For the male member of a couple I worked for two years ago to be randomly messaging me late at night.
I am still in contact with the couple for business reasons. I 'friend' a lot of people on my personal page due to the nature of my business (which they are in agreement with) but invariably, the majority of my contact is through the female party (unless a same sex couple in which case a more considered discussion will take place-otherwise I consider it most appropriate to have the female contact as my first port of call)
I have not spoken to this man directly for around 18 months. All conversations go through his wife. She's lovely and we have become friendly in a relaxed snd 'every now and then friendship' sort of way. All of a sudden over the past 3-4 nights he has 'waved' at me via fb messenger. I have ignored. I am aware there is an outstanding business issue to sign off.
He did it again tonight and I wondered if he was doing it to chase this project I have as outstanding for them. I have had a bit of backlog and I wondered if maybe his wife had asked him to get on to me instead of her doing it. so I messaged saying hi, how are you, I know I need to get some stuff over to you, he made it clear that was not why he was messaging me, so it was obvious he was contacting me for personal reasons.
He didn't say anything inappropriate but it made me feel really weird.
I told my BF about it as I had issues with a previous partner accusing me of having affairs etc (I didn't) if ever I was in contact with men without his knowledge (never ever anything other than friends or business meetings) Bf is lovely. We discussed appropriate responses etc and agreed it's weird and odd that a client should be messaging me like this.
I guess my aibu is why do I feel guilty even though I've done nothing wrong?
Aibu for feeling guilty that I've somehow brought this on myself by not reading signs correctly or misinterpreting things.
I am good at my job. But I would hate to feel that I'd done something to encourage this,
I absolutely haven't. So why do I feel guilty that this man was messaging me behind his wife's back?
Sorry. Bit of a ramble. But it totally freaked me out tonight. Just guess I'm asking for perspective,
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AIBU?
To think that it's not appropriate..
59 replies
gingergenius · 17/10/2018 23:04
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