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AIBU?

For reporting cousin for prostituting herself. Has two kids...

150 replies

cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:18

I'm in need of some advice about my distant cousin who is prostituting herself online with her two young children in the house.
I found some accounts belonging to her on twitter and Instagram that contained explicit photos and videos of her, (these accounts are public for everyone to see).
She posts private videos too on a website that you can subscribe to for £10 a month.
She is also inviting strangers over to have sex with, I can only assume this is happening in her house and not in a hotel.

My concern here is for the children and their welfare at home, I worry for her safety too, these men know her address and could become dangerous.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:20

TITLE SHOULD SAY COUSIN! Whoops!

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ProfessorMoody · 10/08/2018 12:20

How do you know she's having people over for sex? Lots of people cam.

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mavydoes · 10/08/2018 12:21

Police if children at risk but your gonna need evidence so screenshots etc.

Also - are you sure she isn't a victim of revenge porn??

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Stirner · 10/08/2018 12:21

@cousinconfusion - no, not unreasonable, half of mumsnet will be along shortly to tell you that you are though!

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strawberryHaribo · 10/08/2018 12:21

I'd at least speak to her first regarding your concerns

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avocadoincident · 10/08/2018 12:22

I would feel a responsibility towards the welfare of the children and I would (reluctantly) ring social services. If anything happens to the children and you haven't spoken out how will you live yourself?

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cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:23

@strawberryHaribo
I wish I could, but we're not close at all. I haven't spoken to her for years and years.

@ProfessorMoody
Other family members have told me she is having men over for sex.

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cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:24

@avocadoincident
I know that I can't leave it without doing something. I'm just unsure as to how I can go about this appropriately...

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RachelAnneJ · 10/08/2018 12:25

You only know what you have seen and are making up the rest. If she is invirinf people over, she may arrange for a friend to look after her children.

I think it is unreasonable to report without speaking to her first.

She may do it because she enjoys it or she could be up shut crek and is desperate to provide for her children.

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RachelAnneJ · 10/08/2018 12:26

If you've not spoken to her for years and aren't close then I would myob.

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nicebitofquiche · 10/08/2018 12:28

If you are worried about the children contact children's services for advice. You can do it anonymously

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cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:31

@RachelAnneJ
I know she lives quite an isolated life and sadly doesn't have any friends that would help out.
She has a partner who is fully aware of what she is doing, he is unable to leave as their relationship is very complex and he does not want to leave her with the children.

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SomeKnobend · 10/08/2018 12:33

What makes you think the children would be in the house while she's having men over? And you say you don't even know if men are coming to the house or if they're going elsewhere? You seem to be going massively out of your way to stalk a cousin you haven't seen for years and then assuming the worst (and pretty unlikely) scenario possible. Why? Has she endangered the children in the past? Do report if you're concerned, obviously, but I'm not convinced your concerns are reasonably justified.

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Awwlookatmybabyspider · 10/08/2018 12:35

Well the poor women must be desparate to be doing that. Instead of running clactailing to the powers that be, why not do what families are meant to do find out what has led her onto this path and help try to help her.

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PinkDaffodil2 · 10/08/2018 12:36

If the partner knows what is going on then surely he’ll be taking care of the children when / if she has men over, mitigating the risk?

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cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:40

@SomeKnobend
Most of the information I have has come from my other cousins and relatives who are in contact with her.
I'm not here to judge her and cause a shit storm.
Her children have always been at risk whilst living with her. They used to rummage through the kitchen bin for food in the morning as she wouldn't wake up to give them breakfast.
Her children are not being cared for by anyone else but her, so I know they are always in the house when she's filming these videos.

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MarklesMerkin · 10/08/2018 12:42

Lots of women near where I live meet up with random guys on Tinder ... possibly whilst their kids are in bed. Shall I ring SS or does it only matter when they're being paid for it? I'm not saying it's an ideal situation but unless you're reporting every single woman you know that has had a stranger in her home then why are you singling out your cousin? Seems odd to me. You say you're close at all, have you had a falling out at some point? I can't help but feel this comes from a place of vindictiveness rather than genuine concern - I could be wrong of course.

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cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:42

@PinkDaffodil2
That's possible, but doesn't make it any less dangerous.
I would still be concerned for the children.

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SomeKnobend · 10/08/2018 12:42

Hang on - you just said she had a partner, so how can any of the rest of that be true? Or is he an abuser as well?

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cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:43

@SomeKnobend
Her partner knows exactly what is happened.
Previously in the thread I explained why he is unable to leave her.

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cousinconfusion · 10/08/2018 12:45

@MarklesMerkin
Meeting up with someone on tinder is entirely different to having sex with strangers for money during the day with your kids possibly in the house.

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Veterinari · 10/08/2018 12:45

I’n Not sure what’s vindictive about it. It sounds chaotic and the children are neglected. I assume they’re already on SS radar? I’m not sure why raising additional concerns would be unreasonable

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haverhill · 10/08/2018 12:46

If she has form for neglect already, I would definitely contact social services. Despite what lots of people will claim on here, this is no environment for kids to be in.

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YeTalkShiteHen · 10/08/2018 12:48

Meeting up with someone on tinder is entirely different to having sex with strangers for money during the day with your kids possibly in the house

Not if you bring them home. The risk is exactly the same to the children.

That said OP, none of what you say you know is actual fact. It’s gossip and hearsay, so I’d keep out. Let the people who know the actual facts report if necessary.

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DearMrDilkington · 10/08/2018 12:48

Are you 100% sure her partner isn't the one "pimping" her out? It seems more likely than him being stuck there for the children.

Why wouldn't he leave with them? Or kick her out to keep their children safe?

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