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AIBU?

Christmas - the MN way

115 replies

cathf · 14/11/2018 12:16

When did it become a 'thing' to compete with others about how low-key/crap you make make Christmas? With added bonus points for ramming your self-styled ethical credentials down people's throats at every available opportunity?
There are loads of threads running at the moment, pulling apart others' festive traditions and indulging in one-upmanship in reverse.

A true MN Christmas must follow these rules, it seems:

  1. No Elf on the Shelf they are vulgar and modern
  2. No Christmas Eve Box - they are also vulgar and modern and no-one needs one pair of pyjamas a year, that is wasteful. CEB may be allowed if filled with twigs and leaves from the garden.
  3. In extremis, an Advent calendar with pictures only MAY be allowed. No chocolate, certainly no present-type advent calendar. Although for some reason, Playmobil and Lego calendars seem to be permitted. A reverse advent calendar to collect food for foodbanks is certainly allowed, but only if you make sure everyone knows you are doing it.
  4. Nothing that you usually use is permitted in a Christmas design - so absolutely no to Christmas duvets, towels and most especially festive-scented handwash. The fact that you would be buying eg handwash anyway is brushed over in a bluster of eco-virtue signalling.
  5. Grandparents are not allowed to buy gifts, especially paternal grandparents. They need to be gently told that the children don't need anything but their time and attention. The children are absolutely fine with this .
  6. Something you want (as long as it's wooden and sustainable), something you need (but no pyjamas - see above), something you use and something to read (we can all agree on this one - cue competitive bookworm comments)


Honestly, when did we become so joyless?

I feel duty-bound to caveat this with I won't be doing half of these things for various reasons but am I alone in getting fed up with reading the hierarchy of frugality from people who are convinced their way is the best way and everyone else must be shown how wrong they are?
OP posts:
EssentialHummus · 14/11/2018 12:26

I think it’s an inevitable response to the over the top, fun fun fun, you need all this stuff and squillions of presents message that the shops peddle. Christmas can feel overwhelming and it’s hard to step away from what everyone else is doing/buying to figure out what you need/want.

Allergictoironing · 14/11/2018 12:36

You will also get the people who make every single item for XMas dinner from scratch, everything must be organic, the world would end if they can't get some obscure ingredient for an exotic "side" that hardly anyone has heard about. Anything other than a free range rare breed turkey fresh from the butcher is completely unacceptable. Every single taste must be catered for with some things (e.g. 23 different veg) but other things are sacrosanct and no replacements to be considered (e.g. XMas pudding),

IlikebigbotsandIcannotlie · 14/11/2018 12:36

I know, the thread last night where the later wanted to be completely alone On Christmas Day and Boxing Day and how dare her awful SIL suggest she spends it with them seemed peak MN to me!

mummyinmanchester · 14/11/2018 12:40

Hate that four gift rule it's so twee!
We will only be giving four gifts but they will be four things that he wants!

PositiveVibez · 14/11/2018 12:40

So bloody true OP 😂.

There aren't half some misbags about, whose only joy is judging and moaning at other people for wanting to make a fuss of their kids and make merriment over the festive period (oh and spending money).

MyShinyWhiteTeeth · 14/11/2018 12:44

I had an 'Alone at Christmas' a few years ago! I wouldn't like to do it every year but I have to admit - I really appreciated putting my feet up, putting on a good film and drinking my port and nibbling at cheese and cake.

BertramKibbler · 14/11/2018 12:45

People like to feel superior, no one listens to them in real life so they preach on here.

KurriKurri · 14/11/2018 12:49

I don't know why anyone has to comment on how other people spend Christmas - I think live and let live, so I'm not keen on any threads that say people who are low key are miserable and joyless, or on threads that say people who like to go all out are extravagant and OTT.
Each to their own.

MN is huge - everyone is different - for the couple of hundred who post on an 'Elf on the Shelf' is silly thread - there are thousands who really couldn't care less what everyone else is doing.
And this fantasy that everyone on MN has organic rare breed peacock garnished with Swan for christmas lunch, and spends £££££ on gifts, because all MNers are rich and posh is equally ridiculous.

The vast majority of people on MN are just ordinary people going about their ordinary lives in their own way and doing Christmas however they see fit.

There is no 'MN' Christmas - there are a few people on a few threads moaning about how others do things,
Any threads criticising in either direction, are just people trying to find ways of shitting on others choices.

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 14/11/2018 12:49

Hahaha!!!

I bloody love Christmas, but there will never be an elf on the shelf- not because I think they are vulgar and modern- but they creep the shit out of me.

iwantasofa · 14/11/2018 12:49

"people who are convinced their way is the best way and everyone else must be shown how wrong they are"
Like you, you mean? As you're demonstrating, by starting this thread?

BertramKibbler · 14/11/2018 12:50

Just imagine an elf atop a banana

VenusOfWillendorf · 14/11/2018 12:50

YANBU OP, merely reading in the wrong Topic. You need to head over to the 'Christmas' topic - appropriately under "Fun and Games" - where people have a proper appreciation and respect for all things Christmas.
The "Poncetastic Christmas' thread is particularly joyful [santa] Grin

BertramKibbler · 14/11/2018 12:51

My handwash thread WAS in Christmas

Didiusfalco · 14/11/2018 12:54

That did make me smile op Smile so true. There's always been an element of competitive frugality on mn, but now there is an added eco-warrior element - it's not that it's wrong, but it is a bit tiresome when every other thread seems to be banging on about it.

BarbaraofSevillle · 14/11/2018 12:55

But not having those things doesn't make Christmas 'crap'. Some of us are drowning in stuff and the thought of buying, exchanging, and receiving even more is exhausting, depressing and something we'd be a lot happier not to participate in.

I like Christmas, but the Christmas I like involves time off work, nice food and drink, time with friends and family, a tree with the same decorations each year, no angst about themes or having to buy new decorations every year.

I don't want a load of stuff I don't want given to me because I'll then have to get rid of it and feel guilty about the waste, or have it clutter up my house. And I don't want to trawl the shops to find decent stuff to buy for others amongst all the pointless shitey overpriced crap.

LaDilettante · 14/11/2018 12:55

I think it’s just an elaborate covert campaign to advertise the new Grinch movie.

ShreddedBanksy · 14/11/2018 12:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BarbaraofSevillle · 14/11/2018 12:56

Sorry, forgot to say that many people, especially women, run themselves ragged every Christmas, trying to make an ever increasing amount of Christmassy things/experiences etc happen and it's a good thing to take a step back and think about whether these things are actually wanted.

Emma765 · 14/11/2018 12:56

There's also the thread about his distasteful it is to post a pic of the tree with gifts around it in social media. It's crass and a class thing, apparently.

So many threads based on looking down on others. I'm happy that no one in my real life is so joyless and I'm unsure whether this is just the type of people attracted to online forums like Mumsnet, or whether it's the anonymity that allows them to bring out their miserable side.

RedSkyLastNight · 14/11/2018 12:56

I couldn't care less if individuals want to do Elf on the Shelf or Christmas Eve boxes (and I wasn't aware that either of these were even a thing before MN) but I am shocked by the amount of "stuff" that some people seem to buy for Christmas and think is normal. But that's because I can't see the point of consumerism for the sake of it and, of late of course, it's started to be highlighted what environmental impacts this has. Yes, this is my personal view.

I've stopped reading Christmas threads because too many of them start "I've bought some bits for DS " but now I need to think of his main present - any ideas?" Too many people who can't afford it or really would rather not get caught up in the hype.

DanielRicciardosSmile · 14/11/2018 12:57

To be fair though, those elf dolls are horrendously creepy.

JaneJeffer · 14/11/2018 13:01

But cath low-key is the perfect excuse for a lazy arse like me not to have to do any of that stuff.

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PiperPublickOccurrences · 14/11/2018 13:02

OP you are, in the nicest way possible, talking shite.

There is no ONE way of doing Christmas. There are no rules. Some people don't even celebrate it at all.

Personally, I think the way that ALL occasions are going in the UK is pretty crap. It's less about doing things and more about buying things. The more "stuff" you can buy means a better Christmas according to many. People on other threads are feeling sorry for children who don't have all the fads, the christmas bedding, the elves and the rest of it.

We are quite literally drowning the planet with our throwaway attitude to celebrating and that's nothing to celebrate about! Yes we'll have chocolate advent calendars and nice food and presents. Yes we'll be asking grandparents for Go Ape vouchers or similar and we definitely won't be having elves on shelves and christmas eve boxes because I think it's excessive and pointless.

Caprisunorange · 14/11/2018 13:04

So true! Excellent post OP. I love all the “oh so commercial so much pressure oh oh oh” faux angst. Well sorry if you can’t handle a bit of advertising and discussion without feeling the pressure Grin Your life must be really hard

WatchThisThread · 14/11/2018 13:09

What's this about an Elf on a Shelf??

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