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To ask friend to remove photos of my DC fe her FB feed?

(82 Posts)
TodoDoingDone Tue 14-Aug-18 08:44:56

We have no recognisable photos of our DC on social media. My visiting friend has just posted some where they are recongisable and I'm tagged. DC aren't tagged, no names mentioned . She didn't ask our opinion/permission...

Aibu to ask her to remove those where DC can be recognized?

OP’s posts: |
caseoftheexfiles Tue 14-Aug-18 08:46:26

Are your children in a group or is it just them?

Heismyopendoor Tue 14-Aug-18 08:48:10

YANBU just ask her to take them down

converseandjeans Tue 14-Aug-18 08:48:48

YANBU. I only tend to put pics on FB of other kids if their parents do too.

IcanMooCanYou Tue 14-Aug-18 08:49:19

How old are your children?

InDubiousBattle Tue 14-Aug-18 08:50:11

YANBU, I would ask for them to be taken down in your position too.

Hangingaroundtheportal Tue 14-Aug-18 08:50:37

Does she have a public profile or is it set to private/friends only?

Yes, you are perfectly within your rights to ask her to remove them, and she probably should have asked you, especially if she can see that you never put pics of your kids online (I have a couple of friends the same and I just know not to put any pics of their kids on FB).

But, tbh, if she has a private FB page and it's only going to be her friends and your friends seeing these images then I don't really understand the problem with your children being 'recognised' (unless there are child protection issues?) Do you worry about your children being 'recognised' in the street?

But no YANBU to ask her to remove them.

TodoDoingDone Tue 14-Aug-18 08:50:54

In a group of 5, or in a pair.

OP’s posts: |
PotteringAlong Tue 14-Aug-18 08:52:34

Just ask her. I accidentally posted a picture in a group of a friend’s child, completely forgetting that she doesn’t put pictures up. She asked me to take it down. I apologised profusely and did immediately. Not a drama.

Love51 Tue 14-Aug-18 08:52:58

YANBU. Ask politely and don't give a lengthy explanation. You say she's a friend so she might be embarrassed to have upset you so keep it light (like, would you mind closing the door, tone of voice, rather than OMG you put me child at risk, how could you be so selfish and heartless). Although given you are asking, I'm sure you would be kind!

TodoDoingDone Tue 14-Aug-18 08:53:11

We were talking about FB and she said that she should probably removeots of people as she doesn't know who they are... The DC are pre-teens.

Yes, I think I would ask first

OP’s posts: |
Shitonthebloodything Tue 14-Aug-18 08:55:14

I think a lot of people just don't realise it might be an issue. I'd just call them and explain very much that you prefer your children not to have any pictures online. She'll probably delete straight away and be embarrassed for not thinking of it.

TodoDoingDone Tue 14-Aug-18 08:55:40

Thanks! I'll keep it light. I'm not hugely offended but just rather she didn't. But she's so much more relaxed than I am about things, that I just wanted to check i6 wasn't being psycho uptight! wink

OP’s posts: |
Mulberry72 Tue 14-Aug-18 08:56:51

Just ask her to take it down, my BF doesn’t have photos of her DC online at all (work/CP related) and I posted an Xmas party photo where her DC we’re just visible in the background which she asked me to remove, which I did, no biggie.

TheLadyArmitage Tue 14-Aug-18 08:58:16

Of course yanbu, I always ask the parents before posting any photos of kids (wish people would pay me the same courtesy!)

Suewiang Tue 14-Aug-18 09:12:37

It’s too late already if taken down it only removes from new people seeing.
Anyone that has already seen and shared it it dosent remove it from them

chocolateworshipper Tue 14-Aug-18 09:18:37

You can ask FB to remove if the child is under 13, but it's better to ask the friend direct

summerFruitPudding Tue 14-Aug-18 09:21:49

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BrightonBB Tue 14-Aug-18 09:22:19

It is useful to have your FB settings set so that you have to approve any tags.

zen1 Tue 14-Aug-18 09:30:27

YANBU. I am not on FB or anything but someone I know put a video with my DC clearly recognisable on YouTube. I asked him to remove it and he did.

Enidblyton1 Tue 14-Aug-18 09:31:16

Can you just remove your tagged name? I remember years ago tagging someone in a photo and it was gone a while later, so assumed she must have de-tagged herself.

TodoDoingDone Tue 14-Aug-18 09:49:29

I didn't know that about having to approve tags. Thanks for the tip.
* summer*-you have no idea why I may not want them on social media. hmm

OP’s posts: |
NadiaLeon Tue 14-Aug-18 09:54:16

Todo - what is the reason you don't want them on social media?

summerFruitPudding Tue 14-Aug-18 09:54:56

I can have a guess...

DrunkUnicorn Tue 14-Aug-18 09:57:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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