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To say I’ve won! I’ve actually won!

(805 Posts)
YouWinAgain Mon 07-Jan-19 11:41:25

Some of you will recognise my story. I hope you do, and yes I am that poster.

In March 2018 I was attacked and had threats made against my life by my husband in front of our DD aged 2 at the time.

I left him and he was a s**t. He and his family made my life hell threatening to take DD out of her Nursery, pinning me against shelves in supermarkets, accusing me of alienating DD from her paternal family, and basically being made to feel like the perpetrator instead of the victim. He also left me and DD living at my mums for 10 days just because he could. He left me with GAD, PTSD and Social Anxiety.

In November he took me to court for full residency of DD, now aged 3, accusing me of emotionally abusing her and not being able to put her first.

It was a rough time for me; I almost gave up at times, felt like everything was against me including the Social Worker who seemed to swap sides after it went to court. She was also at times suggesting 50/50 contact.

I got a SHL (S**t Hot Lawyer) and was still worried, panicking and had to be grounded several times by her and posters on MN thank you all. I had home condition problems when we first split but did my upmost to work with everyone and get myself back on track. At times I felt like it was hopeless even when he didn’t turn up to her appointments or Nativity Play.

DRA hearing is 2 weeks today. Had the final meeting with the SW this morning to give me the S7, I was nervous as I was expecting her to be on ExHs side.

There’s two bits of good news:

1) SW was recommending that DD stay living with me, and contact with ExH be once a week for 2 hours, and then every other Sunday for 5 hours going up to full day contact (9am-5pm) in 3 months’ time and then overnight just Saturday every other weekend from September when DD starts school. SW suggested the weekly contact cannot clash with her appointments or social occasions!

But 2) 2 weeks before the DRA, ExH has decided to drop the residency and just apply for consistent regular contact with DD. He hasn’t asked for a specific pattern so I think my SHL can negotiate.

I am crying with happiness. We still have to go to court on 21st but I’m not worried anymore, they aren’t taking my DD off me. Looks like SW was on DDs side and neither mine or ExHs.

Sometimes it pays to persevere. I’ve won haven’t I? I’ve actually won!

Motoko Fri 28-Jun-19 02:35:29

Yep, add me to the list of people who are proud of you both! I'm so glad that you're in a much better place now, than when you started these threads. I hope that if you have a wobbly anytime, you remember how far you've come, and remember, you'll get through it, and things usually aren't as bad as they seem.

Shame about the interview, but just see it as practice, and leaving you free to get a job in the field you'd prefer.

Happy Birthday to Mini! cake I hope she has a wonderful day.

greengrower Mon 01-Jul-19 21:36:33

Another one here who is SO proud of what you've achieved! (Followed and posted from start, with several NC along the way)

CynsterBitch Mon 01-Jul-19 21:47:27

First time commenting on your post but I just wanted to say how much I enjoy this thread popping up and seeing how you and mini continue to thrive and be happy.
So happy for you both, I wish you all the best.

SpringFan Fri 06-Sep-19 16:47:18

@YouWinAgain How has Mini's first week at school gone?

notsodimwit Sun 08-Sep-19 18:41:33

How are you and mini doing? smileflowers

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