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Something really strange just happened

(520 Posts)
InSwamTiddler Mon 10-Dec-18 06:08:35

I’ve NC for this as I’m not sure what to make of it and I’m really confused.
Back story - I was raised Catholic, but I’m atheist now. I work in a science based field and for as long as I can remember I have believed in the factual, empirically provable reality of things. I don’t believe in God or the afterlife, or ghosts / paranormal stuff.

Nearly 9 years ago my dad died. He died very suddenly and unexpectedly at a young age in my childhood family home.

Due to some circumstantial things, I’m currently living back in my family home.
My mum has mentioned a few times over the years that she’s felt my dad’s presence here and I’ve always been openly kind to her about it, but thinking “nope. Your imagination is going crazy because you’re grieving”. She’s mentioned she’s felt pressure on the bed as if someone has sat down on it next to her for example.

Anyway, this morning DP has left for work and I was still in bed. I was listening to him brushing his teeth, then popping the kettle on so I was definitely awake, but a little drowsy.

I felt him get back into bed with me and thought “what’s he doing?”... it’s not unusual for him to pop back into the bedroom and give me a hug or kiss before leaving the house.

I felt the heaviness of him pressed against my back and his arms wrapped around me. There was a heat between my shoulder blades I have never felt before but I wasn’t scared but I knew it wasn’t DP then. I heard the front door open so DP was leaving the house. Then my whole back went tingly a bit like pins and needles but not in an unpleasant way.

When it was happened I felt calm and warm but I’m freaking out now and can’t stop crying. Sounds silly but I feel like it may have been my dad.

I was 100% awake, not dreaming. I leant over and flicked the lamp on straight after.

Does anyone believe in this stuff? I never have but now I’m questioning everything.

Bezalelle Mon 10-Dec-18 06:15:23

Slightly weird, no?

Alfie190 Mon 10-Dec-18 06:15:49

I am curious you refer to being aethiest. That is about believing in god isn't it, I think you can not believe in god but still believe in ghosts / afterlife.

Anyway, yes I believe in this stuff, although I have no personal experience of it.

TinyRick Mon 10-Dec-18 06:18:33

Most likely sleep paralysis.

WaterBird Mon 10-Dec-18 06:18:36

That's a very touching experience.
I've never believed in ghosts or had this happen to me, but then when you think about it, in the olden days people like Joan of Arc received visions and messages that their peers did not.

Saisong Mon 10-Dec-18 06:20:53

Sounds like an episode of sleep paralysis. They can be terrifying and very convincing.

Aquamarine1029 Mon 10-Dec-18 06:20:59

I'm an atheist, but I know from experience how powerful the human spirit can be and "God" has nothing to do with it as far as I'm concerned.

Littlelambpeep Mon 10-Dec-18 06:21:32

I am catholic (lapsed) and also would be more scientifically minded than religious but maybe it was your dad. I don't know flowers .. Hope you are ok. Don't really know what to say.

InSwamTiddler Mon 10-Dec-18 06:22:41

I’ve never believed in either. I’m a trained psychologist (no longer practicing, career move) so I’m always so logical about these things.
If something was telling me this I would be saying
- you’ve had the trauma of an unexpected death
- it happened in the home you’re in
- you must have been coming round from a dream and your subconscious and reality are being confused

However I know I was awake! I’d had a conversation with DP, plugged my phone in on the charger etc all before this happened.

I can’t explain this. I physically felt someone there, but obviously no actual person was there hugging me.

The sensation wasn’t anything I’ve ever felt before either, I knew it wasn’t another human being... and the warmth then the pins and needles?! It was so bizarre but not scary. I felt like a baby being comforted.

I’m rambling, sorry. I’m upset and confused

Autumnfairy82 Mon 10-Dec-18 06:24:17

I lost my Dad in September to cancer. I took my DD (21 months) to my Nan’s house a few weeks back and my DD pointed at a chair and said “Grandad” and kept smiling at this chair and waving at it. Not done that before or since.
When he was alive my Dad used to smoke. At a similar time to the experience at my Nan’s house I was in my kitchen very late one evening and could suddenly smell cigarette smoke very strongly. There was no explanation for it. We had no windows open and when I checked outside there was no one out there / no cigarette smell. I can’t explain it but I like to think it was my Dad just letting me know he’s there.

InSwamTiddler Mon 10-Dec-18 06:24:21

Not sleep paralysis as I moved and had been awake for some time.
This is why I’m finding this so odd.
I’ve had sleep paralysis before, this was different. I could move and normally when I’ve had sleep paralysis my jaw is locked shut

FaFoutis Mon 10-Dec-18 06:34:58

It sounds like a good opportunity to take on a more open-minded world view.

Extrastout Mon 10-Dec-18 06:39:37

2 years ago, I moved into my late grandmother's home.

Very often in the mornings, I would hear the doorbell ring/ a knock at the bedroom door.

I'd get up and answer, or shout out, but nobody was ever there (outside or inside).

I like to think that it was my grandmother being appalled at me still being in bed at 10am and trying to wake me up.

I never felt afraid at all. I just sort of know who it was.

I'm a struggling Christian with very little faith if any in a God. This however felt like she was there. She had a lot of devilment in her too when alive, so probably relished waking me up. I have never experienced it since I moved out of the house.

BertrandRussell Mon 10-Dec-18 06:41:05

Honestly, Tiddler, it was a dream. It's incredible how real these things appear. And your mum talking about it got your subconscious all ready to produce this experience for you. You said yourself you were al little drowsy. Get yourself up and showered and dressed and go outside. Change the scene and it will start to put itself where it should be-a comforting dream about your dad.

stopfuckingshoutingatme Mon 10-Dec-18 06:44:41

There are powers we don’t know about . You know this was was a lovely and loving ghost thing to happen
So whether it was real or imagined try to accept it . And move on ? I mean nothing will ever be under stood here so put it down to a very strange experience ?

luckybird07 Mon 10-Dec-18 06:44:44

I had this once. It was sleep paralysis.

recently Mon 10-Dec-18 06:45:26

I think it could be your mind wanting to be comforted but what do I know? I am also an atheist (lapsed Christian) and was going through some really bad things a few years back and decided to pray to the Virgin Mary (why??? that's not even a thing in my old church!) I asked for her help and suddenly felt warm, calm and an immense feeling of comfort come over me. Now, I think it was my brain - but also think that feels really ungrateful! It's confusing.

itsnowthewaitinggame Mon 10-Dec-18 06:49:46

I hate whoo stuff generally as firmly believe that our departed loved ones are with God and have no reason to come back to us. However saying that I know that I have experienced something very similar. I was so dismayed that I talked it over with a priest. His thoughts were that nothing is impossible, we do not understand everything and if it brought comfort to take this as a gift

WereYouHareWhenIWasFox Mon 10-Dec-18 06:51:13

Our minds are very powerful and sometimes imagine impossible things.

zzzzz Mon 10-Dec-18 06:54:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

gladheart Mon 10-Dec-18 06:56:23

Even if it was a dream/sleep paralysis or whatever, maybe tell your mum. She might find it comforting.

Veterinari Mon 10-Dec-18 07:00:55

It could easily be a hypnopompic sleep hallucination. Your subconscious has been primed by your Mum’s Story
www.nhs.uk/conditions/hallucinations/

Princesspeachy0 Mon 10-Dec-18 07:02:28

I don't know if I was a dream or not but I do think it's lovely to think it could be your dad. I hope ur ok Op. I agree to telling ur mum smile

InspectorIkmen Mon 10-Dec-18 07:08:44

nothing is impossible, we do not understand everything and if it brought comfort to take this as a gift

This. What a nice and wise thing to say. Definitely this.

Buggeritimgettingup Mon 10-Dec-18 07:12:50

As a cynic I think if it brought you comfort when you needed it then all.is good

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