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Am I breaking the fashion rules of weddings

(61 Posts)
Rosskidsmum Wed 17-Oct-18 14:03:39

I need help, I don’t know if I’ve massively over thought this now or am I going to be hunted down and killed by the wedding fashion mafia?!
Went shopping for my DF cousins wedding this weekend, as it’s now going to be too warm for the suit I was originally going to wear I have purchased cute checked tan tapered trousers and a cream basic Tshirt to go with paired with tan and cream heels I was happy with my look... then I read that you Cannot wear, cream ivory or white to someone else’s wedding! I would never dream of wearing a cream dress to someone else’s wedding but a tshirt will be ok surely? I’ve been out today and panic purchased a black top and blazer instead, but it really doesn’t look as nice 😞 am I massively over thinking this or are people like to pass comment on my colour choice, I would hate to offend anyone.

OrigamiZoo Thu 18-Oct-18 18:19:58

I announced my pregnancy at my cousin's wedding blush- well not at the wedding itself, a couple of days before as it was abroad. I couldn't not really as it was a full on drinking and eating fest and vast amounts of seafood at the reception and I had to ask for different food. It was torture actually as I'm a real foodie and I love my wine too.

I think your outfit will be lovely!

spanishwife Thu 18-Oct-18 17:21:55

I don't think wearing white is abut 'knowing who the bride is', that's nonsense... it's the brides privilege to wear white and you should be respectful enough to give her that on one day.

The bride wears white (99.9% of the time) and in the run up it's all about the dress, what the bride will wear etc, there's so much pressure on this one dress for this special day... It's her day to be the one in white.

DiveBombingSeagull Thu 18-Oct-18 15:09:25

I once wore a white trouser suit to a wedding. With the brides permission. I was 38 weeks pregnant and my options were very limited as I couldn’t fit into anything apart leggings and XHs shirts.

She was wearing a meringue dress (it was the 90s) there was no confusion over who was the bride grin

shearwater Thu 18-Oct-18 15:04:17

I've obviously touched a raw nerve, Stonebake.

I'm not sure that my post was worth five posts plus one from your sockpuppet in response, but each to their own.

Caledonian - it sounds like the photographer was more at fault there than your guest!

Ghanagirl Thu 18-Oct-18 15:02:34

You hijacked a thread to bitch about another woman 🙄
Outfit looks great presuming it’s not a formal wedding.

CaledonianQueen Thu 18-Oct-18 14:56:14

I think the outfit sounds fine! I have worn a lemon shift dress to a wedding that looked cream in some lights. It looked nothing like a wedding dress. I have also worn ivory trousers and a dress top to a wedding that looked nothing like a wedding outfit.

I had a guest wear fishnet stockings, thigh high boots and a mini kilt to my wedding (Scottish wedding, guest from England), other than distracting my photographer so that there were no photos of my Father and I in our lovely Daimler limousine, she was subject to abject horror from our older guests and whispering and tutting for her attire. She went to bed in a huff after the speeches. Now that was an inappropriate wedding guest outfit!

Clarich007 Thu 18-Oct-18 14:02:11

Sorry op i think the whole outfit sounds far too casual for a wedding.More like a shopping trip to town

Stonebake Thu 18-Oct-18 13:59:59

I already said I think this outfit sounds fine, as it’s trousers. But I would always avoid white / cream dresses, even if it’s just a background colour personally. It’s just something I always do and it really isn’t difficult.

TheDowagerCuntess Thu 18-Oct-18 13:56:11

There is nothing 'inappropriate' about a cream satin, short-sleeved top, matched with different colour trousers. Nothing.

Stonebake Thu 18-Oct-18 11:57:01

And anyway, I thought it was made up by “petit bourgeois” mumsnetters, now it’s those ghastly Americans hmm.

<whispers> shearwater, your prejudice is showing shock!

I mean, make stuff up all you like to support your position, but you don’t have to be snobby about it. It just weakens your argument.

Stonebake Thu 18-Oct-18 11:46:56

Ah balls - name change fail! That^^ was me.

As I’ve already said, I heard of this a long time ago. But think what you like. Wear what you like. I’ll do the same.

GertrudeTheGuineapig Thu 18-Oct-18 11:45:20

Ah sorry. Nobody is right but you. I’ll forget I ever had an opinion now. Thank you for correcting me.

shearwater Thu 18-Oct-18 11:25:49

Safe to say it's probably some crap that blew in from the US then.

It would be difficult for me to care less what fashion magazines say. They talk a lot of shit in order to make women feel insecure and sell you stuff.

Stonebake Thu 18-Oct-18 09:30:10

This is (American) Glamour. If you google “can I wear white to a wedding?”, you’ll find a tonne of articles saying pretty much no. It’s not “just on MN”.

Stonebake Thu 18-Oct-18 09:24:42

And, tbh, even if it is made up by petit bourgeois mumsnetters, (lovely classist phrase you chose there btw - they don’t even use that phrase in Paris anymore), I still won’t risk it personally. It’s no skin off my nose to wear a different colour is it? If someone might not like me wearing it on their wedding day, I tend to steer clear. I don’t care how pwetty my dwess is enough to risk annoying someone.

I didn’t care what anyone wore to my wedding btw, including bridesmaids, but I still have the common sense to wear something other than white at someone else’s wedding. It’s a bit self absorbed to insist that I must wear cream because I want to when it isn’t even my wedding.

Stonebake Thu 18-Oct-18 09:19:01

Nah, I’d heard of no white / cream at weddings a very long time ago. Maybe it depends on the area you live in or your particular friendship group.

Do you also think Halloween is a modern American import and made up holiday by any chance?

LynetteScavo Thu 18-Oct-18 06:12:10

"*Not wearing cream/white/ivory" isn't a tradition though, not at any wedding I've been at, it's just made up by socially awkward, insecure, petit bourgeois posters on MN, probably the same ones who launder their towels and linen daily.*
This Two people wore cream shift dresses to my wedding 19 years ago. Both were totally appropriate.

shearwater Thu 18-Oct-18 05:46:11

"Not wearing cream/white/ivory" isn't a tradition though, not at any wedding I've been at, it's just made up by socially awkward, insecure, petit bourgeois posters on MN, probably the same ones who launder their towels and linen daily.

Loads of people wore cream and ivory dresses at my wedding and looked lovely, I was just looking at the photos the other day. I never heard or bothered about it until MN, and I shall continue to ignore it!

Stonebake Wed 17-Oct-18 17:17:22

I don’t get it either nigel, but it’s hust one of those traditions I suppose. Wouldn’t bother me, but it’s equally no skin off my nose NOT to wear white / cream to weddings. So I don’t.

Why should it bother anyone if someone wore something not in keeping with tradition to any place or event? Eg hot pants to the office or to a christening? I mean, why not? No good reason, it just isn’t seen as appropriate.

ShalomJackie Wed 17-Oct-18 17:06:13

Sorry but I think it will look like you have come straight from work

thatmustbenigelwiththebrie Wed 17-Oct-18 16:59:06

I genuinely don't understand why it's frowned upon to wear a white dress as a guest. Everyone knows who the bride is! I wouldn't give a shit if a guest wore a white dress to my wedding.

TheDowagerCuntess Wed 17-Oct-18 16:55:28

It's absolutely fine.

If you're a bride who would mind - have you really nothing better to be doing on one of the best days of your life? Nobody, but nobody will think someone in checkered trousers and a cream satin top is upstaging you.

Stonebake Wed 17-Oct-18 16:44:54

Yeah that isn’t bridal. If anything it might be a little bit casual, but that totally depends on the flavour of wedding.

I love trousers to weddings though. So much more comfortable. Next wedding I go to I want to do the full Cara Delevingne top hat and tails! Don’t think I can pull it off though. I’d make it look bonkers sad.

Rosskidsmum Wed 17-Oct-18 16:44:39

Statement necklace I like the sound of the fidora too smile

Rosskidsmum Wed 17-Oct-18 16:43:20

I was thinking that!

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