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AIBU?

To think close friends husband fat shamed me?

78 replies

Livelaughlovetoday · 15/12/2018 12:59

After a lunch on the go with my friend, her DH and our children. Friends DH wanted to go and get somr dessert for himself and wanted to take the kids with him into the shop to choose something sweet too. I asked for a chocolate bar and proceeded to give my child 20 quid. Friends DH then tells me I don’t need a chocolate! To which I respond that I would like one. So he then reminds me what I’ve just had for lunch. (A few of my children’s chips). So I point out that he had just eaten a pizza! I thought he was joking and laughed. Off they go and when they return him and the kids are munching on their sweets and dessert and there’s nothing for me!

I was so taken aback! My DS came and sat by me and offered to share (even though I never said anything).

Except I don’t know if I’m being over sensitive? Feel like I need to say something to him. WWYD?

OP posts:
Chewinggumwalk · 15/12/2018 13:01

Say what????

What a dick. You could be tiny or huge, it’s got absolutely nothing to do with him, or anyone but you. So sorry, don’t let him upset you.

Wonder if he controls your friend like that? Sad

gemsparkle84 · 15/12/2018 13:03

I wouldn't say anything but yes he fat shamed you. Just be safe in the knowledge he's an arse hole and save that little nugget of knowledge for a special occasion Smile I'm sure the opportunity will come up in the future for you to let him know what a dick he is. Absolutely nothing to do with him what you had to eat for lunch or in fact what you want to eat ever. Perhaps your sensitive but that's because of years of being judged over what you eat. I totally get it.

MikeUniformMike · 15/12/2018 13:03

Forget about it but if he does it again tell him that you decide what you eat not him. Or say, "you're right, I don't want to end up like you"

TheQueef · 15/12/2018 13:03

Tyrant. Who is he the chocolate police?
Tell him to get fucked, discreet and polite like. Angry

Kikidelivers · 15/12/2018 13:07

This reply has been deleted

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Livelaughlovetoday · 15/12/2018 13:12

I don’t think that’s fair.

For a long time I’ve accepted people as they are in my life. Made allowances and excuses for their bad behaviour and in many ways accepted responsibility because I know I’m sensitive. Except it made me a garbage can for assholes and I’m done thinking I need to keep my mouth shut.

Because as you say you’ve checked my previous threads!

So you can read another thread.

I’m going to let my skin get a bit thicker!

OP posts:
abacucat · 15/12/2018 13:21

More likely you have had poor boundaries in the past and accepted people as friends who are misogynistic idiots. No he should not have done this. It is none of his business what you eat.

Crinkle77 · 15/12/2018 13:21

kiki did you mean to be so rude? I think the op is justified in taking offence in this occasion. The husband was being at arsehole.

LimitIsUp · 15/12/2018 13:22

A tad unnecessary Kikidelivers

Figgygal · 15/12/2018 13:24

He was an arsehole absolutely

Oblomov18 · 15/12/2018 13:25

People are so rude.
I had someone last night telling me I shouldn't be drinking. Diabetics shouldn't drink. Apparently. Hmm

Kikidelivers · 15/12/2018 13:25

No really, this OP has posted many times about people who have slighted her.

It’s relevant surely?

Stormy76 · 15/12/2018 13:26

He was rude, there was no call for that. Maybe distance yourself from them. Making allowances for bad behaviour does not make you a good friend, it makes you a doormat.

Start to stand up for yourself and don't take shit like that from anyone.

Stormy76 · 15/12/2018 13:28

Does it matter Kikidelivers how many times she has posted. If she doesn't stand up for herself people will take advantage and be rude

MrsStrowman · 15/12/2018 13:31

Diabetics shouldn't drink. Apparently. hmm
To be fair it's not advised as most alcoholic drinks have high carbohydrate/sugar levels and diabetes impacts kidney and liver function as does alcohol. It is however your choice to do so.

Ninoo25 · 15/12/2018 13:31

What a horrible man. Ignore him

diddl · 15/12/2018 13:36

Why didn't you go & get yourself something then?

Presumably he stopped your son buying you chocolate in the shop?-that's what would concern me the most.

Livelaughlovetoday · 15/12/2018 13:39

OMG Kiki, I’m a frequent mn lurker and poster but I wouldn’t be able to piece together all the posts I read and form a profile on someone to make it relevant.

Absolutely right about my boundary issues, this is the lesson I keep learning.

OP posts:
LimitIsUp · 15/12/2018 13:39

I imagine Oblomov knows the do's and don't for her medical condition and makes her own risk assessments

Fromage · 15/12/2018 13:39

Kikidelivers that was a very weird thing to do. If you suspect the OP of having issues of some kind, maybe just close the thread and hide it?

And OP, yes your friend's husband was rude and controlling and weird. I would see her in his absence in future.

PipGoesPop · 15/12/2018 13:40

Kiki Shock mean and unnecessary

PipGoesPop · 15/12/2018 13:42

And OP your friend's husband is rude and an utter cunt. How dare he decide for you.

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marvellousnightforamooncup · 15/12/2018 13:43

Do you have many friends Kiki?

Oblomov18 · 15/12/2018 13:46

MrsStrowman

None of my consultants, and I am currently under the top UK diabetic consultant, have EVER advised me not to drink. They all know I drink.

I haven't seen any recommendations on diabetes UK or any other diabetic website, not to.

Every recommendation is to try and achieve as normal life as possible.

Within reason, and within normal guidelines, I try to eat, behave, drink like any normal, person.

I thought that was the objective? Hmm

I am well aware of all the rules, how drink contains carbs so requires extra insulin, and later can make sugars plummet, so requires monitoring, to stop later hypos. I do all of this without thinking about it.

So, no I don't agree that the advice is not to drink.

To think close friends husband fat shamed me?
To think close friends husband fat shamed me?
OneMoreNameHiccup · 15/12/2018 13:47

Has it hit a nerve because you are overweight?

I'm not saying this to be mean, I used to be overweight and it was something similar that actually kick started me into losing it - a nasty comment about how much I was eating. It hurt because it was true.

Biggest. Favour. Ever. Now size 10, I run marathons and no comment could ever dent my confidence again.

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