AIBU or am.i being a dick

[inmyshoos]

Met someone recently, had a couple of dates, completely blown away by him as really wasn't expecting or looking for anything wow.
He has said some really really beautiful things, so far we have both been really honest and upfront but a lot of our chat is banter. Something I absolutely adore is how funny he is

So we both have very limited free time die to other things, yesterday he told me he has Monday off and is that Monday off, let's arrange a date.

Lots of chat back and forward today and then this jokey message but the main point was our date is looking to let because the weather is looking ideal for his hobby.

I'm probably already over invested but it upset me. Felt like he'd had a better offer and because none of pur pre pious jokes are at my expense I assumed sincere.
He has since sent a message suggesting he was clearly joking but I just don't find that funny at all. All it does is give me doubt where previously I had none.

AIBU? Is it funny and I'm being a dick? My exh was a selfish b and I was never a priority in his life so I am open to the idea that I'm over sensitive and tbh i like this guy and dont want to ruin it.

[inmyshoos]

Shit sorry so many typos!!

I'm off Monday, he's off.

None of our previous jokes...

You get the gist I'm sure

[inmyshoos]

It's not funny is it? To joke that you have a better offer? Or am I having a sense of humour fail??

[sackrifice]

No, not funny.

[CrispbuttyNo1]

Is the hobby something you can participate in? Is it going to take up how full day?

[inmyshoos]

Actually now im not sure if it's a joke or not. But i suppose if its not a joke better to know now because that is not cool.

[keepingbees]

Sorry I don't understand the bit 'our date was to let' ?

[hellsbellsmelons]

It depends how it was done really.
Usually if you don't laugh, then it's not funny.
But we all have a different sense of humour.
He was joking.
Accept that he was joking.
Don't read too much into it.
Go out on Monday for a nice date and take it from there.
Stop over-investing.
Enjoy each date as it happens!

[RCohle]

So he's cancelled your third date to do his hobby instead because the weather's suitable for his hobby (or at least joked about it)?

[MissingSummer]

So if I understand correctly you planned a date, but he joked the weather would be ideal for his hobby, but didn't actually cancel on you? Or did he cancel on you? If he actually cancelled I'd be a bit peeved, but if he was just joking about the weather being ideal, I'd probably let it go this time.

[inmyshoos]

Wow, I actually thought it was a joke but now it's looking like it wasn't.
Oh well always better to know sooner rather than later.

[DaffoDeffo]

so he sent you a funny message joking that the weather was good and he could do his hobby? did he put a wink or anything at the end to suggest he was joking?

you like him because he's funny, so he was funny, now you don't think he's funny?

I think you're overthinking this. A lot.

[DaffoDeffo]

so it wasn't a joke and he's not coming?

it does sound a bit confusing. Sorry if he's upset you :(

[Hubblebubbletripletrouble]

what did he actually say word for word? was this by text?

[inmyshoos]

No it wasn't a joke. He's now saying he is cancelling because he has the chance to do his hobby and I'm being uncool.
Ah well.... I'm out

[BumbleBeee69]

have you taken the day off specifically for this date OP

he's being quite unfair

[morningconstitutional2017]

If he was really into you, you'd be the better offer, surely? Could this be history repeating itself for you, relationship wise? Maybe you should be looking around for a better catch.

[ArchbishopOfBanterbury]

Ask him straight "Are you joking, or have you really ditched me for a better offer?"

[hellsbellsmelons]

Ohhh.... well that's a totally different thing.
He's passing up a date he already planned with you, basically, for a better offer.
Not OK.
Glad you are out OP.
Better to see true colours early on before you get too invested.

[RCohle]

At least you've found out now OP. Well rid.

[inmyshoos]

He is doing his hobby on the Sunday. Weather improving into the Monday so now seeing as he is there and its a couple of hours drive he is going to stay and spend his day off doing his hobby on the Monday rather than see me.
Tbh his message has upset me because he really can't see why that is a bit hurtful. He's like wow red flag, that's so uncool and sad.. Fuck that. I'm past the point in my life of wanting to be around people who make me feel unimportant. No thank you.

But gutting. As I really really liked him. Have had such a giggle with him.

[StormTreader]

Youve said a lot of your chat is banter, this does sound like standard jokey teasing to me. Its relationship early days, you both have to tell each other whats not ok when it comes up because he doesnt know yet.

[StormTreader]

Oh just seen the rest, I'm sorry :( At least you know now you wouldn't have been the priority you should be.

[inmyshoos]

mirrivan sorry it's a combo of adrenalin and typing on phone!!

He arranged yesterday to see me Monday.
Today he said as weather improving he is just going to do his hobby seeing as he is there on Sunday, it makes sense. To me it tells me we are on different pages, or even different books.

[Bluntness100]

To be honest, I didn't get the gist either.

So you were planning to meet up Monday to do something, you've only met him twice, he's said as the weather will be good he will do his hobby instead, and you have decided to dump him because of it?

Is that correct?