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AIBU?

To think free family/ grandparent childcare should be banned?

454 replies

KnightlyMyMan · 12/12/2018 23:41

This is a topic I keep seeing pop up and I can see both sides so wanted to throw it up for discussion.

Reasons I agree;

  • It’s a HUGE and unfair financial advantage for those of us who have unpaid/ free childcare over those who don’t! It’s basically luck of the draw over whether you get to avoid £700-£900 full time nursery fees per child! In every other area of life it seems society is making it less acceptable to discriminate due to family financial status (uni funding - blind interviews) but ‘unpaid internships’ and ‘free childcare’ are two big remaining issues!


  • It takes away jobs and is detrimental to the economy. (If all the children currently being looked after by family were in nursery more money would be spent, contributing to the economy, and more staff would be needed, creating jobs.)



But equally, as someone who does have free grandparent childcare lined up - of course I want to save (huge amounts) of cash and I trust my parents implicitly, no one would care for my kids better! Why should I give my children to strangers (even professionally trained ones) or fork out money I don’t need to?

The topic of childcare came up at work the other day and there was a definite ‘bloody alright for some’ attitude from those colleagues paying for childcare. It seems to be a subject that divides people very strongly!
OP posts:
KnightlyMyMan · 12/12/2018 23:42

my title should have said to wonder if....

OP posts:
Cherries101 · 12/12/2018 23:44

Does that mean banning sahp?

MrsStrowman · 12/12/2018 23:44

So everyone should be in a worse situation because some don't have family support? Meaning having a family is even more the preserve of the wealthy who can afford one income, full time private nursery or nannies?... 🍪

Nubbin · 12/12/2018 23:45

Surely this is just nonsense - how could you ban family care? Are you going to ban sahm as well?

Family care comes with its own pluses and minuses - re control, reliability etc.

FrancisCrawford · 12/12/2018 23:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThatThingYouDo · 12/12/2018 23:47

This is bizarre. How would it even be possible to ban family members from looking after children they are related to?

You're talking about forcing families to pay for childcare despite the fact a grandparent or aunt could step in?

And does that mean we should ban sahp too?

KnightlyMyMan · 12/12/2018 23:49

I mean if you’re a sahp then you’re sacrificing one salary so no I don’t think parent care could be included.

Idk- it just seems that two families could both be on minimum wage- both struggling - but one better off than the other purely because they have a family member able to provide free childcare.

It’s just like kids of wealthy parents having advantages in careers/ home buying ...etc

OP posts:
FrancisCrawford · 12/12/2018 23:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Dotty1970 · 12/12/2018 23:50

As said in the Catherine tate show ..... What a lot of old shit!

KnightlyMyMan · 12/12/2018 23:51

I’m not saying anything should be banned but when you read threads (like I have in the past) where people venomously argue how unfair it is- I’ve always thought - well wtf do you want to happen? Should we ban it?

OP posts:
FrancisCrawford · 12/12/2018 23:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlaaBlaaBlaa · 12/12/2018 23:52

Wow. Should I live in a smaller house because some people might only be able to afford a house as big as mine? What about my car? Should I not go on holiday in case others don't have the funds to go abroad? Where would we stop?

And I say that as someone who pays for full time childcare.

Suze1621 · 12/12/2018 23:52

What a ridiculous thread!

Hedgehogblues · 12/12/2018 23:52

This is absurd. Extended family helping with childcare has been the norm for most of human history.

DownAndUnder · 12/12/2018 23:52

We can’t ban grandparents from having their grandchildren because people are jealous they don’t get free childcare. I doubt it’s bad for the economy, nurseries are full round here and people with free childcare are more likely to work/work more if they have free childcare.

KnightlyMyMan · 12/12/2018 23:52

🤔 I’m not sure what the desired outcome is, or why there’s such a stigma surrounding ‘having free child care’

OP posts:
FrancisCrawford · 12/12/2018 23:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sue51 · 12/12/2018 23:53

Don't quite get your argument .

FrancisCrawford · 12/12/2018 23:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hyppolyta · 12/12/2018 23:54

My parents refused to support me through GCSE and ALevels. At 16 I got a squat place to live, and worked several shite jobs.

Should everyone have to do this as they got a huge and unfair advantage? Nope.

What about those who get private schooling, tutoring, gap years, driving lessons paid for?
Inheritances, house deposits, weddings...
The list is endless.

Some parents help, some dont. Life isnt fair.

Mrskeats · 12/12/2018 23:54

Stupidest thread of the day goes to........

Laineypopps · 12/12/2018 23:55

So really what you are suggesting is total communism where, regardless of your circumstances, everyone gets the same to make it fair?!?

Didn't work for Russia!!

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ghostsandghoulies · 12/12/2018 23:57

Some kids are healthy. Others are not.
Some kids have 2 parents living with them. Others don't.
Some have loving grandparents. Others don't.
Some have parents who have a reasonable mortgage thanks to parental help. Others don't.

Life isn't fair and you can't make everyone's circumstances equal.

KnightlyMyMan · 12/12/2018 23:57

@Francis

I wrote in a comment immediately following my OP- my title should have said *to wonder if...

😞- please RTFT if you’re gonna start ‘making points’

I also said I have free child care and intend to use it. But see such divided opinion on it and can see valid points on both sides!

Unfortunately all I see is one camp saying ‘this is unfair’ (but not really saying what should be done about it. Whilst the other camp say ‘sod off we don’t care and like our extra cash!’

OP posts:
Reallybadidea · 12/12/2018 23:57

Literally the worst thought out argument that I've ever read Hmm

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