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To ask him why

(15 Posts)
greenhills2015 Wed 13-Jun-18 14:24:59

DP has now started following his ex girlfriend again on Instagram after previously removing her. She is newly single.

I am unreasonable to ask him why he did this?

I had a baby 7 months ago so body confidence is at a low and this is niggling at me - I don't suspect cheating or anything like that but would like to know why he has now decided he would like to look at pictures of her again (she has a private profile so he couldn't snoop without following her)

Am aware I am in danger of sounding like a psycho.

Shoxfordian Wed 13-Jun-18 14:31:48

He's disrespectful
How did you find out about it? Is he messaging her or just looking at pictures? What kind of pictures? Sorry for all the questions but I wondered about the context of it. You're not a psycho!

BabbittyRabbittyCacklingStump Wed 13-Jun-18 14:32:15

I wouldn't think you are unreasonable for asking why he has done this. It is very odd given that he has previously removed her from his social media. Has he recently been in contact with her?

Letmesuckyourblood Wed 13-Jun-18 14:39:10

Definitely not being unreasonable! Id be asking why he's suddenly felt the urge to follow her again... bit disrespectful towards you tbh.

greenhills2015 Wed 13-Jun-18 14:45:09

Don't think he is messaging her but I don't go on his phone so I can't say for certain.

I know he unfollowed her because a couple of years ago on holiday I turned to talk to him as he was looking on Instagram and it was a selfie of hers, I didn't say anything but he must have seen on my face that I wasn't happy so unfollowed her.

She came up on my suggested to follow and it said followed my DP which shocked me a little.

I will have to ask him at some point because I'm stewing on it now.

Butterflykissess Wed 13-Jun-18 14:53:51


PinkHeart5914 Wed 13-Jun-18 15:00:20

Many people follow or are friends with exes on social media it’s really not unsual.

I also don’t see how it’s disrespectful to follow someone you know, most people don’t ask there partner for permission to do this surely? Or inform said partner every time they follow someone do they? It’s not like his following a random girl he has never met that posts semi naked.

Ok so last time you had a face on you so he unfollowed her confused well maybe he just wanted to see what she was up to ( lots of us have been curious about an ex) and since you now have a baby together clearly your in a serious relationship so why would it be an issue

Letmesuckyourblood Thu 14-Jun-18 11:32:25

Because it makes her feel uncomfortable and she doesn't like it and he knows this but has done it anyway... disrespectful

greenhills2015 Thu 14-Jun-18 13:19:28

@PinkHeart5914 I wouldn't have minded if he was always following her, just that he's removed her and it's playing on my mind why now he has decided he wants to look at her pictures again

ElinorOliphantIsCompletelyFine Thu 14-Jun-18 13:22:14

Ask him, but it sounds like you have trust issues. I have an ex on my Facebook, and my partner isn't bothered at all!

xoguineas Thu 14-Jun-18 16:18:52

YANBU. I would ask why and would feel pretty rubbish if my partner done this, especially after just having had a baby!

MrsTerryPratchett Thu 14-Jun-18 16:20:59

Is she the one that got away?

LifeBeginsAtGin Thu 14-Jun-18 16:45:22

Are there other red flags?

greenhills2015 Fri 15-Jun-18 07:03:44

@MrsTerryPratchett not that I know of, she lost interest in him and they broke up a few times over the course of 18 months before mutually deciding to end it

comfortandjoy Fri 15-Jun-18 07:15:50

There are so many accounts on IG with different themes - DIY, interiors , health stuff, parenting ,travel. If it’s someone you’ve met in real life then you have more of a connection with the account so I think would be likely to follow . Even if it was an ex, why not? I have a couple of exes who are in a creative field and follow them , they take good photos - I can’t inagine my DP being bothered . It sounds like there must be some other issues for this to be a problem.

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