Sorry this may be long but I don't want to drip feed. I have NCd.
I have been married about 12 years, together for nearly 20. we have one DD aged 10. Me and DH both work full time and went to university. We own our own home in a estate with other mortgaged houses. We come from backgrounds where our parents both worked, also went to university, grew up in nice estates...you get the idea.
BIL is 3 years younger. Has been with his fiance for 16 years. She comes from a family where the background is drug dealing/using, prison sentences, knife crime, truancy from school, benefit fraud, unemployment or cash in hand, dangerous dog convictions, smoking cannabis etc. Fiance is nice although she has been done for benefit fraud and currently works part time cash in hand. Fiance left school with no qualifications. BIL did a mechanics apprenticeship after leaving school at 16. They live in a council house in a council estate. They had their first DD at 19, she is now 16.
Their DD has been causing them a lot of trouble of late - playing truant, getting drunk, staying out all weekend with no contact with parents, no idea where she is, swearing at her parents.
When discussing it, her mum just says "that's what teenagers are like" and "you've got all this to come"
So...AIBU to think "actually no, I don't have all this to come and no, that isn't what all teenagers are like". AIBU to think their circumstances have a lot to do with it and I would handle it a lot differently (eg not taking a seemingly 'oh it's normal' attitude?)
Even my DH is making excuses for his brother, saying his DNiece used to be a lovely little girl, just like our DD is now. DNiece was, and still is, a moody ungrateful spoiled brat. I know that sounds horrible but it is. She's mean to our DD, gets £2000 spent on her at xmas and moans to my face if I don't buy her the right brand of present.
Do I really "have all this to come"?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
to think I don't have all this to come with my DD?
250 replies
colalight · 20/07/2018 12:37
OP posts:
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