To be p****d of my mother is showing people my wedding dress

(81 Posts)
Popsicle434544 Tue 26-Jun-18 17:23:28

Went dress shopping saturday, found THE dress, my mum was one of the people that came with me, I said no pics.
Today my sil whats capped me say she loves my dress and how shes suprised that style suits me hmm
Say my mother sent them a pic.

Called mother, she says cheekily she had sneaked a couple of pics and not to worry, she has only showed my dad angry and my bro and sil.
Oh and Marge down the pub hmm

I'm fuming

OP’s posts: |
Popsicle434544 Tue 26-Jun-18 17:24:28

Pls excuse typos, on mobile x

OP’s posts: |
Pippa12 Tue 26-Jun-18 17:25:18

Id be tempted to change the dress.... she wouldnt be informed and no further info would be given?

Barkface Tue 26-Jun-18 17:25:52

It's a shame it's your wedding dress, any other occasion I'd be tempted to change it and not tell anyone! Sorry op, she probably just got carried away and thought it was so lovely she had to share. Don't blame you for being pissed though, I hope she doesn't do that kind of thing to you regularly.

PurpleDaisies Tue 26-Jun-18 17:26:14

Did you know she’s taken the picture?

HoomanMoomin Tue 26-Jun-18 17:26:57

I would change it. And wouldn’t tell her.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Tue 26-Jun-18 17:27:36

The cool people will be on any minute to tell you it doesn’t matter and you should be pleased she’s interested/excited.

I’d be pissed off. I’d consider saying she’s ruined it for you and you’re going shopping for a different style. Then order the first one.

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Aprilshouldhavebeenmyname Tue 26-Jun-18 17:29:31

I would have 'The Rage'....
Except I had the sense of getting married and not telling dm at all!!
Genius imo.

ferrier Tue 26-Jun-18 17:30:36

I'd be pissed off too. I'd tell her. I'd tell her I was changing the dress and not let her see it again.
I may or may not change the dress. I would probably at least get some details changed if I could.

mummymeister Tue 26-Jun-18 17:33:03

if she has got the pics on the phone then she will show anyone and everyone. so you first need to get them deleted. in front of you, don't just trust her if she says she has.

then tell her that because she has done this, you were so upset by it that you have gone and got another/different dress. even if you decide not to do this, you have to tell her that you have so she understands how wrong this was and also so that if she is tech savvy and has the pictures stored elsewhere she will know not to show them around.

I wouldn't be cool about it. I would be livid.

Fruitcorner123 Tue 26-Jun-18 17:36:02

do what testing said and make it clear how disappointed you are. She was out of order especially showing your dad.

Curtainshopping Tue 26-Jun-18 17:36:44

Why does it matter if people have seen it?

Maelstrop Tue 26-Jun-18 17:43:42

Why does it matter if people have seen it?

Because it’s upset the OP and her mum doesn’t have the right to show everyone. It’s not her wedding, it’s her daughter’s and usually, the dress is a surprise. That’s why.

fuzzyfozzy Tue 26-Jun-18 17:44:38

I'd be annoyed too

GabriellaMontez Tue 26-Jun-18 17:45:23

I'd change it and not show her. What a cow.

DuchyDuke Tue 26-Jun-18 17:46:17

If you don’t like it then get another dress.

Aprilshouldhavebeenmyname Tue 26-Jun-18 17:55:13

Your dm has paved the way to not be trusted.
You would be wise to always remember that.

Cantaana Tue 26-Jun-18 17:55:35

Don't get another dress. Apart from the fact it's the dress you love, if you bought it on Saturday and presumably signed paperwork and paid a deposit or even the full amount then you are bound to buy the dress. They may well have already placed the order. That's a costly decision. Get your mum's phone and delete the pics. Don't let her come to any future appointments. You WILL look different on the day even in the same dress but still damage control!

You were quite right to say no pics. I always advise against pictures, even after the dress is bought. I always get looked at like a mean cow but really do you want a photograph of yourself in a dress that doesn't fit right yet, sweaty from trying on previous gowns, in bad light, on a non professional camera phone?

Ps anyone who thinks they get away with photographing on the sly. You don't. I see you!

callkiki Tue 26-Jun-18 17:59:44

I'd be upset too. My lovely SD is getting married and I'm walking her down the isle and am every mindful of not trying to try and input my likes over hers and be respectful of her wishes.

If I had been told no pictures, then absolutely no pictures. Even if I had sneaked a few, they would have been kept hidden until after the wedding and then showed her in case she wanted them for her wedding memory book I gave her.

Justmuddlingalong Tue 26-Jun-18 18:02:38

Tell her no further details of the wedding. She's proven she can't hold her water, so to prevent any other 'slip ups', keep everything else to yourself. flowers I'm sorry she's spoiled the surprise.

ShirleyPhallus Tue 26-Jun-18 18:05:16

Out of order from your mums part but don’t underestimate how absolutely unbothered other people will be from details of someone else’s wedding. Put the dress in a lineup of 10 others and I’d be surprised if he could pick it out!

MyKingdomForBrie Tue 26-Jun-18 18:06:13

That was mean of her angry I hope you don't let it spoil the dress for you though as it really doesn't matter and you won't care on the day.

ShirleyPhallus Tue 26-Jun-18 18:06:36

(“He” being your dad)

pigsDOfly Tue 26-Jun-18 18:11:47

That's not on, of course you're fuming.

Let that be a lesson learned. If you're planning on having children in the future, don't give her any information, such as the sex, if you don't want all your relations and her friends to know before you give birth.

Any announcements you want to keep to private for whatever reason need to be kept secret from her until you're ready for everyone to know.

Gatecrasher61 Tue 26-Jun-18 18:14:19

The Bridezilla is strong.

It is just a dress. You have a 40% chance the wedding will end in a divorce.

Chill

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