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Naked MIL

(387 Posts)
Wrongintherightway Sun 29-Jul-18 23:51:22

MIL had ds1 & ds2 for a few hours recently to help out with childcare in school holidays (not a regular arrangement). Ds1 came home and said gran was walking round naked! It turns out she had gone for a mid morning shower and was walking about naked (indoors obvs)

AIBU to think this is not acceptable, ds1 is 12 and ds2 is 7?

IceCreamFace Mon 30-Jul-18 00:11:57

Bit weird with the older child, fine with the 7 year old around but hardly going to give him PTSD - probably just embarrass him surely?

coolncalm Mon 30-Jul-18 00:20:42

Shocked at people that think it's reasonable. It's massively inappropriate to walk round naked in front of your 12 year old grandson.Why the hell should they have to see that. Makes you wonder why she'd do it.

Powerless Mon 30-Jul-18 00:23:55

You'd all have something very different if the children were female and the grandparent male! Dick on show!

Powerless Mon 30-Jul-18 00:24:05

*to say

skunkatanka Mon 30-Jul-18 00:27:03

Bloody weird OP. Really embarrassing for the kids too.

Magicpaintbrush Mon 30-Jul-18 00:29:11

Powerless - exactly! If grandpa was walking around with his cock out in front of his twelve year old grand daughter that would be different would it?

Totally inappropriate and unnecessary. The boys must have felt so embarrassed. Nobody wants to see naked grandma (except grandpa). Honestly.

locochat Mon 30-Jul-18 00:29:44

Perfectly normal under my bridge OP

Sabina21 Mon 30-Jul-18 06:35:52

I think the kids had an "eew" moment..I wish my MIL had helped me with back up childcare. Maybe give a
clothes voucher to her as a thank you gift.

TheShapeOfEwe Mon 30-Jul-18 06:47:22

Some people are just very relaxed about nudity but I agree in this context it's not appropriate

Kpo58 Mon 30-Jul-18 06:52:05

It's very different thing seeing your grandmother who you very rarely see naked to seeing your parents walking around naked.

kaytee87 Mon 30-Jul-18 07:07:39

It is a bit strange, any 12yo I know would have been embarrassed. If she only had them for a few hours I find it strange that she went for a shower at all tbh, why not before they arrive or after they leave?

OliviaStabler Mon 30-Jul-18 07:19:56

Highly inappropriate.

BertrandRussell Mon 30-Jul-18 07:25:37

“Wandering around” could have just meant nipping from bathroom to bedroom not thinking they would see her, or it could mean actually wandering around making cups of tea. One is acceptable, the other, obviously, isn’t, because hugely embarrassing for the boys.

“Mil- we’ve stopped being naked in front of the boys because they’ve started being embarrassed- it’s their age! Could you remember to put a dressing gown on too, please?”

AnnieAnoniMoose Mon 30-Jul-18 07:26:30

I grew up in a household where seeing my parents naked was normal, ditto with grandparents, my aunts, uncles & cousins when staying with them. We are a perfectly average english family, not even Scandi 😂

It’s a little unusual that she felt that comfortable given she doesn’t spend that much time with them, but if that’s how she was when DH was growing up, then I can see why she didn’t give it a second thought.

I think it GOOD for children to see bodies of all kinds of shapes, sizes and ages, it’s far better for them than only ever seeing airbrushed models. I grew up knowing that whilst we all have much the same bits and bobs, there’s a wide range of ‘normal’.

Slartybartfast Mon 30-Jul-18 07:26:57

Embarrassing for DS blush
but what would you do? Nothing.
i would hope you would have a good relationship with her to let it go

Mammalamb Mon 30-Jul-18 07:29:27

Yanbu. That would make me very uncomfortable too. Can you imagine the comments if it was a FIL and a 12 year old girl?

Mummyoflittledragon Mon 30-Jul-18 07:29:51

Unless you, your children and your dh go around nude all the time, of course they’re going to be embarrassed and most of the population don’t do this so your ds’s reaction could have been anticipated. Very inappropriate, especially at 12! Personally I would have a word with your mil. Tough if she’s embarrassed or makes it out it to be a mistake. Your only goal is that she doesn’t do this again.

Did she used to walk around in the buff when your dh was this age?

Lethaldrizzle Mon 30-Jul-18 07:30:16

Bodies don't have to be naked to see there are all different shapes and sizes! Cant say I ever saw my gran in the buff.

Jeippinghmip Mon 30-Jul-18 07:30:30

Some people are more relaxed about this sort of thing and I guess your MIL is just behaving like she usually does in her own house. I think making a fuss about it is weird, quite honestly.

rushhourtraffic Mon 30-Jul-18 07:33:41

It's inappropriate obviously.

Why anyone think otherwise is beyond me. The dc are not toddlers anymore!

HoppingPavlova Mon 30-Jul-18 07:34:52

I think this is really interesting.

In our house it would not be weird for myself, DH it my mother. But the in-laws, yep weird so it’s obviously an in law bias thing for us.

DH and I both do the nudie walk from main bathroom to bedroom, opposite ends of the house, I generally get distracted along the way, duck into kitchen and put kettle on, whack some toast in etc so it’s ready for when I’m dressed. If kids (teens/young adult) don’t like it they can shut their eyes. My complete don’t give a shit factor is also exacerbated by the fact that the kids do it as well but have a more direct nudie run from bath to bedroom than I do.

My mother visits rarely due to distance but if hubby is not home she does the undue run as well, doesn’t care if grandkids see. The kids have never mentioned they think it’s odd. However I guarantee if I’m-laws came and did it we would all be wtf.

BinkyandBunty Mon 30-Jul-18 07:37:05

My 12yo son would be mortified. I find it hard to believe that your MIL didn't at least consider that most 12yos would be.

strawberrisc Mon 30-Jul-18 07:47:16

Some people grow up in “naked houses” some don’t.

You are definitely NBU. My daughter would be mortified.

WilburIsSomePig Mon 30-Jul-18 07:47:42

I can’t believe the first few posters think it is!

They very probably don't @Beingthere, but like everyone to think they're the cool kids.

We're not a 'cover up' kind of family in the sense that we wander from bathroom to bedroom to get dressed, but that is within the confines of our own home and in front each other - not extended family. I don't fancy my uncle wandering about with his meat and two veg on show in front of my DCs when he stays, and I wouldn't expect my PILs to do this either.

If it embarrasses your children, it's not fair to them and no, it's not acceptable.

BertrandRussell Mon 30-Jul-18 07:48:42

“ I find it hard to believe that your MIL didn't at least consider that most 12yos would be.”

It depends on whether she thought she’d be seen or not.

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