Namechanged.
6 months ago I started seeing the most amazing man and we have fallen for each other in a big way. The sex is astonishing: gentle and affectionate and erotic and everything else I could hope for. So far, so bloody fantastic.
Except he is gay.
He denies it to the hilt.
But the things he tells me lead me to one conclusion, that he is gay.
AIBU to think he is gay based on the fact that when he was doing A levels, he got a detention along with another boy and whilst bored and stuck in a secluded classroom for a few hours, they ended up having sex. He says this was just a "you show me yours / I will show you mine" scenario that went further. But he admits that he lost his virginity to this other boy.
Later, still as a young man he had sex on holiday with an older man, a family friend. He says they never referred to it afterwards and it was just one of those weird youthful things.
I think there was a third liaison with a man. Not sure of the exact details.
He no longer watches porn (deal-breaker for me, and we have discussed this very frankly) but he says in his twenties he would watch porn and the porn he liked was not m/f, but men on their own wanking. He says he never wanted to watch men together but a man on his own was a turn on.
He absolutely denies that he is gay. He has three children with his ex-wife. And we have the most amazing sex life.
But he is gay, right? Or bisexual. He won't have either. He is honest about his past sex with men. He says he is not attracted to men, but that this was all opportunistic experimentation.
I am not trying to pigeon-hole him. But I can't think this relationship will go the distance if he is in denial about his sexuality.
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AIBU?
...to think my boyfriend is actually gay?
78 replies
WhipWhipCrackAway · 12/09/2018 21:55
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