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AIBU?

To find sharing school reports on social media crass...

85 replies

Grammarist · 15/07/2018 18:54

Exactly as the title says, really.

I just don't get it.

A school report really isn't something for parents to take photos of and splash all over Facebook, or wherever. I find it pretty cringeworthy to see all these posts where parents are after reflected glory because of something that belongs to their child.

Or the flip side where parents are going off on one about something a teacher has written in confidence to them, and putting it all over social media.

Plus - I find it very intrusive and feel that the children may not want that information shared.

Anyone else find this awful?

OP posts:
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notyourmummy · 15/07/2018 19:01

You're NBU - it's just another example of parental one-upmanship. If you're so desperate to show your friends/family your child's report, email it to them. That said, my mother emailed me my niece's and nephew's reports, unsolicited, and, quite frankly I wasn't that interested!!

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Grammarist · 15/07/2018 19:15

I think it's going to come back and bite some parents on the arse when the children realise just how much of their private information has been shared.

I discuss reports with my children in private. It's not for anyone else or anyone else's business.

OP posts:
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MrsKiplin · 15/07/2018 19:17

I think there's just no notion of privacy any more and that's scary.

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lljkk · 15/07/2018 19:41

DS got socially shunned in primary school, considered a horrible thug. Angry parents stopped us street to moan about DS, folk looked at me like dirt on shoe if I asked about invite to playdate. Not invited to parties: "I only invited you because I invited everyone else and my mum said I had to invite you too." DD's social life affected just b/c she was DS's sibling.

DS's secondary school reports are full of comments about how polite and mature he is. I'm not gonna feel bad about posting them on FBk.

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LipstickHandbagCoffee · 15/07/2018 19:43

Generally,no not a fan it’s usually Braggy, end of term equivalent of Xmas round robin

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elQuintoConyo · 15/07/2018 19:45

If you don't like it, don't do it yourself.

Only my dsis posts stuff like this and it is out of pride, not oneupmanship in her case.

DS has just learnt to swim - should i post that or would that piss on everybody's chips?

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chickenowner · 15/07/2018 19:46

As a teacher I would not be happy if what I'd written was shared on social media, particularly if my signature was visible.

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AlonsosLeftPinky · 15/07/2018 19:47

I agree, it's completely unnecessary.

By and large, nobody cares about your child's school report.

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Notsurprisedatall · 15/07/2018 19:48

Yeah I think it not fair on the children or the teachers.

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haverhill · 15/07/2018 19:49

No, it’s cringey.

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helterskelter3 · 15/07/2018 19:51

Teacher here, I would also be very unhappy about what I’d written being shared on social media.

I think you have to be 100% sure that your child would be happy, as an adult, to have so much information about themselves out there in the ether. I doubt you can be that sure...

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Utrecht · 15/07/2018 19:55

I have teacher friends who post pictures of cards and thank you notes from students. Obviously that kind of note is lovely to receive, but publishing them online has always seemed grotesque to me - boastful, self-absorbed and a massive intrusion into the child's privacy. Same goes for my own kids' reports - I'm proud of them but that's about my child, not a source of reflected glory or gratification for me.

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PattiStanger · 15/07/2018 20:06

I once sent a thank you card to a volunteer who organised an activity my DC went to and I was not happy to see it later posted on facebook.

If I was a teacher I would also object to reports being shared online


YANBU

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GreatDuckCookery6211 · 15/07/2018 20:14

I've seen a few recently. Ridiculous bout of bragging. " Super proud of Alice and Matilda's fabulous reports, my girls are sooo clever! " type of thing. Cringe.

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listsandbudgets · 15/07/2018 20:19

I agree OP. I unfollowed a school mum on facebook becaise sje posted every blooming time her son got a house point.. you can only imagine the deluge of posts when he got a merit in his grade 2 piano exam had to be seen to be believed! I imagine that if his report was good every last comment will be up on facebook!

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PitterPatterOfBigFeet · 15/07/2018 20:23

YADNBU. My DS is very academic but I would cringe at the idea of sharing his report. Clearly no one outside of the immediate family is going to be genuinely interested anyway so it's just showing off for the sake of it.

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Matilda15 · 15/07/2018 20:24

I certainly haven’t posted DS report on social media....

Because not only does it say he’s in year 1 (he’s in year 2) but it also refers to him as ‘her’ twice.

Luckily DS has seen the funny side and keeps asking what “your year 1 daughter” is getting for her treat for such a good report. 😂

I have written a note on the return slip to confirm receipt to explain my displeasure but I will dine out on this for years when my Mum goes on about how hard teachers work to get things right!

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coastalchick · 15/07/2018 20:27

I think it’s awful. The poor child may not want their report plastered all over social media in perpetuity. I really hate FB.

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Firsttimemum892 · 15/07/2018 20:31

Yes it is crass I seen somebody do it and cringed

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steff13 · 15/07/2018 20:37

DS has just learnt to swim - should i post that or would that piss on everybody's chips?

If you were my friend and you posted about that, I would be super excited. I'm always excited for my friends' kids' achievements.

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roboticmom · 15/07/2018 20:38

My DD's best friend's Dad is bad for casually slipping in his DD's results into conversation. It drives me mad. It is so so competitive and cringey. He doesn't do it online though. I think it's worse in person...

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TheThirdOfHerName · 15/07/2018 20:40

I share on Facebook if it's something I consider to be an outstanding achievement for them.

Examples of some of my children's achievements I've boasted about on Facebook:

  • Achieving good GCSE results after two years of chronic illness.
  • Winning a national maths prize.
  • Having the most housepoints in the school (1200 pupils).
  • Being awarded an academic prize at secondary school after having significant early developmental delay (starting Reception not yet speaking in sentences).
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PlusCaChangePlusCestLaMemeChos · 15/07/2018 20:41

I don't like it and as a teacher I find the boastful posts from fellow teachers about cards and presents unnecessary too and I get plenty myself so it's not jealousy.
Surely a post saying your pleased with DC's report would do, no-one needs pics or quotes from it.

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RoadToRivendell · 15/07/2018 20:41

I agree it's crass and I can't understand why anyone thinks that anyone else really cares. I talk to my husband and in-laws about my kids' academics - it goes no further.

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Hidillyho · 15/07/2018 20:42

I wouldn’t do it but then again I seem to be in a minority of people who have never shared a photo of DC over Facebook.
My view is that I didn’t have to grow up splashed across social media so why should my DC. They will make the decision when they are old enough (although it’ll probably be a different platform then)

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