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to tell friend that her baby name choice is not unusual?

(285 Posts)
toastofthetown Tue 08-Jan-19 11:31:36

My friend is expecting her first baby later this year. As I’m massively interested in baby names I asked her if she had anything in mind. She said she wanted something unique and is planning on using Aurora. I said that Aurora is a gorgeous name, but has risen hugely in popularity over the last few years and is now in the top hundred. My friend seemed annoyed with this and told me that it is a very uncommon name with only a few born each year, so I just changed the subject.

Since then I’ve been wondering if I said the wrong thing. Was I unreasonable to point out how popular the name is? I wouldn’t have said anything bad about the name itself, but l didn’t want her to regret her choice later, because she didn’t know about the sudden spike in popularity.

CaptainMarvelDanvers Tue 08-Jan-19 11:35:34

The name might be rising in popularity and it might not be unique but I doubt it’s super common.

Unless someone is asking for point blank honest opinions than I think it’s better if you keep your mouth zipped.

To be honest I don’t know why people get so caught up in how common/uncommon a name is.

MrsJayy Tue 08-Jan-19 11:35:41

Yes you upset her when talking baby names you smile nod and make reassuring noises no actual opinions. Btw wasn't Aurora sleeping beauty?

Neverunderfed Tue 08-Jan-19 11:37:56

Hard to say. It has risen in popularity but I only know of one. How did you know it's ranking off the bat?

Reminds me of a friend with a really quite normally named son who insists it is massively unusual to the extent that no other children in the countr had been named it in the last decade. Except I know at least three just in our small area, one of whom has since started a class with her's. 😁

MrsJayy Tue 08-Jan-19 11:38:32

It is a bit unusual though it isn't your Evies or Evas is it, no offence meant to parents of Evies smile

MountPheasant Tue 08-Jan-19 11:40:17

I don’t think you were unreasonable, if it’s important to her that it’s unique then it’s worth her knowing it’s popular surely?

I don’t know why people care about unique names. I’ve wanted to call a daughter Isabelle since I was about 14, and that hasn’t changed now it’s popular.

Cherries101 Tue 08-Jan-19 11:40:59

You’re right, it will become the next Ava in a few years, but best to keep quiet about these things.

Houseonahill Tue 08-Jan-19 11:42:30

I know 3 Auroras under 2 but maybe it depends where you live?

MacarenaFerreiro Tue 08-Jan-19 11:43:37

Your friend doesn't understand what "unique" means.

Crunchymum Tue 08-Jan-19 11:43:44

It's more popular in the 2017 baby name chart than I imagined it would be, but it's still not top 50.

So whilst not completely unique, it's not what I would consider massively popular (that said there is one in my DD preschool class and oddly enough there isn't an Amelia or Olivia in sight!!)

MeredithGrey1 Tue 08-Jan-19 11:44:31

Since she specifically said she'd chosen it because of its uniqueness, I don't think it was massively unreasonable of you to mention it.
If she'd just said she liked it and didn't mention uniqueness being a factor, and you'd said "oh but its becoming more common now, maybe you should pick something else" then I think that would've been more rude.

Bellasorellaa Tue 08-Jan-19 11:44:33

Well it isn’t Mary Jane or Emma but it isn’t that uncommon that name is nice though

Redskyandrainbows67 Tue 08-Jan-19 11:44:42

It’s still pretty uncommon even if in top 100. Names are much more diverse these days and there is a much wider spread.
You said the wrong thing and should probably apologise.

ItsQuietTime Tue 08-Jan-19 11:45:56

I actually think more people should be honest with friend's and family about baby names. Rather than smiling and nodding in agreement that "D'artagnan-Odious Alfie Oliver Smith" sounds like a great name. 😕

@MrsJayy

Yes, well Briar Rose and Aurora are both sleeping beauty's names. Who names their child Briar? hmm

I wouldn't name my daughter after a chick who sat or laid around rather waiting for her prince to come so her life could start. But that's just me.

FineWordsForAPorcupine Tue 08-Jan-19 11:46:17

If you really want your child to have an "unsual" name the best strategy is to give a really, really standard one - John, Anne, etc. Your child will then aquire a range of nicknames as it grows up (there were three Johns in my year, and not one was known as that) which are unique and special to their own personality smile

Unless your strategy by giving your child an unusual name is in fact to demonstrate how unique and special YOU are - in which case, I dunno, get a raven or take up unicycling or something.

SpikyHedgehogg Tue 08-Jan-19 11:46:28

told me that it is a very uncommon name with only a few born each year

I love this idea! Reminds me of Kinder Egg toys or Lego Minifigures - “this one’s very uncommon, they only make a few each year”.

PennyMordauntsLadyBrain Tue 08-Jan-19 11:47:35

In fairness it depends where in the country you are.

I’ve never met an Aurora, but can’t move for Conors or Aoifes.

Redskyandrainbows67 Tue 08-Jan-19 11:48:11

Everyone who calls their baby anything outside of the top 50 think they are being unique but it’s jist more of the same and more jensons, arlos, lacies, Ava’s, etc.

Redskyandrainbows67 Tue 08-Jan-19 11:48:51

And I agree - it’s the child that’s unique not the name.

Bennyismydog Tue 08-Jan-19 11:49:16

What would you achieve by telling her? It just seems a bit mean.
You asked her what name she was having she told you her choice and that she felt the name was unique and then in response you told her it wasn’t as unique as she thought it was.
Its not like she told you she was considering it as a name and what did you think, you asked her what she was having as a name and then when she told you, you told her it wasn’t as unique as she thought.
What would you achieve by recontacting her again to tell her again the name isn’t as common as she thinks?
She loves the name and thinks it’s unique so just leave it be.

firawla Tue 08-Jan-19 11:49:51

ItsQuiet - I heard a toddler being called Briar Rose while waiting in the school playground! And while it’s a pretty name in theory or written down, it sounded awful being shouted across the playground especially shortened to Briar!
Aurora is nicer... but I agree it’s getting more common

Friedspamfritters Tue 08-Jan-19 11:50:37

It's in at number 80 at the moment see here. I don't think you did anything wrong - you just said it was becoming more popular. Unless you're misrepresenting the tone you used I think your friend is being massively touchy. I would probably just apologise though if she's still annoyed - lots of people are very precious about anything concerning their first child but soon calm down.

DGRossetti Tue 08-Jan-19 11:51:07

I’ve never met an Aurora, but can’t move for Conors or Aoifes.

Weirdly the first time (I can remember when Snickers was Marathon grin) I only first heard Aoife last week - one of the scientists presenting the RI Christmas Lectures. Given her accent, I'm guessing it's a Gaelic name ?

Bennyismydog Tue 08-Jan-19 11:51:08

Oh I misread I thought you were going to go back and re tell her the name wasn’t unique apologies op.

It would’ve probably been easiest to smile and nod op.

Skittlesandbeer Tue 08-Jan-19 11:51:20

Send her a link to the Namevoyager graph tool, at babynamewizard.com.

Once you see the name popularity graphed across the decades (and century), it stops all discussion in its tracks. Don’t send her the link for Aurora, she won’t like it (or you for pointing it out). But you can bet she’ll plug it in and see for herself.

It’s a very handy tool, worked a treat when I was looking for a name that was recognisable, but not trending wildly up or down. So far so good!

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