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to be annoyed about headmistress closing school car park?

(96 Posts)
Pagetta Tue 20-Nov-18 09:41:22

My son goes to breakfast/after school club 7.30 until 6. I work full time and husband is based 200 miles away (military) so the extended clubs are an absolute godsend.

The headmistress has asked that parents don't use the teachers carpark (directly in front of the school) for pick-ups drop-offs. However I must admit that if I drop off before 7.45 I do use it because I have the two year old with me and I can leave him in the car while I drop off. It’s not just a time and convenience thing, it’s also that the other option is to park opposite the school over the road, which although not super busy at that time is a fast country road. Crossing it with a toddler and 6 year old is not easy before lollipop lady starts!

At that time there are generally only two cars parked in the car park, and it is very very rare I see another teacher arriving during drop-off. If I get there after 7.45 when teachers start arriving I don't use it so as not to get in their way, and if I don't have toddler with me I don't use it as its unnecessary.
If I’m honest I really don't see the harm.

However the headmistress has obviously got annoyed - whether it’s just with me or with lots of people I'm not sure (there are only 3-4 parents drop off before 7.45) - as this morning when I got there she had closed the gate so you couldn’t pull in.

This has really annoyed me as I understand it’s a teachers car park, but when no teachers are there what's the issue?
Also, there is a Pilates class at 5.45pm in the school hall every night, and they use the car park. So its ok for them to use the car park AFTER teachers go home, but not me and a few others for 5 minutes before they start?

I don't want to be THAT parent that kicks up a stink - maybe I am being precious? I do get that at the end of the day it’s my problem not theirs – rules are rules – but this does seem likes rules for rules sake. Could they not say "its a teacher's car park from 7.45 until 5.30"?
This is mostly just a rant as I know I’ve not really a leg to stand on – but AIBU to be a bit hacked off about this??!

user187656748 Tue 20-Nov-18 09:42:38

You're being that parent. You are not a special case. Follow the rules.

MrsStrowman Tue 20-Nov-18 09:44:13

YABU they have made it clear the car park is not for parents, that includes you

Seniorcitizen1 Tue 20-Nov-18 09:46:48

Another parent who thinks the world revolves around their “needs”

BookwormMe Tue 20-Nov-18 09:46:52

It might also be an insurance/health and safety thing - if there's an accident and a child is hurt in the teachers' car park, the school will be liable, when drop off should be a parental responsibility.

Pagetta Tue 20-Nov-18 09:48:23

Fair enough - I do see rules are rules.

(No i don't think i'm special or world revolves around my 'needs' - i do see rules are rules - that was what i was asking - i guess i just don't see the issue before teachers start school. not just for me but for anyone .)

minisoksmakehardwork Tue 20-Nov-18 09:51:04

Perhaps it's a safeguarding thing which prevents you from leaving a child alone in the car.

Perhaps teachers coming in later are finding parents who drop off for wrap around care are blocking the car park.

Either way, if it's a designated staff car park, the headmistress can prevent access to anyone who isn't staff.

Would you expect to park in it at normal pick up and drop off times so you can leave your 2 year old in the car?

If getting your youngest out of the car at that time is that much of an issue, speak to the head and explain your predicament. They may ask you how you expect everyone else manages. Or they might say it's ok as long as you aren't there after X time.

ShotsFired Tue 20-Nov-18 09:52:47

If there is a breakfast club from 7.30am, it stands to reason it must be worthwhile, so I imagine there are a lot more parents than "3-4" dropping off.

It's like with blocking driveways - you are just one person for 2mins, but to the owner, you are the hundredth person this hour/day/week and it's infuriating.

howabout Tue 20-Nov-18 09:53:28

YABU. It is not just about leaving the car park free for teachers to use. If you swing in and out of the teachers' car park then you create a hazard twice for all the DC and their families following the rules and approaching on foot. It would never just be you doing it.

Read back your Op and see if any of it makes you special as opposed to THAT parent.

SendintheArdwolves Tue 20-Nov-18 09:53:51

I know what you mean about rules for rules sake and on the face of it, the school seems to be a bit petty - but maybe there are ramifications that you aren't aware of?

The most likely explanation is that the teachers can't use their car park because of all the parents dropping off. Yes, you are early, not in anyone's way and just one person, but I bet there are hoardes that turn up ten minutes after you and "just" take two minutes to drop their kids off. So it's easier to just have a rule that says "no parents in the staff car park" than trying to make everyone use common sense and be thoughtful, cos, y'know...thats the rule they've got at the moment and it's not working.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo Tue 20-Nov-18 09:55:29

I think it's fine when it's that early to be honest.

Pagetta Tue 20-Nov-18 09:56:19

there is a lollipop lady there from just before 8am which we use if there later.

Genuinely I asked this because i get pretty stressed in mornings so although I think its really not a problem to pull in at that time, I'm aware it may just be because i'm a bit wrapped up in my own stress and wish there was an easier way to commute! I think unanimous decision is get over myself lol!

CocoCharlie83 Tue 20-Nov-18 09:59:25

YABU and you are that parent.

You don't know the comings and goings of every parent which uses the car park every day so maybe there have been issues with other parents causing issues. Also there may be H&S issues (such as people leaving there children unattended which they drop pupils off) and/or insurance issues.

Sirzy Tue 20-Nov-18 10:02:50

If they let breaslfast club parents use it it becomes very hard to put in a cut off - the parent who normally parks there at 740 but arrives just after your 745 cut offdue to a stressful morning would still want to park where they normally do. And if x can so can I etc.

Much easier to say “no parents to use the car park”

BottleOfJameson Tue 20-Nov-18 10:03:19

I actually think YANBU the problem is that while you're considerate and only use it when it's not a problem it's a slippery slope. If people use it before 7:45 then people will start using it at 7:50 and then stopping to have a chat with their friend so they're not back at their car until 8:05 and a teacher's been circling the car park unable to park.

Bombardier25966 Tue 20-Nov-18 10:03:24

It might be quiet when you go, but where do they draw the line - five minutes later, ten minutes? Far easier to say no dropping off in car park than to set a time, which just gives (other) parents another reason to moan.

allhdghd Tue 20-Nov-18 10:03:59

I don't want to be THAT parent

You already are...

SuburbanRhonda Tue 20-Nov-18 10:04:29

I think it's fine when it's that early to be honest.

It’s irrelevant what you think. It’s not allowed.

IceRebel Tue 20-Nov-18 10:05:07

Much easier to say “no parents to use the car park”

Agreed. Schools have a lot to deal with. If this is one less thing to take up their time, then a blanket ban on parents is the easiest route to take.

BettyBoooooo Tue 20-Nov-18 10:05:27

I work in a school.,The problem is that many so parents take the piss so blanket rules have to be introduced. If you tell parents they can't park after 745, they will park at 750 and then they'd be saying AIBU to think 5 minutes is no big deal and so it goes on. Have you thought that perhaps teachers are also stressed and don't want the risk of running over a small child when they get to school?

At my school hours are spent every week dealing with this kind of thing. That's taxpayers' money meant for children's education.

YetAnotherSpartacus Tue 20-Nov-18 10:10:42

Sometimes rules are stupid and petty and it sounds like in this case it's that kind of rule, especially since it puts children's lives at risk re busy road. A more sane rule would be a 10 minute drop-off rule - but too many people who like rules rather than solutions to problems would not countenance that.

CynthiaRothrock Tue 20-Nov-18 10:10:45

Yabu. I work in a school and a big part of my job is security and safety(locking gates/manning the car park). I have the same arguments everyday. "We're only 5 mins late/early why can't we go throigh that gate" or "but its only for 5 min i don't see the problem".
Volunteer at the school and see how much of a PITA parents like you are! Park over the road like everyone else and teach you kids road sence from an early age! It is a PRIVATE car park, you have zero rights to be in there at ANY point of the day unless invited!

Foxyloxy1plus1 Tue 20-Nov-18 10:11:16

I’m surprised there is space in the car park at 7.45. Most teachers will already have been in their classrooms for a while. If the head has made the decision, them’s the rules.

The Pilates class at 5.45 may well be paying for the spacethey use. I know that some of the classes I go to are held in school halls, for which the school is paid.

I think you’ll have to suck it up.

AlexanderHamilton Tue 20-Nov-18 10:13:15

The Pilates class will definately be paying for the space and car parking may form part of that contract.

Gingerrogered Tue 20-Nov-18 10:16:59

I have a six year old and two year old twins, even I could cross a road with them, don't know what you're complaining about.

The logical solution would be to bring a lift folding buggy in the boot, put toddler in it and take them with you. Perfectly safe. So it's definitely not a safeguarding issue, it's a too bloody bone idle to walk a short distance to school or deal with a pushchair issue.

Stop being so damn lazy. There will be a lot of other parents in your situation who will cope, whay can't you? Just get up a bit earlier so you have time to deal with the walk and pushchair,.

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