AIBU to sometime be extremely jealous of parents with NT kids

[Studyinghell]

Just tht really, not that I’d wish his personality away or anything like that. But when things are hard Im so jealous of parents with NT kids and kids with no medical conditions

[PurpleDaisies]

It’s totally natural to want an easier life for both your sake and his. No judgement here.

[ThisMustBeMyDream]

If you are, then so am I.

I don't have any better response other than I think it's a completely normal feeling.

[MorningsEleven]

I've one NT, he's a dream.

[Squidgee]

Nope.. if you are, then so am I.

II need a break, i'm so tired, I haven't slept properly in 13 years.

[huggybear]

There will be millions of people wishing they had a child at all.

[Isadora2007]

No of course that’s not unreasonable. Not at all.

[steppemum]

Oh sweetheart no judgement from me.

Whenever I see someone parenting a child with additional needs I am struck by how I am seeing just 5 minutes of what for them is 24/7 and how hard that must be at times.

I was thinking about it as I read a thread on sleep this week, as my very good friend had a baby with a medical condition which meant she slept in 40 minute bursts between coughing and needing help. So she didn't sleep properly for about 8 years.

It isn't about your lovely dc. It is about the 100% care 24/7 need, a society that isn't made to fit non NT kids and that as human beings, that is hard.

[immortalmarble]

YANBU.

Huggy, if i knew how what having a child with autism entails, I wouldn’t have had mine.

[Isadora2007]

There will be millions of people wishing they had a child at all.

That doesn’t make having a child who can be challenging or who can find life itself challenging any easier Huggy.

[immortalmarble]

• now

[PutItAwayDear]

Nope.

Not at all. It's very very hard having a child with additional needs and it's made harder still by the bullshit that people make you deal with day after sodding day. And the forms, OMG the forms, the never ending forms of doom that I have to fill in....

I adore my child but his life is going to be much much harder than his siblings, he is going to struggle and face challenges and prejudice that they aren't, and it makes me very sad for him.

[EwItsAHooman]

There will be millions of people wishing they had a child at all

And that's sad for them but it doesn't negate how very fucking hard it is raising a child with disabilities and/or complex needs.

[ImSoExhausted]

I get it. I often wish people knew how difficult it was. I get increasingly annoyed with the 'spectrum' my child's disability falls under.
As a family, we're excluded from all the 'friendly' activities because DS is too disabled to cope. It infuriates me, then I feel like a terrible person for even thinking that those other kids don't have 'real' struggles, because they do, as do their parents. It's just not as bad as my DS.

[SpringerLink]

Not at all. I love me neurodivergent DC, but I still envy how much easier it is for parents of only NT children.

I also feel very sad for my NT child sometimes that they will not have the same sibling relationship that other children get.

I think it’s very common to feel that way.

[DroningOn]

What's NT?

[EwItsAHooman]

NT= neurotypical, i.e., "normal"

(I mean "normal" as in the societal norm).

[CrochetBelle]

I'll be unreasonable too then.
Another day of fucking fighting everything and getting fucking nowhere.

I wonder how nice it would be to send a child off to school on their merry way and know things were well.

[Betsy86]

I hear you op your not alone x

[twoheaped]

I take my hat off to all who cope with a non NT child.
I honestly don't think I could do it, I really don't.

[MoMandaS]

Yes huggybear, I was one of them for years. Then was lucky enough to get my dream. He happens to have additional needs and there are times when I feel exactly like the OP. Surely you can't be as ignorant as your post suggests?

[Squidgee]

neurotypical, the 'average' person who's brain is wired the 'normal' way.
as opposed to
neurodiverse - people on the autism spectrum.

its much broader than that, but that's the quick reply.

[Havaina]

I've one NT, he's a dream

Possibly not the sort of support OP was looking for. Unless you mean your others aren't NT?

[AllAboutTheStuff]

I’m another one that is unreasonable too then op. It’s so hard and heartbreaking at times too

[twinkletoedelephant]

Yep me too. All 3 DC have ASD, I allow myself a mope every now and again that I will never know what it like to parent a neuro typical child. All the lovely easy spur of the moment days out trips away and spontaneous fun that is so far out of the realms of my day to day life, it can be heartbreaking.
But I pull myself together, we only get one go at life - so we will make the best if what we do have and besides NO ONE gives better ninja hugs than my dc

[Squidgee]

Crochet, my DS just started at a specialist school for children on the spectrum.. for the first time in his education, I can do that... its honestly the best thing ever.

I still have my phone glued to my hand and jump every time it rings though... I have phone trauma from his primary school calling me!!