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"Hello Moneybags". AIBU?

(94 Posts)
Flatpackjackie Wed 13-Jun-18 10:44:45

I'm a violin, viola and cello teacher, charging £14 for half an hour and £25 for an hour (standard rate in my county).

My friend is a cleaner and charges £15 per hour (also standard for our area AFAIK).

She's recently cottoned-on to the fact that my hourly rate is higher than hers and keeps making snide remarks about it; sometimes face to face, but also online, in chats with friends.

For example, I invited a group (via WhatsApp) to a barbecue at my house. Just a small thing, nothing posh at all. Her reply "Yes please. The champagne will be flowing if it's at yours, Moneybags!"

This morning at drop-off, it was "Hello Moneybags", in front of everyone, which was confusing and really embarrassing.

I don't earn a lot in fact, and I'm certainly not flash. I've never commented on her earnings. The only reason I know what she charges is because she told me, after seeing my fees on my website.

AIBU to wish she'd drop it and also to I should expect to charge the going rate for my lessons? So as not to drip-feed, I've been playing string instruments for thirty five years; have a degree in music and also teaching qualifications. I haven't just set-up shop with no experience.


Tangled59 Wed 13-Jun-18 10:49:05

Next time just say: "Why Moneybags?" And when she explains "hourly rate blah blah" just be like "its called being a skilled professional".

FrozenMargarita17 Wed 13-Jun-18 10:49:30

What a ridiculous thing for her to say to you !

MissionItsPossible Wed 13-Jun-18 10:50:17

YANBU. "Hello Moneybags" would elicit a "Hi, Pauper" from me. Any comments about champagne would be met with "Thank god, I wouldn't want to have to go to your dump and drink White Lightning". It's just rude. It's like when people wouldn't dream of commenting on an overweight's person size but have no problem saying to a thin person that they are far too skinny and look anorexic.

KittyVonCatsworth Wed 13-Jun-18 10:51:46

^ this (tangled). Passive aggressive jealousy is the only reason I can come up with. Ignore and reduce contact if need be. You’ve worked hard for your specialist area and don’t let anyone put a dampener on it.

frasier Wed 13-Jun-18 10:53:29

Your friend is rude, jealous and rude. Offer to teach her to play the violin so in, say 20 odd years, she can start to teach also!

Plus, are you near London? Your rates are very good!

AnyLondoner Wed 13-Jun-18 10:53:30

YANBU. Ignore, she's jealous. But can I ask why you are expected to charge the same? I mean you're a cellist and she's a cleaner?

AhoyDelBoy Wed 13-Jun-18 10:56:17

Yes she sounds jealous and rude with it.

60sname Wed 13-Jun-18 10:58:23

If she hasn't cottoned on by now that there are more highly paid jobs than cleaning (especially when you get into skilled roles) then she must be very slow on the uptake indeed!

Poloshot Wed 13-Jun-18 10:58:28

Jealousy at you being able to charge a higher hourly rate. Maybe I'm wide of the mark but she may earn more than you as probably more capacity for her to work more hours as a cleaner than you as a violin teacher so it could be the other way round. Lol,

binglyboo Wed 13-Jun-18 10:58:41

'Can you stop calling me that please,'

TheMaddHugger Wed 13-Jun-18 10:58:42

give her one of these

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar Wed 13-Jun-18 10:58:55

She sounds both rude and ignorant. Btw, does she seriously imagine she should be earning a comparable amount by cleaning?

frasier Wed 13-Jun-18 11:00:02

TheMaddHugger 😂😂😂

AnyLondoner Wed 13-Jun-18 11:01:02

Iamgreyhound why not?hmm

WaitroseCoffeeCostaCup Wed 13-Jun-18 11:01:56

Because that's not the hourly rate for cleaning...

PanPanPanPing Wed 13-Jun-18 11:03:25

I wonder if it's occurred to her that, assuming she's a good cleaner and has a number of regular clients, she may be working far more hours per week than you do?

Sorry, I'm making an assumption here that, as a private music teacher, perhaps your hours might be more erratic, i.e. after school only for your school age pupils and perhaps your adult (working) pupils don't have too many spare hours for music lessons?

So in actual fact both your overall earnings might not be dissimilar?

(Just seen Poloshot's comment along the same lines!)

Very rude of her to comment though.

Naynayba Wed 13-Jun-18 11:04:19

LITERALLY get your violin out for her and play a sad tune. I would.

You're a skilled professional, almost anyone can clean. Not that cleaning isnt a worthy profession, but it does NOT require the same investment as musician.

SeaCabbage Wed 13-Jun-18 11:04:36

She sounds rather stupid. I echo a PP, next time, tell her to stop calling you that.

Biker47 Wed 13-Jun-18 11:04:51

I'd ask them to stop the next time they did it, and if they continued with it I'd go ahead with MissionItsPossible's suggestion.

shiklah Wed 13-Jun-18 11:05:44

How can you resist rubbing your fingers together and describing it as
‘The worlds smallest violin playing just for you’

frogsoup Wed 13-Jun-18 11:08:28

AnyLondoner is that a serious question? By and large, teaching a skill that takes decades to master tends to command higher wages than something that almost anybody can do. I think you must know this!

NataliaOsipova Wed 13-Jun-18 11:08:35

She's recently cottoned-on to the fact that my hourly rate is higher than hers

She's only just cottoned on to the fact that a professional music teacher charges more than a cleaner? How much does she think, say, her dentist charges? Or her solicitor? Everyone would assume you charged more. (Agree with a pp that your rates are low - £35 an hour round here!)

Returnofthesmileybar Wed 13-Jun-18 11:09:22

I would just text her

"I am not sure if you are trying to be funny, but as with all jokes they get boring when constantly repeated, that's what has happened with your "moneybags" jokes, it's boring, not to mention rude, please stop saying it"

StruggsToFunc Wed 13-Jun-18 11:09:38

Obviously she IBU and very very rude.

I am intrigued, however - her rate seems pretty high to me, and yours seems quite low. We are in an affluent part of the west Midlands where the going rate for cleaning is £10-12 / hr, whilst music tuition is typically £28-30 / hr!

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