I'm expecting to be told IU but I really don't think I am.
DP came home the other night, there had been no issues before hand, as soon as he walks through the door he says 'we are going to fall out. I have been asked by A to go with A and B on holiday to X and I'm going'.
I took my DP to X last year for his birthday so he doesn't even want to go there, he is going to ask the friends to change the destination. But the way the message was written by A is 'Me and B are going to X, want to join?' it would be for a friday-sunday (around work) in January.
So it's annoyed me for a few reasons:
- his approach was rude and very selfish.
- we have a small puppy together, there seems to be the expectation that I will then just look after her that weekend, there was no 'do you mind because you will look after her and i'll do one weekend when you want to go away'
- it felt like a kick in the teeth because i've spent ages and thousands of pounds booking this special birthday surprise abroad for his birthday over Christmas period. I take him every year but it's his 30th so more of the costs fall on me as he said he will not contribute this year since he is 30. I tried to get his friends to come along (all have the money to do so) and they said no, as it's Christmas time I understood so then arranged a surprise birthday party for the week after we get back ( a week before he'd be going to X) his friends seem non-committed and it has really called into question how much these friends care about him.
- we are putting our house on the market and both work full time so viewings can only ever be at the weekend - this means we either write that weekend off (which I think is silly) or I take sole responsibility of ensuring the house is presentable for that time.
- X is one of the most expensive cities in the world, think half pint of beer £12, it prevented us doing much when we went there last year. I am already contributing more to the next house's deposit as I have more money saved.
For any relevance I'm 24 and have only been in work 2 years but in a very good career. I earn minimally more than him, I am always better with money and all responsibility with arranging things is on my shoulders and I just feel taken advantage of in this situation.
Sorry it's so long, but what do you think should happen, what kind of negotiations?
If he'd asked nicely, my first port of call would have been whether or not these friends would either want to go anywhere other than X because if not, it would be pointless as he wouldn't want to go.