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To be miffed at school for telling DS Jesus loves him

(146 Posts)
wwdorado Fri 11-Jan-19 20:45:11

DS is 5 and started reception at an infant school that is not (officially??) affiliated with the church.
Obviously I understand that this is a Christian county and they do the Lord's Prayer/grace etc learn about religion (s) but since starting school he has started talking about Jesus and God. All the time. He says he loves god and Jesus and that Jesus loves him.
Someone must be telling him this?
Is this normal?
We are both just WTF - both of us not religious in the slightest.

Someone tell me it's just a phase?

PoutySprout Sun 13-Jan-19 13:33:11

Its annoying but in the scheme, not that important.

You don’t think it’s important that this is state sponsored?

Confusedbeetle Sun 13-Jan-19 13:32:24

This happened to me 40 years ago and I was pretty miffed. He grew out of it very quickly and is now a well adjusted atheist. Its annoying but in the scheme, not that important. They quickly work out what they want to believe. Children can learn very well that we all have different beliefs and that there is no one truth

DaveCoachesgavemetheclap Sun 13-Jan-19 13:20:58

Even a church school really shouldn't be saying that.

hmm

ltk Sun 13-Jan-19 13:07:46

I just tell mine that there is no God, but plenty of people think there is, and it's super important to them. And when someone says something like 'Jesus loves you', they mean it kindly, so be polite.

PoutySprout Sun 13-Jan-19 12:55:25

There is a difference between religious EDUCATION and religious INSTRUCTION.

PoutySprout Sun 13-Jan-19 12:54:49

Still can’t believe people think RE is about teaching children to be religious! It was in 1811 but now it’s about learning about what religious people believe and how they live their lives. It’s also about nurturing children’s own spirituality which all children have even if they don’t adhere to a faith. This sadly gets squashed in childhood by parents who freak out at the mere idea..

Still can’t believe people can’t tell the difference between RE lessons, where all religions are covered in a “some people believe” way and the daily ACT of broadly Christian worship, where there is no discussion or comparison of other belief systems.

loolooskip Sun 13-Jan-19 12:54:13

I went to a very religious primary (much to my very aggressively anti religion Mother's horror).

We said the Lord's Prayer three times a day, said grace, had an assembly every day where we sang hymns, I'm sure lots of people in their 40's and above on here did similar.

Whilst I don't believe in God now (I don't think, typical Brit - maybe there's something and if the shit hits the fan I'll pray, love going to Easter, Christmas and harvest services but like science too much to really be able to fully believe grin), at the time I suffered an earth shattering event. At 7 my Mum left us.

I have to say, I found so much solace and comfort in thinking there may be a God and remember my headmaster telling me Jesus loved me and it was something I carried with me for a while.

That's just my experience. I'm in the States now and schools are strictly anti religion (or one at least) but I've been teaching ds about all types of religion and what different people believe.

It's so hard because although in practice religion can be the root of all evil, it can also be a prop and comfort to many in times of suffering.

MitziK Sun 13-Jan-19 12:44:24

Thing is, not all teachers or schools can tell the difference between Religious Education and Religious Instruction. And the compulsory Christianity element of school doesn't help. Or idiot parents kicking off about visits to mosques.

Wearywithteens Sun 13-Jan-19 12:30:56

Still can’t believe people think RE is about teaching children to be religious! It was in 1811 but now it’s about learning about what religious people believe and how they live their lives. It’s also about nurturing children’s own spirituality which all children have even if they don’t adhere to a faith. This sadly gets squashed in childhood by parents who freak out at the mere idea...

MitziK Sat 12-Jan-19 18:49:33

Robins certainly didn't. The version I was told was that one was marked by a drop of blood at the Crucifixion.

However - it sounds slightly less ridiculous (in a religious sense) when you realise that the European Robin's range extends to spending winters in North Africa and Israel.

In any case, using that little snippet of folklore in front of the very religious Head Teacher meant the site team didn't clear the nest above the entrance to the RE rooms. So it can have its uses at times.

lanbro Sat 12-Jan-19 18:31:32

My 5 year old learnt that robins have red breasts from when they flew around the fire warming baby Jesus, and that tinsel is to represent the webs that spiders made around the manger! Not a religious school, I just told dd it was just a story that some people believe but I don't, she can make her own decisions when she's older!

TheClitterati Sat 12-Jan-19 18:24:10

Unfortunately our primary goes well beyond the curriculum requirement. And it's not( meant to be) a religious school. I think the head is very religious. Not sure about staff.

ReaganSomerset Sat 12-Jan-19 15:33:04

@poutysprout

Most of the teachers I know don't like the 'daily act of worship' very much either. The majority of teachers I work with are also atheist. It's a legal requirement though. People who take issue with it (quite rightly, IMO) need to take the requirement itself up with their local mp, rather than taking it out on the school.

Blackboot Sat 12-Jan-19 15:28:24

I once got in trouble for reading my history book during religion time. My mother had to pretend to be annoyed about my 'crime'.

PoutySprout Sat 12-Jan-19 14:58:21

Schools in England and Wales have to teach RE. They don't teach it as fact.

The teaching bit is okay.

It’s the active participation in one religion on a daily basis (sometimes several times a day) that’s expected/enforced that is the problem.

BrilliantDarling Sat 12-Jan-19 14:55:03

Op would you feel differently about this if his grandparents weren't Muslim? Are they your parents or your husbands?

CountFosco Sat 12-Jan-19 14:25:59

But that is what the church believes. That Jesus loves you. If you don’t like its teachings take your child out of that church school.

I don't send my kids to a church school. My kids still came home in infants saying 'Jesus loves me' and 'you will go to hell for not being a friend of Jesus'. There is no option for parents who do not want their children exposed to prosleytising Christians because it is state sanctioned.

Teaching about different faiths is valuable and teaches tolerance but 'jesus loves me' should not be taught in school in the same way teachers are not allowed to push their political beliefs with their students.

Yabbers Sat 12-Jan-19 13:12:32

Well apart from the fact that Christians aren’t blowing each other up, for being “the wrong sort of Christians”.

Do you watch the news at all?

Valanice1989 Sat 12-Jan-19 13:06:23

Single verses often leave out a wider context. I’m afraid I’m no biblical scholar but I refuse to let those quotes define the Christians I know who work quietly, lovingly and prayerfully at food banks, prisons, hospices, tirelessly visiting the old, ill and lonely and just generally give of themselves to those who have the least....

But surely those people would be just as nice if they weren't Christians? Plenty of non-Christians do those things.

How much of the Bible have you actually read? I don't agree that the quotes I posted leave out the wider context. Contempt for women is woven into the fabric of the Bible. Is there any chance of you apologising for calling me ignorant, now that you've admitted that you yourself are "no biblical scholar"?

Shortandsweet20 Sat 12-Jan-19 11:15:01

Schools have to teach RE and follow the local syllabus given by your local SACRE. You can normally find it online so maybe have a look there to see if it's been followed. Teaching RE is so difficult especially to the younger ones, they can't always understand 'some people believe' so it might not be the teachers are forcing it but they have misunderstood what they've been told. My class really struggled with not everyone believes in god and it causes a big talking point for the week! But if you're not happy, ask to speak to teach to class teacher or RE lead within school.

Dahlietta Sat 12-Jan-19 11:00:09

My son came home telling me that when god is sad it rains. And when there is a rainbow he's happy. He said the ta had told him.

To be fair though, that isn't even Christianity - that's just bollocks grin

mostlydrinkstea Sat 12-Jan-19 10:28:50

Schools in England and Wales have to teach RE. They don't teach it as fact. It is taught in the context of knowing ourselves and our culture and other people and their culture so that we can function in a multicultural society. Each local authority has to have an agreed syllabus. The one fromEssex is here https://schools.essex.gov.uk/other/Essex_SACRE/Pages/Essex-SACRE.aspx and includes resources for humanism which I know many RE teachers have been asking for.

Church schools have a different syllabus which will focus on Christianity but will bring in other faiths depending on the local context. RE when taught well teaches children how to ask questions and they get to practice that on faith and worldview.

masterandmargarita Sat 12-Jan-19 10:14:36

I'm not affiliated with any religion in particular but I have absolutely no problem with religious people saying things like this to my kids. They are just all part of the stories and myths embedded in our society and all open to interesting debate in our house.

Pissedoffdotcom Sat 12-Jan-19 09:53:55

YuriGeller a 5 year old needs telling that it is okay if they don't believe. In a conversation or debate you don't need to prefix everything with 'my belief is' but when you are teaching young children about one belief system out of however many, they need to know it is okay not to believe. Personally i'd much rather someone have to say that ten times in one session than have to spend days reassuring my DD that i am not going to hell because i don't believe. She is at the stage currently where she rolls her eyes at anything we say but believes without question what she learns on her Wednesday church visit. Because we don't believe we don't count. That's pretty vile & heavy handed for small children

cathay123 Sat 12-Jan-19 09:52:38

My son came home from Reception thrilled that he now knew how the world was made - God had made it. His was at a
C of E school (no other choice locally here). I had to explain about the big bang just for the sake of balance. The school continued to push religion on him for the whole time he was there. Now he is a complete atheist and hates all religions.

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