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To take DD to baby group with a cold?

(100 Posts)
voxnihili Mon 05-Nov-18 16:49:49

I'm genuinely asking for opinions as I'm not sure what to do. DD is 3 months old and is getting over a cold. Should we steer clear of baby groups this week? Aside from one unsettled night she's not at all grumbly. I think I'm now starting to come down with it.

My opinion is that's it's just a cold and we should just get on with life. I'm a teacher and would expect children in school with a cold if they're otherwise well. I'd also go to work myself. I feel that if we stay home every time she has a sniffle we'll be home all winter. It's definitely just a cold and not one of those hideous viruses - DP has had it and even his dying duck impressions have been mild compared to his usual attacks of man flu.

WWYD? If she had a fever, sickness, diarrhoea etc I'd definitely keep her home but she's fine in herself.

BaldricksTrousers Mon 05-Nov-18 16:55:56

The way I see it: if it's something you don't have to do (school, work, essential errands, etc), don't go with a cold. Take the time to rest and recuperate. Baby group is not essential.

BusyMum47 Mon 05-Nov-18 17:07:52

Normally I'd agree with you & say if it's just a mild cold & you practice good hygiene whatever possible, then go about your day; you can't live on a bubble etc BUT when it's such a little one & you'll be taking her to a room of other teeny tiny ones, then it's a bit 'off' of you to knowingly share the lurgy. Especially as we all know how hellish it is when your baby is ill & refuses to feed, sleep, etc. Just give it a miss this week.

AmIRightOrAMeringue Mon 05-Nov-18 17:09:38

Are there newborns at the baby group? I think tbh I'd probably just go - my babies have both had constant colds over the winter, if we cancelled stuff due to a cold wed literally never go out the house between October and March

AdventuringThroughLife Mon 05-Nov-18 17:10:33

We were told by the HV that small kids /babies get on average 10 colds a year and unless obviously distressed/thick snot everywhere we should still be out and about or you could never go out! There were posters up about it and everything!

I dont think mine git that many though.

Loobrushesarefuckingrank Mon 05-Nov-18 17:16:24

Ahhh, that's not right to share germs knowingly where there are other little ones. Regardless what the HV say... generally you feel rubbish with a cold. I can imagine it's worse for little ones.
Please don't do it's selfish

Sirzy Mon 05-Nov-18 17:20:19

Colds can be very dangerous for young babies. I wouldn’t knowingly risk infecting others

KatieKittens Mon 05-Nov-18 17:21:43

Take your daughter out by all means, but avoid the baby group this week. It’s not fair on the other families.

It’s a strange logic to think that because it’s not affected your husband badly it means others will react the same. Everyone’s immune system is different.

BlueBug45 Mon 05-Nov-18 17:23:41

Baby group isn't essential and as someone who took a baby a few weeks old to one I wouldn't appreciate it if someone else turned up with a cold themselves or a child clearly with a cold.

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees Mon 05-Nov-18 17:24:24

We wouldnt leave to house between October and March if we stayed at home every time one of my kids had a cold grin as long as your baby has no temperature then don’t stay in, get out in the fresh air it’ll do you both good!

Sexnotgender Mon 05-Nov-18 17:26:20

It’s maybe not made your baby particularly sick but children react differently.

My daughter has a serious heart condition and has been in and out of hospital with pneumonia. A cold can make her seriously unwell.

I wouldn’t knowingly take a sick baby where there were other small babies.

SpottingTheZebras Mon 05-Nov-18 17:26:44

I would stay home at that age. A baby group with a three month old is not for the baby’s benefit and the likelihood is that they would much prefer being at home.

My newborn came into contact with someone who had a, admittedly nasty, cold and she ended up being very ill with bronchiolitis as a result.

Topbiscuit Mon 05-Nov-18 17:31:11

As someone with a child with chronic lung disease from prematurity, a simple cold could land him back in hospital in oxygen. So obviously I’m biased but would never take a child with a cold to a gathering of babies.

gamerchick Mon 05-Nov-18 17:34:20

No, just because you got it mildly doesn't mean another baby wil, then you don't know who they will pass it on to. At that age the group's are more for you anyway. Why would you take a cold to pass on when you don't have to?

Bingolingo Mon 05-Nov-18 17:37:13

I always leave it until we are over the worst. Not only could you spread it to younger babies, your baby will probably catch another one and back to back colds ain’t fun. I know you need to get out though! Maybe go for a coffee instead, a 3 month old won’t know any different.

ApolloandDaphne Mon 05-Nov-18 17:41:08

I am going to go against the grain here. My DD2 constantly had colds as a baby. If i had kept her away from baby groups we would never have gone out for weeks on end plus i had another DD to get out and about so that wasn't an option. I would take a baby with a snuffle out no problems.

voxnihili Mon 05-Nov-18 17:43:11

Thanks for the replies. I've never been bothered about being around people with colds as just see them as part of life but I know others feel differently for a variety of reasons. We won't go though as I don't want to be the parent that everyone is complaining about.

Soiree Mon 05-Nov-18 17:43:59

I'd go with a mild cold, I wouldn't expect people to stay away from my 3 month old just because they had a common cold.

SinkGirl Mon 05-Nov-18 17:45:19

And that’s why a) people with disabled or vulnerable babies can never bloody go anywhere, and b) why kids get sick at every group and every visit to soft play, because some people are selfish.

If your kid is sick and you want to get out of the house, fine. Taking them around other small babies is really selfish.

Even if I didn’t have preemie twins with various health issues, a bog standard cold can easily develop into bronchiolitis with a small baby. I have one friend who’s little boy was in hospital with bronchiolitis nine times in a year.

doodledancing Mon 05-Nov-18 17:46:10

It really annoys me when people think it's ok to go to groups with illness. I have a lot of friends that do this and it spills into play dates too... which makes me very cross especially when they arrive at my house full of germs.
Germs are everywhere but to knowingly attend a group with an infected child is selfish in my opinion. Take your baby for a nice walk in the fresh air if you need to get out.
I'm particularly frosty about this subject as my 6 week old and 2year old are both ill with stinking colds atm. Waking every hour is no fun for anyone.

SleepingStandingUp Mon 05-Nov-18 17:46:17

Thing is OP you don't mind because you've a robust enough immune system. Not everyone has. I stayed from groups for the first winter because I knew people would just turn up with their snot and germs and we'd end up in hospital. You coming down with it, who is more likely to touch stuff, would be a bigger reason to stay home than a baby who will basically stay in your arms

voxnihili Mon 05-Nov-18 17:49:00

Soirée - that's why I'm torn. I wouldn't expect friends and family to stay away with a normal cold. That said, if I was meeting another friend, I'd text them to let them know and leave it down to them. That's not possible with the baby classes we do though. I don't think we'll bother to sign up for them next term though if the consensus is that we should stay home - it sounds like she's going to be getting a lot of colds over the coming months!

SnuggyBuggy Mon 05-Nov-18 17:49:21

Pretty much all the babies at baby group have lurgy. It's an unavoidable part of life.

Cornettoninja Mon 05-Nov-18 17:52:17

I probably wouldn’t but I’m quite lazy (which did me no favours mentally on ML tbh).

I think MN is a different world from where we actually live where people tend to go about their business even with a sniffly baby if they’re generally happy. I actually think reading too much MN hasn’t done me any favours in this regard, people look at me like I’ve a screw loose when I check if things like a cold are okay with them before meeting up.

I really appreciate the lowered immunity in others as a good reason for being careful (and I am, way over and above the norm) but in reality the world just doesn’t operate that way with minor illness.

zzzzz Mon 05-Nov-18 17:53:52

I've never been bothered about being around people with colds as just see them as part of life
That’s nice for you. My baby caught a lurgy at 11 months and it triggered seizures that lead to 54 days in hospital followed by years of life altering medications. Up until that point she was robust and well. Let’s hope no one is similarly generous to anyone else’s child because it’s fucking irresponsible and horrible. Stay away from other small children for a few days. It’s not hard. Surely you have come across the idea of infectious diseases at some point in the last 20 odd years.

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