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To find it really distasteful to take photos of your children’s gifts?

(226 Posts)
StarfishSandwich Sun 11-Nov-18 21:29:50

I’ve noticed a trend on Facebook for mums to post photos the night before their child’s birthday of a big pile of wrapped up gifts. Or just as bad, after the event posting a picture of a big pile of opened gifts.

Since when does anyone want to see pictures of presents? It feels really tacky and showy.

LightastheBreeze Wed 14-Nov-18 05:32:04

Its all sounds not dissimilar to back when camcorders were very popular and when you visited people they showed you their holiday videos. I suppose at least you don't have to use Facebook whereas it was hard to escape sitting through relatives holiday videos.

Fortunately I don't use Facebook.grin

LokiBear Wed 14-Nov-18 06:16:39

In my camera real there is usually a picture of the kids presents set out in to piles. Ive never considered it anything other than a 'before' shot. There is always a picture of a decorated tree too. I upload an album of pictures every Christmas/birthday/holiday, special occasion. My parents and grandma, ils and aunts and uncles like to see.

wanderings Wed 14-Nov-18 07:34:38

@LightastheBreeze My parents refused to buy a camcorder because of having been made to see other peoples videos, and cine films.

Snog Wed 14-Nov-18 08:03:00

Isn't most of FB about bragging anyway?

It is tough to see pictures of people who have stuff that you wish you could afford yourself but that goes just as much for holidays, days out etc and is just as bad in RL surely?

LightastheBreeze Wed 14-Nov-18 08:07:35

I have often wondered why there is such a big queue at Pandora after Christmas, it is so obviously people returning all their tat after photographing it for the Christmas pile, like an on loan for Facebook thing.

ArcheryAnnie Wed 14-Nov-18 13:56:47

I know wonderful people who enjoy their children's happiness

This is the problem, right here - characterising a photo on FB of a Dudley Dursley mountain of landfill crap presents, no children in the photo, as "enjoying their children's happiness".

A mountain of presents doesn't equal happiness.

Taking a photo of said mountain of presents doesn't equal happiness.

Strangers seeing that photo of a mountain of presents isn't happiness.

If you need to post these kinds of photos on FB in order to "enjoy your child's happiness" then you have a problem.

ProfessorMoody Wed 14-Nov-18 15:59:26

A pile of presents brings happiness to me. Happiness that I'm still alive to see another Christmas with my family. Happiness that I've been able to manage to buy the presents. Happiness at the effort I've made in selecting things that I know my family will love. Happiness that I've spent time wrapping and decorating to make them look beautiful. Happiness that everyone is there with me to celebrate opening them. Happiness that some are for me and at the kindness and thought others have shown me.

FredFlinstoneMadeOfBones Wed 14-Nov-18 16:07:28

I don't mind if people do it but do think it comes across as OTT materialism (and I like presents as much as the next person). I also know grown adults who will show off their expensive gifts with a photo on facebook of all the gifts they got. I'm really not jealous as they're usually things I could afford or DH would be happy to buy for me. I just wonder at their motivation for posting a pile of jewellery and designer clothes all laid out. Surely only 2-3 people max are going to be interested and other people might feel bad.

FredFlinstoneMadeOfBones Wed 14-Nov-18 16:09:05

ProfessorMoody

That's great that you enjoy giving presents - everyone does but why post it on Facebook? Your friends and family are more likely to be interested in nice pictures of you and the kids actually having fun and enjoying christmas together that's what they're going to remember in years to come not a big pile of presents that will be quickly forgotten.

Racecardriver Wed 14-Nov-18 16:10:42

YANU. Also really tacky to actually buy the massive pile of presents in the first place. One from parents, one from Father Christmas. Anything more is very naff.

Didyeeaye Wed 14-Nov-18 16:45:08

I do think huge piles of presents are a bit ridiculous and generally create spoilt children. I also know plenty of people who feel so under pressure by what they see others doing that they get themselves in debt at Christmas which is ridiculous. I am pagan so celebrate Yule. DS and I have a fun day burning the log, making decorations, giving thanks and having food. He then spend Christmas at dad's surrounded by presents most of which he doesnt bring home and complains Christmas was boring and he prefers Yule probably because we spend all day doing things together whereas he is given gifts and expected to entertain himself on Christmas. (Full disclosure I also usually give him a few gifts on Yule because it is great to see his wee face)

Didyeeaye Wed 14-Nov-18 16:47:52

Oh and it's not just DS that feels this way my DN also spent Yule with me every year until she moved away. She too always seemed more excited by our activities than the gifts x

ProfessorMoody Wed 14-Nov-18 17:02:51

More than two presents is naff? Fuck that 😂

RebelWitchFace Wed 14-Nov-18 17:58:31

Naff to but more than two presents? Oh get over it!

choli Wed 14-Nov-18 17:59:20

It's tacky of course, but tacky seems to be becoming the norm on social media.

MiddlingMum Wed 14-Nov-18 18:06:59

It never occurred to us to take photos of any sort so sadly my DC are deprived. What I do have is me sitting under the tree with my brother in the 1960s with our presents neatly arranged. All very quaint and nostalgic now especially as I still have a couple of the toys.

Fluffythrow Wed 14-Nov-18 18:08:30

It's what FB is for.

Momasita Wed 14-Nov-18 18:17:30

I don't know anyone who does piles of gifts.

I like seeing when people post normal amounts because it's fun. It's lovely the dc has that excitement.
If you only give one or two gifts anything more will seem like a pile though.

GreatDuckCookery6211 Wed 14-Nov-18 18:17:46

It's all part of the attention seeking that goes with FB I guess. Nobody cares how many presents little Johnny has got. It's for the parents to show off.

Momasita Wed 14-Nov-18 18:25:35

did doing craft or making things is truly special, and where deep connections and memories are made. That sounds lovely, really cosy and wintery.

I had v special Xmas growing up, and funnily enough some years the presents were really sparse and rubbish! It depended on my siblings whether they made effort then gifts would be fabulous.

But it was about so much more.. The build up, school play, snow queen or nativity... The lights, decorations... Smells, cakes.. The getting ready... Carols.. Special films and programs on TV. The decorations in the house, the meal, tree... Presents were actually a small part of it.

I dislike however this idea on mn that if you spoil your dc for one day... You create a spoilt child.

Children are educated 365 days a year. One day shouldn't turn a well brought up child who is grateful into The brat.

Also its possible to create, make special memories, go out etc as well as have a decent amount of gifts.

Some people like us don't give gifts at other times of year bar smaller birthday. So gifts we give really do last the year.

My dc often come to last years gifts later on in the year.
These things are not mutually exclusive.

Momasita Wed 14-Nov-18 18:26:57

The people on my fb are people I care for and I do feel genuinely happy when I see fiends and family celebrating with their dc

ProfessorMoody Wed 14-Nov-18 18:36:36

My DS is not spoiled in the slightest. He's bloody awesome - kind, respectful, polite, caring and stands up for his beliefs.

The gifts he receives on Christmas day have no impact on his behaviour. In fact, he's incredibly grateful at how lucky he is. He always asks to donate something to the local toy appeal too, and will grab something from the supermarket every week for the food bank crate at the end.

It's a bit insane that people believe some Christmas presents can change a child's entire personality.

TryItAndDieFatLass Wed 14-Nov-18 19:00:55

I have a Facebook friend who has spent the last month posting every day of her daughter's 30th birthday 30 day lucky Dip. Showing everyone what she has bought for her, it's more than a little over the top.

AiryFairyUnicornRainbow Wed 14-Nov-18 20:41:03

I have loads of pics of my kids at Xmas, when they were little - for my own enjoyment.

I'd have never shared them on social media. It is like those people who share their holiday pictures on social media.

It is bragging, dress it up however you want, but if you are going to treat your kids, do it to please them, not for 'likes'

AiryFairyUnicornRainbow Wed 14-Nov-18 20:42:01

I like seeing the celebration pictures, but not the mountain of presents parents saying OMG ive spent £3,000 on toys

sollyfromsurrey Thu 15-Nov-18 07:08:24

I don't chose to feel negatively towards other people unless they are actually causing hurt. And I don't mean hurt like 'someone might be offended'. Are you upset when someone bakes a cake and shows it? When their child is dressed fabulously for a Halloween? When you are all dressed up to go out for your anniversary? Are those posts 'a bit Braggy' too? Are people who are single or can't bake or don't have kids meant to feel offended?

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