly the same and was always late. She was self employed so never really had consequences for this. She sleeps until noon most days!! Our household was a 'night owl' household. We'd all be awake until early hours despite given bedtimes and then late every morning.

I don't know what to do!! Its ruining my life!! How do i change?? Has anyone else ever suffered the same?!!

If i could just wake up at a reasonable hour 99% of my issues could be resolved!!

How do i discipline myself?!

Has anyone else ever suffered this? Its not normal!! I piss myself off!! I cant rely on myself to do anything morning related which cuts out half my days!!

Someone please advise or give me a kick up the @**!!

Ethel36 Tue 15-Jan-19 20:30:43

Try going to bed every night around 9pm and listen to a meditation clip. Try and get into this habit of going to bed early. My sister always goes to bed late (12/1am) and struggles big time to get up in the morning. I head to bed at 9ish to read or relax, and usually fall asleep around 10pm.

Houseonahill Tue 15-Jan-19 20:32:25

That alarm clock is 113 decibels and has a separate vibrating thing you can put under your pillow if you want. Put it on the opposite side of the room so you physically have to get up to turn it off and then don't get back into bed no matter how warm and comfy it looks

donajimena Tue 15-Jan-19 20:35:34

I used to be a tour rep. I'd see the last guests off the coach from the airport at ar

isthistoonosy Tue 15-Jan-19 20:38:53

I use to be like you but then I got a job that I need to be at work 6am most days and also started living with my OH who gets up at 5am everyday. It took a while to get use to it but I'm getting there, and its only been 10 yrs!

I think your problem is just lack of motivation / reason to get up - so you have no reason to go to bed.

What do you do in the evenings?, what is keeping you awake?

donajimena Tue 15-Jan-19 20:39:15

Bloody phone! Around 2am, then go for a pint blush I had to be out of the house for 8am looking polished. After a few near misses I discovered the best way to get up was to lock my alarm clock (no mobiles back then) in a cash tin and put the key downstairs. I had no choice but to get up and I knew going back to bed wasn't an option.

cardibach Tue 15-Jan-19 20:45:06

Sleep through alarms? You literally leave an alarm going for the hours it will ring for and sleep through? Or wake up and switch them off before going back to sleep?

DropZoneOne Tue 15-Jan-19 20:47:41

What if you scheduled 9am meetings so you have to get up on time?

I have a flexible workplace too, I'm rarely there before 9.15. But my work involves meetings in London and overseas travel - i can manage those just fine. So it's being able to get up when i have a deadline (train / plane).

CinnamonToaster Tue 15-Jan-19 20:50:42

I'm the same. In my case it's because I am crap at going to bed. If I could be more disciplined about going to bed, my life would be much improved. But then if I could be more disciplined about not eating biscuits, I'd be thinner.

Imalittleelf Tue 15-Jan-19 20:55:12

Have you tried and alarm clock that lights up? I could sleep through anything (gale force storm in a tent /earthquake etc) but I found the alarm clock light ould wake me gradually before the actual alarm went off and it's quite bright. Especially good for winter.

ShinyButtons Tue 15-Jan-19 21:00:07

I also have this problem. I set 6 alarms every morning starting at 6 then at intervals until 7.30 I generally sleep right through at least 3 of them and somehow manage to turn off the others without waking up. When I finally do wake up I have no recollection of the alarms going off or of turning them off.

I tried one of those super loud alarms but unfortunately I live in a flat and all that happened was I woke my neighbour up. I eventually woke up to them hammering on my door because they thought I must have had an accident or died. Thankfully they are lovely people.

Last week I did discover my fitbit had a vibrating alarm and amazingly it has so far woken me up every morning. No idea how I can sleep though so many loud alarms yet a silent little vibrating alarm on my wrist works.

Cranky17 Tue 15-Jan-19 21:04:52

Op I was going to write something very similar, I put an alarm downstairs but I don’t the will power to not go down, turn it off and then get back in bed.
I love my bed, I hate getting up and cause lots of dramas because of this.

jellyshoeswithdiamonds Tue 15-Jan-19 21:06:46

I've set my Fitbit to remind me to go to bed at a reasonable time.

Also set it to wake me up, even if its on my bedside table the vibrating wakes me.

FusionChefGeoff Tue 15-Jan-19 21:08:41

Do you drink tea or coffee?

I have a teasmaid and it's soooooo much nicer waking up in the morning as there's the added motivation of a cup of tea right next to my bed!

Or, put it on the other side of the room - it has a VERY annoying and persistent beep so by the time you're up to turn it off you might as well just have the cuppa!

rytonsister Tue 15-Jan-19 21:08:55

It is habit...

I work shifts and I revert to night owl but I get away with it as out of a 6 day week only to see early turns where I am up at 5.30.

I also recently found I severely have no medical issues?

FusionChefGeoff Tue 15-Jan-19 21:09:33

Oh and do regular cardio exercise - makes you more tired ergo earlier to bed, better sleep, hopefully easier to wake earlier.

TheSconeOfStone Tue 15-Jan-19 21:10:30

I used to be like this. Children waking at 5.00 got me out of it. I still really struggle but having to be up to get them up (they take after their parents and no longer wake at 5.00) has forced me to change my ways.

I set the alarm 30 mins earlier than I need so I can slowly come round. I feel just as bad whether it's 6.00 am or 11.00 so I might as well get up.

Squirrel26 Tue 15-Jan-19 21:11:33

I got a dog. He wakes me up, and if I ignore him, he goes downstairs and pees on the sofa. Sometimes I just let him, and deal with the consequences later.

Jackshouse Tue 15-Jan-19 21:12:10

What stuff do you need to go to the back for? Can’t you do it on line?

Honesttodog Tue 15-Jan-19 21:14:34

Maybe do some training on yourself? Read a little bit about learning new habits.

Only way I changed morning habits was realising how upset kids get when you are late. It makes them stressed, literally tense, or mine do at least, so I could not upset them like that. I also did some calculations on missed minutes of school and that also added up. I watched a parent turning up late every day with their kids and I decided I really didn’t want my kids to feel like that. Think about how you want to be perceived and how you can mindful become that person. Repeat the success as often possible so it becomes a habit. For me it’s counting down from 5 then getting into the shower so my day starts. I really hate Mornings and always will but I have managed to fight off a bit of my laziness this way.

museumum Tue 15-Jan-19 21:15:20

Get a daylight/sunrise alarm clock. It’s changed my life. It gets light for 30mins before wake up time and I still need the buzzer at that point but I am in a much lighter sleep and can get up without snoozing.

Before getting the sunrise click I could sleep through any alarm / put it off in my sleep.

greenlynx Tue 15-Jan-19 21:19:08

I’m also a night owl and struggle with early rising. I put my mobile on a hard surface at the furthest corner of the bedroom so the alarm makes very loud unpleasant sound. At my youth days I used to ask someone to phone on my landline. It worked every time for me. As a long term solution cutting caffeine and slowly moving bedtime might help.

Auramigraine Tue 15-Jan-19 21:19:52

I was like this before kids...... I would get up early for work etc but on a weekend when I didn’t HAVE to get up, I would set alarm and say right I’m getting up early to get dressed and do XYZ then have all the day to enjoy looking round shops etc, never happened. My alarm would go off I would think 5 more mins then before I knew it half the day was wasted. Now I have to get up as my kids are awake/school run so there’s a reason to. No advice other than maybe arrange to meet someone in the AM or find a reason to have to be up early...

MitziK Tue 15-Jan-19 21:23:23

It's taking a very long time, but I'm getting the feeling we might be getting somewhere with exactly this problem (other than it being a huge problem if I'm late for work - I dream of a job where they don't care!).

Sleep Hygiene (Crap Name, but at least it's not 'Nighttime Routine', to which, my head automatically replies 'I'm not fucking two years old').

Nothing else in the bedroom than comfortable bedding and furniture. It's for sleep and shagging, not watching TV staring glazed-eyed at QVC at stupid o'clock and feeling yourself gradually thinking 'That sounds pretty good, really..

A dark room. Blackout curtains for those who can afford them, long black IKEA ones for mere mortals with two huge windows.

A blue light filter app on your phone and laptop kicking in by 7pm.

A cool room.

No coffee. Sorry. NO COFFEE. At all. NONE. Tea is just about OK if you stop by about 5pm. I can't believe I've stopped drinking it, seeing as I've been a fan since I was about 4 years old on the Mellow Birds and something as blackened and bitter as my cold, dark soul since I was about 13. Obviously, this also means no Red Bull or Coke. I am so sorry and feel your pain on this.

Loads of water to drink during the day. Because you're on a maximum of about 3 cups of tea all day and you're going to have to make them last.

Eat by 7pm.

By 9pm, most of the lights in the house need to be out, especially the ones upstairs. They shouldn't be switched on at all, or you'll ping wide awake again. Lamps or fairy lights are the maximum light source.

Have a warm bath around 10pm with nothing brighter than candlelight. (I can really recommend a bath in darkness, though). Get dry, dressed for bed and without switching the lights on, go and get into bed. If you have an LED light that can be almost off, but purely red toned, that won't disturb you, but any bulb on the lowest dimmer setting will wake you up again.

Stay off your phone. It's OK to have a non light up mp3 player and squishy soft earphones to listen to something that doesn't require attention. For a weird reason, stuff about Medieval/Renaissance music does it for me, as does a Gaelic chat radio station and Gardener's Question Time on a loop. If you sleep on your side, just use one earphone.

Have as many pillows as you need, including any for sticking between your knees, resting arms on, etc.

The next bit actually costs money - a sunrise alarm. It doesn't always work immediately, but it certainly helped almost immediately as when my normal alarm goes off, because the light has gradually brightened over 45 minutes, I don't feel like dying with the first beeps or switch it off without realising.

And the last thing of all is a bonus - an OH who will get up and open the curtains. Stagger up, pull your quilt over so your bed is made when you come back to it, off into a warm shower and you'll feel much better than falling out of the house in a panic.

Mornings are gradually becoming tolerable and far less rushed.

I stick the alarm on an hour later at the weekend, but you can't stay asleep all Saturday to try and make up for it, as that throws you out for the rest of the week.

Hope that helps. I hate the idea of having to do all this, but it seems to work for me when I thought nothing ever would - I'm still working on very little sleep and sometimes none at all, but I'm able to get up, which is the most important bit.

Love51 Tue 15-Jan-19 21:28:26

My solution was to marry an early riser. A bit extreme, perhaps borrow a toddler or a dog just long enough to reset your body clock?
Also, keep the same hours whether it is weekday or weekend. Your body will learn, you just have to teach it the right things.

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