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Niece has named her daughter the same name as my daughter.

(310 Posts)
GreyEyed Sat 03-Nov-18 20:39:13

My daughter was born 4 weeks ago (still in hospital) as she arrived premature. Niece gave birth yesterday morning and named her the same name (although I'm putting a long version on the BC). I'm a bit hurt tbh. AIBU?

SleepingStandingUp Tue 06-Nov-18 09:07:44

Having been in hospital with a poorly prem baby I'd say you're entitled to feel emotional and pissed off about anything you damn well please, it's all pain trying to fight its way out.

Once you're home with your daughter though, it won't matter. I suspect niece didn't know your name, decided on Madeline and then yours came out first and you claimed it first. If her baby had come before yours would you have changed it? You might have done but you'd be in no way obliged to.


AutumnB Tue 06-Nov-18 09:21:12

* we have named her Madeleine. I don't mind saying it now the thread has gone a little more quiet!*

Oh dear... you might not have posted this if you had known it was going in the daily fail.

Madeleine is a beautiful name.

GreyEyed Tue 06-Nov-18 09:21:14

The Daily Mail!!!???

Yes niece is going with Maddie. We are also calling her Maddie... (until she ofc wants to be called otherwise).

DoingMyBest2010 Tue 06-Nov-18 09:33:50

My brother in-law phoned us whilst I was in the midst of childbirth to tell us they were expecting their 2nd child. Then 6 months later gave her a name which has one letter written differently. TBH it doesn't bother me that much. I think my sister in-law felt awful enough stealing the limelight on my daughter's birthday :-)

Mrspenfold123 Tue 06-Nov-18 09:34:22

Interesting thread helping sort the narcissists - who think the world should revolve around them -from the normal people, who realise anyone can call their child what they like.

loubluee Tue 06-Nov-18 09:35:24

Yes this story is in there sorry

Flamingosnbears Tue 06-Nov-18 09:41:45

I think it's a lack of common sense on her part especially if your going to see each other often however if you've got the longer version I wouldn't worry so much...

Huffabook Tue 06-Nov-18 09:43:06

I think we all realise anyone can call their child what they want .
We also know it's not really the done thing to call your child the same name as your aunt's new baby, who is only 4 weeks old and in hospital still.

IJustLostTheGame Tue 06-Nov-18 09:45:07

I think it's a very hurtful thing to do.

Satsumaeater Tue 06-Nov-18 10:01:24

Can't really see the issue (though not read the full thread)

My uncle has the same name as my cousin (his nephew)

I have a cousin with the same name as my son.

I would have liked my husband's nephew's name for my son but my husband thought that would have been a bit too confusing (and his parents would have ended up with two grandchildren with the same name). But if they are different generations, it doesn't matter.

Twisique Tue 06-Nov-18 10:10:37


PrincessDaff Tue 06-Nov-18 10:36:51

My dp's brother named both of his children names of his cousins. The two cousins are adults but I still found it weird as now my mil and fil have a niece and a granddaughter and a nephew and a grandson with the same name. They are a very close family so it is now "big Bob and little Bob"

I would never do this myself as I wouldn't want my child to be "little" anything.

SimpleSimonstherapist Tue 06-Nov-18 10:44:11

I’d be fuming op. I don’t think you are being precious or hormonal (ffs - women blaming other women’s thought processes they don’t agree with on hormones hmm).

I really hope your scrumptious little dd is home soon with you and your dh, many congratulations to you!

afishnotabird Tue 06-Nov-18 10:49:10

It might be petty, but I'd be calling your niece's daughter Maddie 2 every single time until she was old enough to understand. Then of course I'd stop. Maybe.

Tinty Tue 06-Nov-18 10:54:51

My cousin called her dd the same name as my dd, but cousins dd is 10 years younger than my dd. Cousins dd loves the fact that her older (and cool to her) cousin has the same name. Dd thinks it is cute how much cousins dd loves the fact they have the same name.

MysweetAudrina Tue 06-Nov-18 11:01:21

My sister and I called 3 of our children the same names as 3 of our Aunts children. They were flattered.

PumpkinKitty82 Tue 06-Nov-18 11:08:23

It’s bizarre . When I was picking a name I made sure that it wasn’t the same as anyone in our family and it would annoy me that a close family member had done this.
It’s really odd

2ManyChoices Tue 06-Nov-18 11:09:59

I can go one better, Although I would be livid if my niece did this, my husbands cousin, close family, has called her new PUPPY the same as my youngest child. Good times.

Chalkitup Tue 06-Nov-18 12:33:00

Beautiful name. I called my daughter Francesca on birth certificate but def planned on calling her Frankie because I thought I loved it. As time has passed I've found I only ever use her full name, and the shortened version feels odd, funny how preferences change. You might find you naturally just use her full name.

How many weeks prem was she? X

Venison Tue 06-Nov-18 12:36:29

That's ok, it's illegal to use the same name as anyone else. So just drop an email to the copyright federation and they will provide a name for the neices baby and impose a penalty notice.

SleepingStandingUp Tue 06-Nov-18 12:54:55

Oh Venison you're soooo funny. Wow. Such wit.

Notnowok Tue 06-Nov-18 12:57:33

My bil called his son the same name as my son. He asked if we minded first, which we didn't.
But my bil and his family would call his son Babyjon instead of Jon always! ( the name wasn't jon)
to differentiate between the two boys. I didn't as I have this thing about people becoming their name.
And yes he did, he was so immature and babyish. I'm only commenting to say say how badly this turned out. Bils son is now a very immature teenager following years and years of being called Babyjon.

GreenDinosaur Tue 06-Nov-18 14:02:32

I wonder if the niece will change her DD's name now it's national news that she's a twat for choosing the same one? Someone must have shown her the article by now!

JeanPagett Tue 06-Nov-18 14:14:14

I mean yes no one owns a name, blah blah blah, but it's a bloody weird thing to do.

I'd passively aggressively "joke" about how she copied the name from you with a tinkly laugh every time you saw her.

TheSubtleKnifeAndFork Tue 06-Nov-18 14:36:40

Odd. I'm generally of the view that "anyone can call their baby anything they like" but based on the fact you had named your baby girl this name before she was born, and has not kept that fact a secret. I do think this is perhaps bit off of your niece. Particularly given the circumstances with your baby being prem in hospital. That makes it seem almost cruel.

Of course maybe she did just genuinely love that name more than any other she could think of, and couldn't bear not to use it, but I think if I'd been in her shoes I'd have been thinking hard of alternatives, there are a lot of names out there!

I'm sorry OP, it must be really hard to feel upset by something like this, where there isn't much (anything!) you can do about it.

I hope your daughter is still doing well. flowers

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