About sleeping arrangements on family holiday?

[PurpleMac]

Will try to keep this simple!

Large holiday home booked for a week. three double bedrooms, one twin bedroom, one travel cot.

Originally there would have been one childless couple, then two couples who each have an 8yo and 2yo. Plan was for the 8yos to share a room, then we would bring an extra travel cot so the 2yos each have one and sleep in their parents rooms.

However one of the couple's has now split up, meaning the 8yo stepchild is also not coming.

So we have three doubles:

1. couple with no children
   
2. DH and I
   
3. single adult (let's call him Alex)
   
   There's also a twin bedroom that our DS(8) will sleep in.
   
   There's now some conflict over where both of the 2yos will sleep. Both have had a growth spurt in recent weeks and are too long to fit comfortably in travelcots. The other 2yo is bigger and older than our 2yo and has started sleeping in a bed at home, our 2yo is still in his cot but we are taking the side down this week. Holiday is in a month.
   
   Both Alex and the other couple think that Alex's son should share the twin room with our DS(8) and we put DS(2) in with us in a Travel cot he won't be comfortable in. DH and I think our DS(2) should share the twin with DS(8), whilst the other 2yo can sleep in the double bed with his dad for the week.
   
   There are two reasons for this:
   Firstly, DS(2) won't be comfortable in the Travel cot and will end up coming in with DH and I anyway, meaning three of us in a double bed whilst Alex gets a double to himself every night.
   Secondly, Alex's 2yo son is a bad sleeper. Wakes up at 5am every morning, and absolutely adores our DS(8) so if they are sharing a room together he will absolutely wake our DS up every morning wanting to play. He's a young 2 and won't really understand/remember if he is told the night before not to do this. Both of our DSs sleep through til 7 so wouldn't be an issue if they share, and if our younger DS did wake up early I would hear him and go get him- I'm not confident Alex would do this with his son and not sure DS(8) would be comfortable enough going to wake Alex up to let him know his son is awake.
   
   Totally willing to hear IABU or precious if that is the case, it just doesn't seem fair to me.

[underneaththeash]

Just swap part of the way through the week, that way both parties get what they want.

[IggyAce]

Your plan makes sense, I would offer to pay a little more since your family is using 2 rooms.

[FraterculaArctica]

YANBU. I have a (young ) 2 yo who's not a bad sleeper but no way would I try and put her in with an unrelated child, that just asks for nighttime antics. Adult plus 2 yo in double bed is plenty of room - I often have DH and DD in bed with me!

[Xenia]

I think your suggestion is better - you have two children so they get to share a room and are good sleepers. The 5am waker 2 year old demon child goes in with his father as no one else will want to be up at 5am so it's the father's job to deal with it (and it's not as if he will be having holiday sex the child will interrupt and it means the 2 couples have a private room each without children.

[CactusFred]

Your plan is the best.

However poor old Alex will be up early every morning, maybe other adults could take an early turn to give him a couple of hours lie in?

[Wildboar]

Your plan sounds best. Why should he get. Bed to himself? Also makes sense for your children to share. You could offer your children to share a double bed and he can have the twin room with his two year old if bed sharing is a problem for him.

[JellySlice]

Of course Alex's ds sleeps with him and the siblings sleep together. As soon as you described the situation that was the obvious solution to me.

[LooksBetterWithAFilter]

It makes more sense for siblings to share than your child and another child of the same age. There are times when I’ve had to share a bed with one of my dc to make the numbers fit because I have three. It seems bonkers to put two unrelated children together and Alex get a whole bed to himself when two siblings could share and there is an empty space in Alex’s room that his son could sleep in.

[Returnofthesmileybar]

Plans stay as they were originally so your 8 year old gets a room to him self. The couple splitting doesn't mean any couple get to say whoop whoop free bed and make an eight year responsible for a two year old. It's a few nights and I guarantee if the couple hadn't split the travel cots would have been fine. If the mattress off the single needs to be moved to Alex's room for his 2 year old then let him, assuming he is paying the original amount

[Holidayshopping]

Yup-your plan is the most sensible but you should then pay half of the accommodation costs as you have half of the bedrooms.

It’s concerning that both Alex and the couple have come to a decision you don’t agree with though-that doesn’t bode well for amicable arrangements on the holiday.

[CallingDannyBoy]

Alex wants your son as a babysitter so he can get a lie in.

[Skyejuly]

Can you bed share for a week? That's what we do x

[PurpleMac]

The couple splitting doesn't mean any couple get to say whoop whoop free bed and make an eight year responsible for a two year old

The other couple have paid for the entire accommodation (we and Alex have offered to contribute but they won't have it). If Alex hadn't split with his partner, we would have booked into a B&B sintead. We have just gone away for a weekend and DS(2) absolutely does not fit inbtue travelcot. He's about 5cm longer than the cot is. It's not a few days, it's a week, and that's far too long to expect a small child to be uncomfortable in a bed that is too small for him. It would be like sticking the 8yo in a toddler bed.

Am so an 8yo sharing with a 2yo isn't "making him responsible for a 2yo" at all. It is siblings sharing a room which is very normal for a lot of families.

[UnderMajorDomoMinor]

I would emphasize the waking your DS issue. That’s the main thing. It would be very unfair for ds to be kept awake/woken in the night/woken early.

If Alex doesn’t want to share bed he could buy blow up bed for his son for floor in his room.

[BabySharkAteMyHamster]

Id take air beds for the 2 year olds. There's loads of cheap ones in the shops at the mo.

[PurpleMac]

Alex wants your son as a babysitter so he can get a lie in.

Alex is an early riser anyway and doesn't do lie ins, so I don't think this is the case. He just doesn't want to bedshare with his son for a week (which I don't blame him, bedsharing with toddlers isn't fun for anyone!) But what it comes down to is either Alex bedsharing with a 2yo, or DH and I bedsharing with a 2yo, which is even less comfortable.

[UnderMajorDomoMinor]

Think pp meant Alex was making Ds responsible for his child.

[MiniCooperLover]

If Alex doesn't want to bedshare with his own child for a week he needs to bring a blow up single mattress and his child can sleep on that in his own room.

[TulipsInBloom1]

Yy to your two sharing.

However if it gets to the point where you agree for an easy life, on the first morning there just say "ds8 had a rough night so we are bringing the mattress into our room". Top and tail your two in your room. Alex can then deal with his 2yo however he sees fit.

[TulipsInBloom1]

If Alex doesnt like bedsharing then he and his 2yo can have the twin.

[Jengnr]

What about readybeds for the 2 year olds?

[CallingDannyBoy]

Probably judging Alex by my standards then

Think your solution is best and Alex could bring a blow up bed or camping mats. We put our kids on camping mats when we are away as they wobble less than blow up beds. Mind you one of my kids often gets up and sleeps on a pile of sleeping bags and duvets instead of his bed at times. I come into his room and find him fast asleep on the floor.

[FinallyHere]

He just doesn't want to bedshare with his son for a week

Could Alex and his two year old share the twin room and your DC share the double?

[twoundertwo54321]

Buy a ready bed and put your two year old on floor in room with kids. It will all change through the week anyway I'm sure as important thing is all the kids sleep well

[househunthappening]

Definitely your plan, makes perfect sense. There are 6 beds and 6 people, so why should there be 1 bed space left free whilst someone sleeps somewhere unsuitable.

That would be like me and my DH booking a double room in a hotel and me making him sleep in the bath while I starfish in the bed alone.

Another suggestion - Alex and his child share the twin room and your children share the other double? No idea why that is any different/better, or why you should make allowances for Alex, but just an idea. I suspect Alex's child would climb into his bed anyway, double or single, but if he says no then you know it's just him wanting to sprawl out in the double and leave someone else to deal with his 2 year old!