Yes I was and I need a kick up the arse and a hug :(

[itsbritneybiatch]

Long story short.

child's father is an unreliable, selfish prick.

After two months of no contact with her, he is now back on the scene. I want to stop contact completely and before anyone fucking flames me I have my reasons and they are not about me. Happy to go into them, it's not a drip feed but it would take a long time to type on my phone.

My DP is amazing. Properly amazing. The most kind hearted man in the world. And he takes no shit. At all.

I lost my shit last night and got super drunk. Took everything out on him. Everything just felt too much, we are rowing over my ex. My parents are taking it out on each other (over my ex) and had a row this weekend. My partner is short with his son my DSS. They had a row. Tempers are all frayed because of my ex now wanting contact again.

I've rowed with my best friend this morning also.

It would be wrong to stop our child seeing her dad. I know this and I never would stop them having a relationship.

However when he fiddles his fucking self employed wages to avoid paying what he should, let's her down, takes no responsibility for letting her down, speaks to me like shit, has no respect for me as her mother, ffs.

I needed a rant. I am crying for being horrible to my partner, upset I've upset him, upset my parents are snapping at each other, upset I got so drunk last night, furious with my ex for being such a fucking waste of space cunt.

I need a hug and a cry and I need to stop letting that prick affect our lives.

I just need a day to fucking cry and rage.

[itsbritneybiatch]

Today I am sick of being the better person in all this.

I want to make it up with my partner. I've apologised but tbh I can't remember anything and I don't know what I'm apologising for. I feel beyond shitty and horrible. I feel sorry for him, myself.

[Singlenotsingle]

So how can we help, OP? Depends how old DC is, and whether she has a relationship with her dad.

[SantaClauseMightWork]

I broke a bit of my living room wall few days ago. Was really upset on something that got out of control. All of us have times like that.
Apologise with firm words and unconditionally. Ask what you can do to say sorry and make it better. Don't use more than two sentences to your friend and your partner. Then let them decide. Hope it gets better.

[itsbritneybiatch]

Daughter is five.

He emigrated at the beginning of the year. Didn't tell us till he was at the gate in the airport. Didn't say goodbye to her. Left me with a full mortgage to pay on a house we had that he was living in.

She doesn't ask for him unless she sees him.

He has seen her five times since the year began. His choice. I've never withheld access.

[AjasLipstick]

I know people say that children should never be stopped from seeing a parent but from what you've said here, I think he's lost any rights.

Fuck him! He's upsetting you and your loved ones.

Let DD slowly forget him. When she's old enough, tell her the truth....that he messed you all up too much.

[Doyoumind]

You need to take control of the situation. If he wants contact make sure a long term schedule is agreed. If he doesn't stick to it that's his issue. No alterations to the agreed schedule should be allowed without very good reason and plenty of notice.

What's he expecting now in terms of contact?

[AWomanIsAnAdultHumanFemale]

Ok you need to to totally disengage from your ex. If he contacts you to arrange seeing DD, don’t respond. No matter how many times he calls or texts. Ignore ignore ignore. Let him get a solicitor and go to court if he wants to see her. Let him put some actual fucking committed effort into it. Let him prove he actually wants regular, consistent contact. Until you have a court order in your hand, ignore him completely.