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AIBU?

To feel slightly embarrassed to say which university my daughter is at?

327 replies

sheepdontfly · 17/09/2018 16:00

Can no one start shouting horrible things to me please? I'm wondering if anyone else knows what I mean and can tell me that they have felt the same or similar.

My daughter has started university this September and so have lots of my friends children. Also her older sibling went to one of the best unis for their subject and a lot of my friends know this, so they automatically are interested in my daughters university. I mentioned it to the first friend and their response was "oh, isn't that really far down in the boards, why did she pick there?" And I was a bit surprised at someone replying that and since I haven't really wanted to tell people where she goes.

I did say to another friend and although she didn't say the same, she did say "well yes quite hard to get into good unis nowadays" and now I'm extremely conscious of it.

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HollowTalk · 17/09/2018 16:01

Did your daughter choose that university for good reasons?

What were her A level results?

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Aprilshowersnowastorm · 17/09/2018 16:01

Maybe find some less judgmental (snobby?) friends?

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Tunnocks34 · 17/09/2018 16:02

Your friends sound like dick heads.

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sheepdontfly · 17/09/2018 16:02

Her A-Levels were BCC so she didn't have lots and lots of options.

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NataliaOsipova · 17/09/2018 16:02

They don’t sound very nice friends!

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Fairgroundtoast · 17/09/2018 16:03

What horrible things to say. I agree with PP. Find nicer friends!

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Armadillostoes · 17/09/2018 16:04

Hi OP-These people are tiresome and insecure. Many non-Russell Group universities are excellent in lots of respects and many excel in particular courses. Don't let comments from the snobbish and ill-informed bother you.

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donajimena · 17/09/2018 16:05

You need better friends. And to stop giving such a shit. My university is former poly in the same area as a RG university and I have seen people pause when I explain I'm at the non RG. But, my course is so good that it has a 95 % rate of people going into managerial positions within 6 months of graduating.

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Nesssie · 17/09/2018 16:08

I went to a 'far down the board' uni that was in the same city as a very prestigious university.
I loved it. So much fun, learnt so much, none of the pressure.

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RangeRider · 17/09/2018 16:08

You need new friends! Different universities have different specialities and people also decide according to preferred location in terms of distance to home, friends, accessibility, facilities, cost of living etc. A student who loves climbing, for instance, isn't likely to pick Cambridge as their 1st choice because it's flat & miles away from anything (unless they plan to free-climb the university buildings!)

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Smokeyrobinson · 17/09/2018 16:09

You need to find some less judgemental friends OP.

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happymummy12345 · 17/09/2018 16:11

How rude of them. It's fantastic she's at the place she wanted to be. That's all that matters

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RelentlessSylvia · 17/09/2018 16:11

My children will never pass exams or live independently. Celebrate your daughter for what she has accomplished and stop hanging out with arseholes.

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MustBeDueSomeBetterFeet · 17/09/2018 16:12

Are these people who don't really know your daughter? Different settings suit different people and surely that was a large part of her choice too.

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SuburbanRhonda · 17/09/2018 16:12

It seems like you think the same as your friends, OP. Otherwise you’d brush off their comments for the bullshit they are and certainly wouldn’t be posting on here about it.

Make sure your feelings don’t transfer to your DD. Poor girl.

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PawPawNoodle · 17/09/2018 16:12

The only university I recall people being very snobbish about is Middlesex and our varsity rival but that was sports-related

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DarlingNikita · 17/09/2018 16:14

I think your 'friends' are arseholes.

'How rude' and a hard stare.

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Pumpkinpie2018 · 17/09/2018 16:15

I’m sure if your daughter read this she would be pretty upset. Ignore your horrible friends.

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ADarkandStormyKnight · 17/09/2018 16:15

Congrats to your daughter for starting University. I hope she has a great time.

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sheepdontfly · 17/09/2018 16:16

I never felt this way before my friends and their response. I just hope she does well.

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MatildaTheCat · 17/09/2018 16:16

What horrid comments. Just say that it was that particular course she really liked. Any persistence would be met with a very hard stare.

Hopefully there are some good points about the uni and course?

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ashtrayheart · 17/09/2018 16:16

My two eldest have SN and I was ecstatic when my 21 year old scraped a GCSE pass in one subject recently!

I would also be fucking ecstatic if either of my other 2 children ended up at Uni, whichever one it is !

I know it's all relative, but please be proud of your children's achievements.

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Asterado · 17/09/2018 16:16

You definitely have a friend problem. I hope your DD doesn’t pick up that you’re embarrassed...

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ashtrayheart · 17/09/2018 16:17

Ps. I am shouting at your 'friends' not you.

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Disfordarkchocolate · 17/09/2018 16:18

What's wrong with BCC, plenty of options with those grades. Is it a course she will do well on and can lead to a good range of opportunities? That's all that counts. I went to an RG university and it's not really helped me.

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