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To be sadder to say goodbye to the dogs than the ex?

(5 Posts)
Foreverlexicon Wed 13-Jun-18 16:29:48

Relationship has broken down.
Today ex came and took our dogs as I can’t look after them by myself.

I work long hours and not unusual for me to be out the house 17 hours at a time so even with a dog walker it’s too long. And it’s shiftwork so crèches ect wouldn’t work. Whereas she has tonnes of flexibility and keeping the dogs isn’t really an issue for her so it’s best for them.

I’ve been crying since lunchtime and thrown up twice because of it. The ex left a week ago (although we officially broke up in april) and I’m not really bothered as that died a death a long time ago.

Posting for a handhold really - house is horribly quiet. I lost my collie of 11 years a year ago so when we got these puppies I never imagined saying goodbye to them so soon. Never lived on my own without a dog - I used to be able to take them to work so was always fine before.

I’ve been offered visitation rights but I’m not sure if I’ll do that. It’s not the same 😔

sonjadog Wed 13-Jun-18 16:32:42

Poor you. I would be gutted if I had to say goodbye to my dog. Much sympathies.

woolythoughts Wed 13-Jun-18 16:35:31


I stayed in an emotionally abusive relationship for, I estimate, and extra 4 years due to not wanting to give up the cats.

We lived in a house in the middle of nowhere - he worked from home permanently and I consulted all over the country/world so it made sense I would be the one to leave.

But I couldn't bring myself to do it for four years because I couldnt bear not seeing the cats again!

In the end it was drinking over a litre of gin a day and being told I had a drink problem and my instict was "I don't have a drink problem, I have a husband problem" that prompted me to leave.

I no longer had a husband problem but I broke my heart over the cats.

Rowgtfc72 Wed 13-Jun-18 16:42:13

When I split up with my ex I kept the dogs and he used to visit. Was a bit awkward at first but we got used to it. When I had dd with new dh he used to bring pigs ears for the dogs and chocolate for dd. We'd been over for a long time before we split too so was easier to keep it unemotional.

Foreverlexicon Wed 13-Jun-18 17:00:36

Glad I’m not the only one. I have to admit, I am trying to persuade her to rent my spare room (which head says BAD IDEA) but heart says Dogs can stay.

It feels so horribly quiet! They’re such lovely funny little dogs too. One thinks she’s a cat and climbs on the back of the sofa then wiggles into your lap making all these grunting noises. The other one; every night I got home from a shift and into bed, she would come and lie next to me so I was spooning her and rubbing her belly. If I stopped she would wiggle closer. And she smelt like shavings. Like a woodland creature.

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