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To ask how to tackle a celibate relationship

(1 Post)
CalishataFolkart Wed 13-Jun-18 22:54:56

Hello all,

Posting on behalf of a friend (40) really needing advice on how to start the conversation with her DP (45) regarding the lack of sex in their relationship.

Please take it as read that she absolutely KNOWS that they need to talk, it’s just suggestions of how to go about it that are being asked for.

Background - together for 3.5 years, sex was fine in the first year but nothing for the last two.

There have been MH and weight issues on both sides leading to low self-esteem, but my friend is dealing with hers. He has started going to the gym but his MH remains a problem (anxiety) which medication doesn’t help.

She has once raised the subject saying she felt they would never have sex again and he replied, “We will!” but the conversation went no further.

She doesn’t want him to feel obliged to “perform” but does feel something is missing from the relationship.

So as not to dripfeed his anxiety has made him quite adept at avoiding situations he cannot/doesn’t want to deal with and he often puts up barriers to even reasonable suggestions.

Any advice is gratefully received as this is a man she loves and wants to spend her life with, but this is a big problem.

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