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Aibu to want to put my man child husband in a nappy?

(122 Posts)
Celp28 Thu 12-Jul-18 18:07:23

๐Ÿ˜ก need a little vent and possibly for someone to tell me that Iโ€™m massively overreacting and this is perfectly acceptable behaviour from an over grown man child! We have both been at work, admittedly he starts earlier than me at 7am until 2 pm, I work 8.30 until 4.30pm. Dh picked up ds2 (3yo) from grandparents. Ds2 is unwell with a cold - so much snot itโ€™d fill the Grand Canyon! Ds2 falls asleep in the car on way home about 3.30pm, dh carries him in and letโ€™s him sleep. I come home at 4.45pm, ds2 still asleep. I ask dh to wake him up while I go to supermarket for needed supplies. 5.20pm I return, ds still asleep. As I walk in the bag splits, shopping spread all over the drive. At this precise moment ds1 (12yo) comes to the door, the dog has eaten a sock and no joke itโ€™s hanging out of his bum ds1 understandably refuses to remove the offending bum sock. So Iโ€™m gathering food items from the drive and trying to prevent the bum sock from entering the house. I shout to dh to come help who says he canโ€™t as ds2 needs his nose wiping in his sleep and heโ€™s busy. Wait a couple of minutes, shout for him to bring a poo bag or something to help me retrieve the bum sock before the dog gets in the house. He still doesnโ€™t come. He then shouts that Iโ€™m always stressing and finally gets off his bum to come see the commotion. He then literally gags and runs in the house and leaves me with arms full of food and a dog with a sock hanging out his arse! So needless to say, I put my big girl pants on, pulled out the sock, packed away the shopping, woke up the snot monster myself and am now cooking dinner all while he complains that the dog is gross and itโ€™s put him off his dinner just thinking about the sock! Are all men this big a babies? He seriously thinks his life is stressful ๐Ÿ˜ก

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira Thu 12-Jul-18 18:11:00

What a bellend OP Iโ€™d be fuming too.

In fact Iโ€™d stop cooking and tell him heโ€™s going out for chips (or takeaway of choice) as he can actually be useful for once.

ProfessorMoody Thu 12-Jul-18 18:25:13

Sorry, but ๐Ÿ˜‚ ๐Ÿ˜‚ ๐Ÿ˜‚

MonkeySlutIsBlown Thu 12-Jul-18 18:27:45

I am genuinely howling ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜ญ

Bananalanacake Thu 12-Jul-18 18:29:36

Do dogs really eat socksshock

NewYearNewMe18 Thu 12-Jul-18 18:30:06

Why does he need a nappy?

tenbob Thu 12-Jul-18 18:30:37

Big glass of wine for you, OP

I know it probably doesn't help, but you've made my day. Howling at your post grin

Mammalamb Thu 12-Jul-18 18:31:30

Itโ€™s the bloody dog that needs a nappy to catch his sock shites

MrsClutterworth Thu 12-Jul-18 18:31:53

๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

wagil Thu 12-Jul-18 18:37:41

Our dog brought up a football sock ten days after swallowing it, he obviously couldn't pass it the other way. Not sure what's worse.

YANBU OP, I get all the crap jobs too, DH is too sensitive.

Kidssendingmenuts Thu 12-Jul-18 18:39:07

That is hilarious ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ bloody bum sock! Ha ha x

henpeckedinchief Thu 12-Jul-18 18:39:16

I am crying with laughter. Please start a blog OP! We would all read it!

Reminds me of a friend of mine whose dog ate a ball of string. She noticed the tail of it hanging out of his arse in the park, used two sticks to pull it all out. In her words, 'by the time it was all out I had practically knitted a scarf' grin

And no YANBU - what a useless lump your DH was! Get yourself on to a large wine and tell him he owes you a foot rub wine

dontticklethetoad Thu 12-Jul-18 18:40:28

BUM SOCK I need to find a place for this phrase in my life.

Yes, your husband sounds like a massive arse hat.

rollingonariver Thu 12-Jul-18 18:43:40

In our house it might be the other way around, if anything. No, not all men are like this and tell him so.

Riotgrrrrrl Thu 12-Jul-18 18:44:59

Sorry OP but thank you. I've just got home from a rotten day at work and this has really made me laugh! grin

Wellfuckmeinbothears Thu 12-Jul-18 18:45:25

Iโ€™m sorry op but this gave me a much needed giggle. My exes parents once had to help their dog pass a peg envy< not envy>. Our twat of a dog once ate a tube of thiamin tablets, luckily only 2 tabs in there but, my god, I have never seen shit like it.

beargrass Thu 12-Jul-18 18:46:33

I have no advice but also crying actual tears! ๐Ÿ˜‚

noradoor Thu 12-Jul-18 18:47:46

This is exactly what my partner is like. And he wouldn't understand why I would be fuming as you are!

I actually had a bum sock like event. The cat ate some of my hair and it had a dingle berry effect . Spotted said dingle berries when she jumped on bed with shit dangling a few cm out her arse! Without really thinking about it I got up quickly and pulled hair out of cats arse with shit still dangling and ran to loo with it. If I had left it to him he probably would have spent 20 minutes pointing out how gross it was while she rolled around on bed smeering shit everywhere. Just read that back, why the fuck do we have pets ?

WatcherintheRye Thu 12-Jul-18 18:49:02

I think you might want to look at revising your current division of tasks, op. From the vignette above, it looks like this:

Op - Work, do shopping, remove bum sock, put away shopping, wake up ds, cook dinner.

Op's dh - Work, pick up ds, wipe nose of ds.

What's wrong with this picture? grin

honeybeeq Thu 12-Jul-18 18:49:22

Our dog recently had an operation to remove a Hulk sock from his stomach, along with a plastic man and some change.. I was a bit surprised as he's eaten a sock before and had no real issue but I think must have been the plastic man that did the damage this time.

Got a vet bill for ยฃ900 thank god for insurance!

KittyVonCatsworth Thu 12-Jul-18 18:49:53

๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ bum sock ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ I love you OP!

Jimmers Thu 12-Jul-18 18:50:03

Bum sock grin
The only thing that would make this any funnier is if youโ€™d snapped & farted ๐Ÿคฃ

gorgeoushazydaysofsummer Thu 12-Jul-18 18:50:51

Bum sock!!!! Am pretty impressed it got all the way through.

We had a similar incident with lametta with one of our cats... Let's just say the lametta was silver no more once it came out the other end ...

CammieKennaway Thu 12-Jul-18 18:51:03

I'm so sorry but I'm literally howling with laughter here - my husband can sometimes be a manchild too ....and both of my dogs are sock eating loveable weirdos

redexpat Thu 12-Jul-18 18:51:06

Some men get off on that you know.

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